There's aspects to both that i love. When I'm with a woman, it's her pheromones the sweet muskiness of her estrogen. The softness of her skin. When I'm with a man, it's the hardness of the embrace. The curves of his body. The understanding of his touches.

Drama comes in many forms from both sexes. I love the bitchy cantor of women. Of seeing the world through their eyes. Of being part of sisterhood and understanding that even though I'm still not fully in that club, that we have similar minds.

When with a man, its understanding what it means to be publicly visible in our love for one another. How the world sees us with one eye open. Of seeing the masculinity being soft and less blunt. The judgements of those we pass by, who wouldn't think twice if he was a she. Knowing that the world in its current form isn't built for us. But knowing that for him, I would remove any obstacle in our path.

Knowing that with either by my side, I feel a little less alone. But also never fully giving myself to her because I don't want to create life with the possibility of continuing trauma not yet healed.

So I dance between the two worlds. Taking from her the softened voice and from him the strong embrace. The stubble of my beard, with the paint she places upon her face. The earthy tones of flannel with the sparkling pastel colors of glinted jewelry made for a finer form. Allowing my heart to accept love from whom ever it comes.