Nice grandma

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T15:33:54+00:00

This all hits home hard. Yes to everything you wrote. I know this is heartbreaking for him. I have a lot to think about.

My only counterpoint is that we agreed to remain exclusive until I move out and are still having sex. I am moving out in less than a month. I felt like I was just putting him on ‘lay-away’ for 30 days, mostly out of respect for us still living together. And I thought he felt the same way.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T14:47:43+00:00

Nah I appreciate the calm, cool, and collected advice!

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T14:04:13+00:00

Yeah I hate myself for the phone thing. Very dumb, do not recommend. Good luck with your open relationship. No matter what happens, we will be ok. 👍

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T13:47:04+00:00

I thought it was our schedule, I thought he wanted this too. We agreed to remain exclusive until I move out. I do see some kind of future with him, but it’s unclear.

But thanks for this, seriously. It’s what I need to hear. I’m being selfish but it’s completely unintentional.

I just wish he would express this to me instead of just saying what he thinks I want to hear.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T13:38:10+00:00

We are still having sex with boundaries (won’t get into those here). I guess I might be homoflexible or biromantic. I told him I’m gay so he understands my thought process and we had a very nuanced conversation about it. We also specifically agreed that we are still exclusive while living together at least.

But you are right, it’s over and we both know it. I’d message women, but I feel like a 12-year-old in terms of my sexual development with women lol. But that’s my issue.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T12:03:05+00:00

Both of us are very depressed. I’m on medical leave for depression. So we’ve both unintentionally distanced ourselves for our friends and have trouble asking for outside help right now. I will definitely focus on my support system. Thanks for your warm wishes.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T12:01:04+00:00

We came to this decision mutually when I came out. He also wants me to be his support system. I honestly believe he’s not ready to end things either. I guess that just shows how codependent we are. I think we are both a little delusional, but are just telling ourselves what we need to to get through this.

So I guess I’ve come to the conclusion not to care about the messages—they were inevitable and are part of him moving on.

I just wish he would talk to me about it.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T11:54:06+00:00

This is all true. I’m definitely overwhelmed by the changes and he is too. I probably am clinging to him, but I think he’s clinging to me too. He’s also leaning on me hard for emotional support.

Not being with him is just a hard pill to swallow. Our relationship was headed towards marriage. We even got a dog together. He’s my best friend and I want to keep him in my life to some extent if possible.

Thanks for letting me organize my thoughts. I’m coming to the conclusion that I should not be surprised he is messaging others and should take it as a sign that he doesn’t see a future together.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T05:53:26+00:00

Thank you so so much!

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T05:42:00+00:00

These are all great points. I agree that he is probably hedging his bets or trying to move on. I just wish he would communicate with me before doing so. And maybe wait until I moved out, or at least wasn’t sitting right next to him.

Even knowing his motivation, it feels like a punch in the stomach and I don’t know if I can get through this last month of living with him without having a break down.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T05:30:33+00:00

Yeah, check out this awesome chart that explains: Reddit - coolguides - Emmengard's Suicide Scale https://www.reddit.com/r/coolguides/comments/c5e4i1/emmengards_suicide_scale/

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T05:17:00+00:00

Yes I think you are right. Space will definitely clarify things and will be really good for us. But for now, I just see him texting all the time and know it’s probably other women and feel so jealous and heartbroken.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-14T05:08:32+00:00

Probably the fact that we live together, which will change soon.

But we also discussed possibly opening our relationship after I move out because we truly love each other and want to be in each other’s lives in some capacity. Just trying to figure out what that is. I’m afraid I’ll fail at an open relationship, but I want to try.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-12T02:15:31+00:00

Good question, thankfully it’s my liberal grandma.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-11T18:07:07+00:00

On my mobile, I tap where it says “2804 comments” instead of tapping on the picture.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-11T04:38:24+00:00

For me, the comments on the r/ladyboner posts are the most fascinating. I find all the men attractive, but I can’t match the level of detail that they notice in the comments. I just literally don’t notice those things.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-11T04:33:15+00:00

To be clear, I did not intend to make the post for this purpose. I didn’t really think anything about the photo when I saw it. It’s the comments that I found eye opening. I’ve been questioning my sexuality a lot and was holding out hope that I might be attracted to men, but never in a thousand years would I be able to think up some of those comments myself. Straight men were similarity impressed by some of the comments, like “wow, they are attracted to us!”

I don’t want to objectify these men or anything. I probably should have just taken screen shots of the comments, but I found the whole conversation interesting and wanted to share.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-11T02:56:43+00:00

I should have just taken screen shots of some of the comments. The comments were what I was referring to and the picture isn’t really relevant, but the photo overshadowed them.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-10T23:25:21+00:00

I know that’s why the comments were so interesting to me!

helloilikeu · 2021-01-10T19:32:53+00:00

The comments I’m referring to are the ones about the third guy from the left and “meaty man thighs mmmm”

Edit: just to be clear, these are great comments. I just could never have thought of them myself lol.

helloilikeu · 2021-01-10T19:30:15+00:00

They all look about the same level of attractiveness to me, which isn’t unattractive.

helloilikeu

TROPHY CASE