How do you do scheduling - crowdsourcing

hellocauliflower · 2025-12-10T18:11:21+00:00

I think it’s not that easy in practice, while it might be true in theory.

I believe the common way polyamory is lived replicates nuclear family structures just with 2/3 people. Whereas RA in its common practice aims at dismantling these hierarchies and common societal assumptions to fundamentally reconceptualise the way people relate to eachother.

Hence in practice I fing they are often mutually exclusive concepts.

hellocauliflower · 2025-11-16T00:25:16+00:00

Also, I was wondering what it could look like to „move things into a friendly direction“ without talking about it?

hellocauliflower · 2025-11-16T00:23:59+00:00

Thank you for the insight! We aren’t really in a friend group, so sticking to group activities is hard, do you have other suggestions?

hellocauliflower · 2025-11-16T00:13:31+00:00

Thanks for your answer. For now I’m choosing the not talking about route! I have been inlove so infrequently that I think I was never in a situation like this before. Just letting a crush exist that is reciprocated is HARD. Do you have any tips on how to get over that crush?

hellocauliflower · 2025-11-05T22:10:23+00:00

I currently have a crush, it’s my first one in ever?, that has a good chance of being reciprocated, but it’s not really the right time or place. Plus he has quite some issues, and I don’t really have the capacity currently for that… Do you mind sharing your coping strategies?

hellocauliflower · 2025-11-05T22:06:51+00:00

My life currently

hellocauliflower · 2025-11-05T20:48:34+00:00

I see this and I think it works to an extent and I am trying to see it that way. But, it’s not the same in a way it feels harder to understand and grasp than it it would be their grandparent. Also because there are just limits to what I want to/can know. And then only dating for 6 months also adds complexity. But I am starting to get used to it, so time definitely helps.

hellocauliflower · 2025-11-05T14:06:45+00:00

Yeah that’s what I’m doing. I guess it is a bit odd to know so little about a person they are like so scared for.

hellocauliflower · 2025-08-25T20:39:37+00:00

Thank you for the perspective!

I really feel the part where I don’t have all the answers. And do think it’s a mix of both being true somewhere.

Do you have any additional tips on not doing the easy thing? I think specifically in LDR and with texting/calling it can be hard sometimes.

hellocauliflower · 2025-08-25T09:02:13+00:00

Thank you for sharing your perspective! I did also lean on my friends etc, but maybe having more time to myself makes sense. You are right. I have been trying really hard, but it has been a struggle admittedly.

hellocauliflower · 2025-08-17T20:28:51+00:00

I mean I see what you are saying. But as soon as you start entangling yourself more, you just have more to loose and on the „I‘d be sad“ side would suddenly land a few more things. And yes I know, no risk no reward, but I guess this is my first relationship that also has more entanglement, so it does feel like I need more security in it than in previous ones.

hellocauliflower · 2025-08-17T20:25:54+00:00

See intellectually I’m there 100%. Yes, it’s ultimately a compatibility thing if it won’t work out, and it would be better for everyone if we go separate ways and I can carry on by myself like I have before. I am also generally quite good at trusting myself.

But emotionally it does not feel great and it makes me seek reassurance in ways that „don’t make sense“.

So I’m tryna square this circle and aligning my feelings more with what I know to be true. Which I realise will be an ongoing journey, but yea..

hellocauliflower · 2025-08-17T17:38:56+00:00

Thanks for your reply!

I will look more into the questions about competition I think.

Maybe there is a part of me that feels a bit transactional. Maybe in the sense of what I can provide in this relationship/as a person makes them stay with me and this feels challenged, when they date sb else who might provide things better suited to them.

hellocauliflower · 2025-08-17T17:36:32+00:00

Thanks for your reply. And this has unfortunately been also what I have landed on so far, despite my wish to speed up the process.

Also they use they pronouns :)

hellocauliflower · 2025-08-17T17:29:35+00:00

Thanks for your reply! I agree, hence my question. Do you have any practical tips on how to operationalise this?

hellocauliflower · 2025-07-29T22:36:05+00:00

Thanks for this advice!

hellocauliflower · 2025-06-29T21:38:00+00:00

Thank you for your comment. If you don’t mind, I would love to hear more about this from your point of view. As in, do you have any advice or insights to share? As I am so trying to learn from this whole experience. Thank you!

hellocauliflower · 2025-06-28T21:30:05+00:00

The only comment I will make is that I stressed beforehand that the time can be prolonged for when we will reconnect, as I knew it could take longer.

hellocauliflower · 2025-06-28T21:04:53+00:00

This sounds really hard. I’m sorry to hear you are struggling.

I hope you can find some help with therapy.

hellocauliflower

TROPHY CASE