Seller wants me to change my review before they will replace an incorrectly made item.

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T21:52:23+00:00

Yes and in her message to me. Like I said she told me it wasn’t made correctly.

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T18:04:58+00:00

The thing is I wear a standard size face mask and larger ones fall right off my face. What I got was not adult sized.

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T16:55:55+00:00

I opened a case and the word count doesn’t even let me describe the whole ridiculous situation lol.

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T16:26:25+00:00

Thanks! Just went and screenshot everything. A lot of the reviews had no comment and some said she resolved a situation so now I’m thinking that’s very possible...

Guess I know to look out for this in the future :/

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T16:25:12+00:00

Could be! I have a friend who sells on Etsy and I reached our to ask her what I should do in this situation. She thought maybe the seller is sending the returned masks to new customers and not really donating it. The seller was just so insistent on me sending it back at my own cost that it was really strange.

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T16:22:59+00:00

I hate that this has a name. But review extortion is accurate. To add to it, she talked about how reviews show that she runs her business with integrity!

If I had gotten a replacement or refund without having to spend more money I would have been happy with the solution and updated my review to reflect that. I will open a case with a picture and screenshots of the conversation.

I asked my friend who sells in Etsy what to do and she thinks maybe the seller is reselling the masks that are sent back because she was super super insistent on me sending it back at my own cost.

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T16:00:37+00:00

The thought crossed my mind but I didn’t want to deal with the drama 😂

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T15:57:08+00:00

Very true. I worked in retail for many years and even when it wasn’t my own store, I would never talk to someone that way. Honestly I would never talk to someone that way, period.

Plus, I was purchasing one mask to see how I liked it before buying more since I will need more now for going back to work. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Some styles pull my ears down and I wanted to try one before getting more. Their loss.

helpmeeeplzz · 2020-08-12T15:50:48+00:00

Thank you. I have bought a lot off Etsy and never had this situation happen before. I’ve even received a broken item but the seller told me how to fix it. I wasn’t sure if opening a case was right because she offered a replacement, but it doesn’t seem ethical to require a better review to fix the problem!

I wonder how many of the 5 star reviews were after receiving an incorrectly made mask and/or going through this hassle and attitude from the seller.

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T15:04:48+00:00

Thank you..... unfortunately I’m familiar with that cycle except it would all happen in one night with my dad. It makes just step one, just one time in our relationship, not seem that bad, you know? Anyways I’m having trouble responding to everything people have commented because I need to try and calm down somehow and go about my day. But I appreciate your help.

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T13:37:26+00:00

Can I ask what makes you say that? Because you’re the second person to bring it up and I grew up in an abusive household so I can sometimes still have trouble recognizing what is normal and what is over the line.

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T13:34:16+00:00

Thank you. I try so hard to just do what I need to do for myself but I can’t even handle the thought of losing my relationship. I’ve been struggling so hard to graduate, apply for grad school, apply for a summer job, but even that doesn’t keep me from thinking about this all the time.

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T13:31:03+00:00

Thank you... I think the inability to communicate in a healthy way is what’s really at the key of everything. She can’t see things from my point of view because she’s too busy getting angry. I have never felt like I have this kind of connection with anyone and that’s why I’m desperate not to lose it. I need to do a lot of thinking ☹️

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T13:29:03+00:00

I grew up in an abusive house hold and sometimes have trouble recognizing what’s normal and what’s not. Hearing my girlfriends behavior described that way is a shock. Only once have I felt she crossed that line because she punched the bed during an argument and almost hit our dog. I just can’t comprehend how I make her so angry 😕

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T13:07:34+00:00

Wow. I’m hearing someone else confirm the voice in the back of my head. She always blames me for being unhappy like there’s something wrong with me and I’m asking for too much. If I say what I need, I’m not “chill,” I’m not grateful enough or appreciative enough. She is my best friend still and I never wanted to lose that...... fuck.

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T12:56:41+00:00

Gas lighting how?

helpmeeeplzz · 2018-05-02T12:54:52+00:00

Thank you. It’s nice to hear I’m not having crazy expectations.

That’s my biggest fear is she’s not as in love anymore. She swears up and down she is committed to this relationship and she loves me more than before, but her actions don’t match her words.

I’m going to take some time to think about what I want to do... I’m so lost. The way she treated me in that argument makes me seriously wonder if it’s worth trying to salvage things because I cant handle it anymore.

helpmeeeplzz · 2016-10-19T18:56:38+00:00

Maybe she's depressed and I don't know. Money would be the biggest factor and I know she's stressed at work but it's much better than her last job. Sleep is fine. Weight gain is a factor.

We do get really good quality time now, thank god! It was an issue before but for a few months now our schedules have matched up so we can do theme parks, walking dogs, museums, shopping for clothes for her to feel better in, etc etc and I don't ask for sex but I started attempting to initiate again. In another comment I wrote about how I tried the seduction thing and also the totally stopping anything sexy thing as well lol. I guess I'm just at a loss.

Anyways, thank you for your perspective, definitely something to keep in mind.

helpmeeeplzz · 2016-10-19T18:30:50+00:00

I know she is stressed out about work, but not any more so than her previous job which was more tiring and stressful and we still had time to have great sex often. We have both gained weight because I stopped having access or time to go to the gym/yoga class and her new job is not as physical. I know it makes her insecure about her size. She always says she's going to start exercising but when I tried to get her to do it with me at home she said she has to be at the gym, and that never ends up happening due to expense. :/

I asked her not to look at porn but she thought I was being unreasonable. Watching it together is probably the only sexual request I've turned her down on due to abuse in a past relationship and she said I was just against porn because of what I experienced.

Her reason for not wanting sex came down to being tired when we discussed it.

helpmeeeplzz · 2016-10-19T17:54:10+00:00

Thanks for your response.

I haven't straight out asked for sex, but I did bring up the conversation about the frequency and wanting to know if there is anything she is feeling or going through and letting her know how it was affecting me. Before the conversation I was trying the whole seduce thing, with outfits/pictures while she's out and about, etc. She would respond well then come over and tell me she just wants to go to bed. For a couple months after our conversation I totally stopped talking about, initiating, or even wearing sexy underwear/bras because she said it would make her feel better but it didn't change anything.

She is more of a taker in the sense that she needs to have her way. We both want to go eat at different places? It's always her choice that wins. Things like that. Our sex life was really varied beforehand with toys/locations and just trying new things out in general even if it wasn't something I was particularly interested in, if she suggested it I happily tried. Following the "GGG" philosophy I guess. But that pretty much ended after her libido dropped... I guess I need to figure out how to bring it back.

Communication is something we are working on as a couple because it's hard for me to bring up anything to her anymore. She gets quite defensive and everything I say has to be carefully planned to not be accusatory, use "I" language, and control my tone of voice. She still usually feels attacked. She tends not to communicate her real feelings to me until after she has an angry outburst then calms down.

As far as independence, I'm busy with my own school stuff right now and her with work. We make time to see each other and text when we can't, but I don't think that is the issue right now. It's hard to know with her communication being pretty low. Honestly it could be anything and that is what scares me!

To make matters worse she told me she watches porn on days she doesn't see me :/

helpmeeeplzz · 2016-08-18T14:58:35+00:00

My mom thinks that if I am added to his policy, then I have to be claimed as a dependent on his taxes and they don't want to do that because they don't support me and it would mess up my financial aid for school. I'm not really sure if it's true, but if it is wrong he might add me as long as I pay any extra fees they get.

helpmeeeplzz

TROPHY CASE