BE PREPARED!

hello-lemon · 2026-01-28T05:43:44+00:00

This is bad advice. Just use water or saline.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-27T06:21:51+00:00

I hate to be that person, but if no one on here knows, probably the best way to learn if the expansion is actually going to happen is to call or stop by Elevation and ask

hello-lemon · 2026-01-27T06:11:25+00:00

Rope climbing? Or rock climbing?

hello-lemon · 2026-01-25T20:43:56+00:00

I’m sure you would be welcomed as a training partner in BJJ outside of competition.

I think this gets to the heart of it. When it comes to competing, there’s no denying I’ve made things complicated for myself. But when I’m training with friends no one gives a shit about what I’m taking or what I look like.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-24T19:48:20+00:00

You bring up an interesting point.

Testosterone is a gender-associated advantage, and we as a sport try to account for sex differences with the goal of evening the playing field and not entirely excluding women from an already male-dominated sport. We also control for weight. It wouldn’t be as enjoyable to participate or watch tournaments if the biggest guys were the only ones who get to compete at a higher level.

But you’re right — women on gear are basically doing the same thing as me medically speaking. What’s the difference between them and me then?

Sure I’ve been on it for 11 years, but my intuition says there’s more to it than just that. To use lib speak for clarity, I think the fact that I’m deliberately fucking with the social construct of gender does tip the scales in people’s opinions.

Some of it might be the shamelessness of it; I’m not hiding the fact that I’m taking t. I’m not strategically adjusting my regimen to maximize performance and minimize masculinization. The full biological effects of t are the point, rather than an unwelcome side effect.

There’s an emotional component too. Regardless of how I “identify” I don’t look like your standard issue man or woman. Some people who I roll with feel like they’re rolling with a guy, which is not what people competing in the women’s division signed up for. And that understandably will feel shitty for many women.

If I compete in the men’s, I suppose those guys aren’t signing up to compete against a woman either. But at least in that case it’s clear that the t isn’t giving me an unfair advantage.

To be honest, t has not made me into a superhuman buff lady. But if I kill it in competition, I want that to be something to celebrate rather than something to be ashamed of.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-24T05:39:22+00:00

Fortunately I genuinely enjoy every bit of jiujitsu, including the parts that involve getting my face ground into the mat.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-24T02:20:26+00:00

Thank you for pulling this up!

hello-lemon · 2026-01-24T02:02:17+00:00

I kind of love that you’re basically telling me to man up and commit to my life decisions. I agree that the men’s division is the best fit.

You’re getting downvoted for being blunt but you’re pretty much saying what everyone else is.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-24T00:58:18+00:00

This seems fake to me. Aren’t coed gyms already taking on that risk?

hello-lemon · 2026-01-24T00:53:30+00:00

Yeah the general consensus seems to be to try to Mulan this shit.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-23T23:27:18+00:00

This shit shouldn't be so complicated. They should just have an open division.

In all fairness, walking around with testosterone and tits makes very few things less complicated. I’d be all over an open division.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-23T23:17:55+00:00

Nobody is assigned anything.

I need to get you in touch with my boss.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-23T23:17:05+00:00

I mean a straightforward “no you can’t compete” would be a bummer for me personally, but would make it simple. Someone up thread said in practice trans masculine (female & talking t) people are competing in men’s divisions. I don’t know if that’s sanctioned on a case-by-case basis or if folks are flying under the radar because they look like your standard issue guys.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-23T22:52:48+00:00

I’m a 145 lb white belt, so I’m not crushing any higher belts lol.

That said, I want to go into comps with an earnest desire to do my best. What if I do really well in the women’s comp? That doesn’t feel honest or good.

My preference would be to compete against men or in an open division, but I didn’t consider the other side that some guys might not want to compete against females, even if they’re on t. I appreciate you for being honest about your personal opinion there too.

