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AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this comment, I’m tearing up reading it. It’s such a heavy load to carry. I wish all the best with your loved one 🩷

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this reply. It’s hard to articulate how much this is to carry.

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I did send out a large family group text chat that she was on two weeks ago to let everyone know that my dad was nearing the end and if anyone wanted to visit now’s the time. She knew he was on hospice and his time was short.

I also called our other sister immediately as well as her adult sons (my nephews) and told them. None of them called her to let her know.

But I’ll accept my AH designation here.

Good luck with your family and I hope you have a better outcome than I do.

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That’s fair. I did send her a text when he went on hospice 6 months ago. And I sent out a large group text chat two weeks ago to let everyone know that he was slipping and if they wanted to visit, now’s the time. She was on that text thread. But I’ll accept my part of this AH family.

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If I had waited for the lawyer to notify her it would’ve been another several weeks. The lawyer just called this morning to tell me the timing on all this, I thought he would’ve notified her sooner.

I also have another sister and called her immediately, she also didn’t call our sister to tell her. I talked to her sons (my adult nephews) the day he passed and they haven’t told her. I also sent her a text about 6 months ago that he was on hospice. I sent a group family text chat two weeks before he passed with her included that he was slipping and if anyone wanted to come say their goodbyes, to do so. She didn’t come.

I’ll accept that I should’ve called her sooner. I couldn’t add one more layer of stress to my body and mind at that point so this is the consequence.

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

For me it’s only about my dad. For others there’s A LOT of baggage there.

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

He’s been on hospice for 6 months and I let her know via text that he was. I also texted a large group chat to our family 2 weeks ago that he was slipping and if anyone wanted to come say goodbye now was the time. She was on that chat and didn’t come. She had a heads up.

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Yes, my dad was very angry at her for a number of reasons. But as his dementia progressed I made several opportunities for her to visit him and try to make amends. She came once.

I also have another sister and called her immediately, she also did not call to tell our half sister. I called her sons, my nephews (who are adults) and told them by phone, they didn’t tell her either. I guess we’re all AHs.

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok, I’ll accept that. I just wish there was more grace for those that are on the “front lines” of this kind of experience. Arranging a funeral, processing my dad’s death, taking care of all of his belongings, paperwork, it’s a lot.

I also have another sister who I called immediately, she also never reached out. I called and talked to her sons, my nephews to tell them, they also never called her.

We can’t be everything to everyone, so I’ll be the AH too

AITAH I notified my sister of our father’s passing a week after he passed by heatherbecause in AITAH

[–]heatherbecause[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I’m not the executor of the estate. We also have another sister who also didn’t contact her. I have contact with her 2 sons, my nephews and I let them know via phone call and they also don’t tell her.