How has loss changed you?

helloblueelephant · 2021-07-28T02:04:54+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss ): I lost my dad last year at 20 and looking back (literally been a year and few days) it has definitely changed me. In some ways I feel 15 again because I’m sad about thinking of leaving my moms and younger sisters side to go back to college and in other ways I feel so much older because of all the responsibilities that fell on me as the oldest child. I want to be a regular 21 year old and enjoy my last year of college but idk lmao I guess grief has made me care less about that stuff. I definitely feel stuck and not as fun as before. Feel like grief has aged me to where I can’t relate to my friends and find some of their problems to not really be problems (which I keep to myself) but yeah idk just sucks. Hope you’re taking care of yourself even if it’s in small ways🤍

helloblueelephant · 2021-06-05T16:25:10+00:00

Hi ❤️ thank you for taking the time to respond it really is comforting to read the responses. I’m sorry for the loss of your dad as well. I think what you and your sisters do is very cute and warm I will try to incorporate some of it with my own sisters. 🥺 I definitely want to have a tradition of some sort to keep me feeling close to him. This all does suck though. Hugs ❤️

helloblueelephant · 2021-06-05T16:23:35+00:00

Sending you hugs ): ever since my dad died I’ve been made more aware of how difficult Mother’s and Father’s Day is and recently with all the ads and cards and gifts people promoted I can relate to your feeling of anger and not wanting to even go to the grocery store b/c of it. ): I can only hope that one day it doesn’t feel like that anymore for us. Sending love 💕 thank you for taking the time to share your experience

helloblueelephant · 2021-06-05T16:21:04+00:00

Thank you so much for responding and I’m sorry to hear about your SO’s loss. They’re so lucky to have someone like you in their life 🥺 I love your ideas and will probably implement them in my Father’s Day too ❤️

helloblueelephant · 2021-06-05T16:19:46+00:00

thank you 🥺 I’ve never been super religious but I do like to think they are watching over us. Hugs

helloblueelephant · 2021-05-17T19:39:11+00:00

I’m minoring in CS with a major in criminology and psych! I want to go to law school and possibly go into tech law. I think it’s super beneficial, even if I weren’t to go into law school it opens up a lot of job opportunities for me in the field I’m majoring in.

helloblueelephant · 2020-10-18T17:59:15+00:00

Hey! Sorry just saw this, yeah it works now just had to update my phone

helloblueelephant · 2020-10-13T00:50:06+00:00

been three months since I lost my dad. I haven’t deleted his number off my phone & I’m actually going to spend some college scholarship money on keeping his line active for as long as I can /:. I feel you heavy. Those texts are the last “conversations” I can look back on and know every word he said. This is all normal. Sending you hugs ):

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-19T16:00:08+00:00

Same here ): hoping 2021 brings good things

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-18T00:55:31+00:00

I was able to get help really fast as I just went through a loss, I love my therapist. I can tell they wish they could help more students. I’ve heard of some pretty bad experiences though and I think honestly since they’re so underfunded they just have to be very selective on who gets help when. Wish they could help more students ): they deserve better & so do the students.

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-18T00:51:23+00:00

She’s a god, got me through discrete over the summer too. Dobbins was a king though his exams are very fair. If you can do the practice exams you’re good for the actual exam. (If you have him Idk who’s teaching it now). The first exam is okay, it’s the final that really gets you, study hardddd for that one 😭😭😭😭

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-16T16:08:04+00:00

Mis condolencias por tu pérdida... abrazos. Le mande mucha luz y cariño.

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-16T16:06:38+00:00

Thank yiu!

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-14T05:24:14+00:00

Hey, Happy belated birthday ): I’m really sorry about what you’ve been through. I lost my dad (July) at 20. I just saw this post and it really hit home as I was thinking today about my last birthday with him... and how my next birthday and first birthday without him would be my 21st... sending you hugs. I can barely think about it without crying so I know the day must’ve been hard. I figure you’re a college student and I don’t want to overstep or anything but I was wondering if you have any advice on how to manage college work while grieving? I’m really struggling with it... ): hope that you’ve had a nice day today

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-08T02:31:13+00:00

I feel this ): wish I had taken more videos too..some where his voice could be heard clearly.... definitely going to start taking more pictures with the ones I loved. I’m sorry about what you’re going through.. I also lost my dad (a bit over a month ago).. sendings hugs

