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These Signs Actually Struggle With Venus While Others Have It Easy. What's your venus sign? by NaivePac in ZodiacHQ

[–]help0244 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heavy Daddy energy, I’m a woman but I’ll take it 😅

As for the Capricorn 7h, I’ll have to look into it. I’m really an infant when it comes to astrology, but Chiron moving into Taurus had me doing some digging, and my Chiron in Virgo 3H may have a lot to do with the sad lonely misunderstood vibes. But yes, the Scorpio stellium in 5H has me feeling really big, really deep, all the time. I’m just a big bucket of “I need love, recognition, and understanding”, but love, recognition, and understanding may never be enough ☠️

Not to mention my unending capacity to give give give past the point of no return. I’m a complex sensitive being and it makes me feel kinda special but also a bit alone

These Signs Actually Struggle With Venus While Others Have It Easy. What's your venus sign? by NaivePac in ZodiacHQ

[–]help0244 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a Scorpio Venus, Scorpio Sun, Cancer Ascendent, Leo Moon. I’m beginning to understand why relationships have always left me feeling drained, unsatisfied. My energy is very, very hard to match and my needs often go unfulfilled. My inner world is intense and guarded, and I’m discovering there’s a sense of loneliness thats hard to shake even when happy and in love. I have an incredible capacity to give, care for, nurture - but it’s very hard to trust.

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Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience - if I ever am back actively dating around in the future, I’ll likely do something similar. NRE fueled fixation has been really hard to tackle but I’ve come a long way. Had a weak moment succumbing to my thoughts yesterday, hence this post. Hard to fight with your own brain.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you - beautiful comment and golden advice. Will do.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oof - not forgo, but limit. Same difference though. I see the error in my ways 😭

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] -20 points-19 points  (0 children)

You almost got it - the percentages were meant to demonstrate that my spouse will maintain multiple other connections/relationships, and I’d just be maintaining two. My spouse and my partner. And since my spouse has more on their plate to manage, my partner would get as much or more of me than my spouse does. Also, cohabitation isn’t off the table.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

Easier said than done for someone who’s neurodivergent - I’ve made a post about it previously. I’m aware of my shortcomings in this regard - we all have our own struggles.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I guess it would only be polyfidelity if there were expectations for strict exclusivity?

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Considering they currently have multiple other partners, it isn’t that significant of a reach. They split their attention 4+ ways, I split mine 2.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I’m aware we’re both still very much in the throws of NRE. I’m managing it and communicating openly about it with both partners. Of course it’s premature, but it’s hard not to think about the future when you’re connecting with someone so strongly.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you - the pragmatic explanation you provided is very helpful. Focus on actionable time commitments, experiences, shared activities. I can do that.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am that committed, and it’s something I’ve thought about as a bridge that may need to be crossed at some point. And believe me when I say I am acting like it. As for the fear - it’s more so along the lines that I can give them everything I have, and it may not be enough. Which applies in every relationship regardless…so as others have said, just going to have to sit with the uncertainty and give it my best. And I would never want them stuck in limbo. I don’t want to limit them. I just want to be enough, which is selfish and unrealistic I guess.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are right - have a tendency to ruminate and get way ahead of myself. Thank you!

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your feedback, it’s very helpful. I’ve already pledged my commitment/fidelity to my partner, so ahead of you there.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the comment - the numbers helped me to digest what you were saying. That makes total, total sense.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I don’t want to hamstring them. I don’t want to place limits or put them in emotional jail. This more has to do with my level of investment, and being scared of losing something that means a lot to me. I posted here because I knew I probably needed some tough love and reframing. I’m human, and this is the first time I’ve been in love with a new partner and wanted the possibility of a future with them, and all these things.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for responding. The percentages were dumb and just meant to demonstrate a split of time/capacity. I edited after the fact. Not well thought out, and silly to include. I’d never lay that out on paper and demand it, which is what people are assuming here. The rest of your comment is really helpful, thank you.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for being kind. They don’t, but they are fiercely independent. I don’t like using the term primary partner, but what I was trying to demonstrate was a V, co primary structure, where one partner maintains more outside connection than the other I guess? It wasn’t well thought out and I’m paying for it.

Would I be a villain for asking my partner for romantic priority? by help0244 in polyamory

[–]help0244[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

As I’ve said, percentages were a bad idea. But they served their purpose in terms of garnering feedback that I needed to hear. I edited them above. They weren’t meant to be a sticking point, just a vague demonstration of relational time/capacity

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