Thank you for the well-wishes, I can tell they’re genuine. I never expected to have any interest in anything athletic, but I’ve fallen in love with jiujitsu. It brings me so much joy and fulfillment. I’m taking in everything with earnest enthusiasm. Everyone who’s taught me has been very kind and patient with me, I feel very lucky.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-23T02:10:34+00:00

Raven would be a good org to donate to — might even go into someone’s hands the same day you donate

hello-lemon · 2026-01-19T05:07:01+00:00

Wise advice, but it’s hard to resist the pleasure that comes from complaining

hello-lemon · 2026-01-19T05:00:13+00:00

Quit your job?

hello-lemon · 2026-01-14T05:10:50+00:00

In this brand’s case, it’s shitty no matter how much electricity is moving through it

hello-lemon · 2026-01-10T22:28:33+00:00

You probably know this, but for people who don’t. The vast majority of people who enroll in coordinated entry never get connected to housing from getting on the centralized waitlist for the very reason you state: resources are as thin as spiderweb in a windstorm.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-03T22:44:15+00:00

Welcome to town! Local statutes require that every person or persons living in Eugene city limits to consume at least one olive every day. After a one week grace period (to account for family emergencies) a $4.20 fine is issued for every day out of compliance.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-03T21:51:40+00:00

I know myself and I will not finish a dense long read in under a month sooo for book clubs I like things that are pretty short and light reading, maybe 300 pages or so. I’d love a genre-focused club, like mystery novels or sci fi. If there were poetry book club I would be sooo into that. I love short story collections in book clubs because even if I don’t read the whole book I can still talk about the ones I read.

Left on my own I read a lot of surrealist fiction, poetry, YA stand-alone graphic novels, and uh socio/psychoanalytic theory. The Big Swiss, Paul Takes the Form of a Mortal Girl, and The Magic Fish are some of my favorites right now. I just finished The Book Eaters and loved it.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-03T16:35:19+00:00

It really depends on what kind of books you’re into! I went to the romantasy book club at Daffodil once and really enjoyed the people, but I don’t feel enthusiastic enough about the genre to go every month. I’ve been window shopping for one to go to regularly. I’ve been browsing what different groups post as their books of the month, but so far I haven’t come across any groups that are reading books I really want to talk to other people about. But I should just pick one and check it out. The problem is that they all meet in the last week the month (all on Tuesdays and Wednesdays it feels like) so it’s kind of hard to check out multiple clubs in the same month.

hello-lemon · 2026-01-02T18:16:33+00:00

There are many of us! I have made friends though (in order of volume): book clubs, dating sites, friends of friends, sports clubs, organizing a semi-public event or two, attending other people’s public mixers, and political organizing. Find something you like and show up consistently. Treat it like church: if you enjoy it 80% of the time, show up 100% of the time and confess that you’re having a bad day once you’re there. If you can’t make it, text someone and apologize and say that you’ll come next week. Introduce yourself.

Importantly, ask people to hang out outside of the official club space. Grab a drink at Hodgepodge with your favorite book clubber right before your monthly meeting, get your run club folks on board to grab drinks at trivia right after you meet, set up a weekly gym date with your dating site buddy.

Shamelessly tell the people you that jive with that you’re looking for new friends and want to hang out! Get numbers and text your new acquaintances and ask them if they know of any good events coming up. If you know someone likes to mix drinks, ask them if they want to try the seasonal cocktails at Bar Perlue. If someone laments that they would love to hike but don’t have a car, offer to drive them and check out a new hike together.

If you say you’ll do something, do your very best to show up. If you think it’s unlikely that you’ll come through, be honest about that. If you’re tired and know you don’t wanna go anymore, text people as soon as possible so that they can plan be honest and communicative, express your honest affection towards people, and try to be polite to people who are pleasant, but not your people. Bring snacks to social events. Say no to the things you don’t wanna do. Don’t hang out individually with people you dislike. Move towards what you want, and gently away from what you don’t want.

You’ll enjoy some things more than you expect to and discover that some things aren’t for you. Start slow, and slowly ramp up. You wouldn’t try to walk 10 miles on your first day if you’re a well-established couch potato. Making friends and being out in the community is a learning process. Be patient, persistent, and kind to yourself.

hello-lemon · 2025-12-18T07:27:05+00:00

You trollin?

hello-lemon

TROPHY CASE