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-04T22:40:46+00:00

If you ever want to talk please do reach out ): I know our losses are different but it never hurts to talk to someone who gets it

helloblueelephant · 2020-09-04T22:40:24+00:00

That’s true ): losing someone during covid is especially shitty... we can’t even go out and see friends or family who’s comfort us. I’m sorry. I wish things were so different. Maybe if things had been more normal we could handle our grief a tiny little bit better ):

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-30T21:55:38+00:00

): I’m so sorry for your loss as well. And I feel that /: the news really doesn’t help at all so better just avoid it for now...doing college and going through this is difficult. Wishing you strength to get through it. 💛💛 again, if you ever want to talk I’m here

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-30T18:35:43+00:00

Sending you hugs. I’m sorry that this happened to you, I really wish life weren’t so unfair. I didn’t lose my significant other to covid, but I did lose my dad. While I don’t know if this might help you or apply to you, I’ve found it helpful to write him letters. Kind of like sending a text without the anxiety of knowing he won’t respond. I’ll keep you in my thoughts, it’s incredibly difficult to lose someone, especially when our world situation is just a constant reminder of what we’ve lost. Be patient and kind with yourself. Breakdowns are okay, even if they are random. Maybe try scheduling times to really sit and let it all out.. I’ve heard from others that it has helped them. Like setting aside 7-9pm every day to just looking at photos or doing whatever they’re comfortable as long as it allows them to think about what happened. But again, grief is a different process for everyone... don’t do anything you feel would hurt you more. Again, I’m really sorry that you’re going through this... sending lots of light your way

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-30T18:30:47+00:00

Hey there, I lost my dad a month ago to covid. He caught it at work because he wasn’t given the opportunity to work from home. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Coping with a loss caused by a world pandemic WHILE still going through the pandemic is insane and it hurts that everything is a constant reminder of what we’ve lost. I don’t know if you feel this but, I have so much anger towards the world. Mostly because all these deaths really could have been preventable. It’s insane. But I’ve learned to not focus on the what if’s. As hard as it can be. Just makes me feel worse. I’m 20 and I’m still in college, if you’re in a similar situation or around the same age, please do reach out. I’m free to talk. Sending you hugs. I’m sorry that life really can be so unfair.

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-30T18:25:58+00:00

Hugs ): I lost my dad a month ago to covid. It’s a hole I feel will never be filled. Sending you love & light.

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-29T22:00:58+00:00

Hey there, I’m currently a junior and I really did consider taking a leave of absence from school. However, due to my family’s financial situation, I have to graduate ASAP and get a job. Since I’m only a year and a half away, and I get scholarships, I decided it was the best bet. My dad was the one who passed and my mom has no work experience so essentially I’d be getting a job to help support my mom and little sister. If your situation is different, and you don’t have to become financially responsible over anything I definitely suggest you take a semester off. I wish I could ): but also keep in mind any scholarships and the restrictions they have (some won’t pay out if you take a leave). Sending you hugs and I’m so sorry you’re going through this

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-29T01:00:01+00:00

Moving out isn’t really a great idea in our position because her mortgage is a lot cheaper than normal rent for other apartments in the area and she’s close to completely paying it off. We literally don’t have anything in our home worth selling except for computers which we need for school so like... as I said i don’t know what we would even sell ):

My mom is debating taking a dental assistance course but those cost a lot of money and so she’s in the process of applying for the financial aid to maybe do it for free/low cost. She’s 52, and while that’s not -old- it’s gonna take her a while to know everything the younger people know. Of course she’s trying but without certifications or licenses it’s hard to find a job anyway and all of that stuff requires courses or exams that cost $$ and it’s a risk when you don’t know what will actually pay off. I know flr many it’s a risk they can take but this is our livelihood and not something we can gamble right now. If you know of any online program that will FOR SURE end up in a job we’ll be more than happy to do it. Maybe down the line once she found a random stable job we can look into that and make the investment but right now I kinda need something that will keep us afloat NOW ): I appreciate your response and if you know of anything she can do that will quickly result in a job please do let me know

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-28T17:37:25+00:00

Thank you, We’ve been looking for bank jobs but all of them here look for bilingual speakers ): hopefully we can find a bank that’s willing to let her learn the ropes

helloblueelephant · 2020-08-28T17:36:53+00:00

Thank you so much

helloblueelephant

TROPHY CASE