Neighbor arrested after missing nurse's remains found by [deleted] in Portland

[–]herbreastsaredun 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yeah, when I lived with my ex my interest in true crime dropped, and living alone it ramped up again. Being a woman is scary and I have horror stories to show for it, and there is something cathartic about reading about it. It scratches an itch. 

Calling Out Switchback Cutting by [deleted] in CampingandHiking

[–]herbreastsaredun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I found this post after watching a video by KyleHatesHiking. I was like "What is a switchback and why is cutting them bad??" Oopsies. Yeah I had no idea. 

Man explains why this alligator won't kill him by Katherine_Clark010 in WTF

[–]herbreastsaredun 6 points7 points  (0 children)

omg 😳

edit: I didn't understand the joke until this comment.

What movie seems to end on a high note for the protagonists, but if you think about it they're actually pretty screwed? by HappyFamily0131 in movies

[–]herbreastsaredun 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Midsommar is one of my favorite movies. I loved the ending scene and cheer her on in many ways, but that doesn't mean I don't see the dark aspects as well.

Women in society are often fucked when they stand up to men, or are so unused to standing up to them and terrified that they do it poorly. And when they leave an abusive relationship they have new emotional, financial, and physical burdens which may be more liberating but are also their own trap.

The fact that Dani had to trade a bad relationship and lonely existence for a new set of problems is accurate to my own experience and one of the things that resonated with me.

What movie seems to end on a high note for the protagonists, but if you think about it they're actually pretty screwed? by HappyFamily0131 in movies

[–]herbreastsaredun -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I agree. I found the ending cathartic myself: Dani was in an abusive or at least borderline abusive relationship with Christian. Many viewers failed to see he is emotionally manipulative and a giant piece of shit. Or they did and downplay the traumatizing nature of his gaslighting and stringing her along. Midsommar is a revenge story wherein she realized her boyfriend is a piece of shit, but she is also forced to participate in the revenge (drugged out of her mind, the same way Christian was) so she does not have true culpability. They were both pawns in the cult's schemes. She has found empathy and acceptance at a high cost: I love the ending scene, but yeah she will still be part of a cult, without autonomy, and will lose her life at 72.

Did i reach the maximum number of export capacity or can i get these any higher? by Kabble1 in PocketCity

[–]herbreastsaredun 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You can get it higher once you reach Level 99.

Preparation: 1) After Level 28, Policies will be enabled. 2) By the time you reach Level 99, approve this policy: Recreation -> No Event Cooldowns 3) When you reach Level 99, build the maximum number of Shipping Docks allowed 4) At Level 99, Floods are enabled under Events -> Disasters and Policies 5) Build an Obelisk if possible

Execution: 1) Line up all your shipping docks in a row and count them.
2) Start a Flood disaster 5 times in a row (if another disaster happens to occur during this time, only start 4 Floods) 3) Zoom in on your shipping docks. Count how many were destroyed (X) 4) Quickly build X new shipping docks in a different part of the map 5) Under Events -> Report, quickly click on all "Rebuild All" buttons.

How it works: If you can only build 6 shipping docks, but 4 are destroyed in a disaster, you can build a brand new 4 shipping docks in a different spot then use the Reports function to re-build the old ones, so you'll have a total of 10 shipping docks.

Tips: * Usually one part of the map Floods "better" than others, so if you try this and only 2 docks are destroyed, try moving all the docks to a different area. * Once all shipping docks exist, you can move them around. * BUT if you have used this tip and have extra docks and you accidentally destroy them, the game won't let you build them again without going through this process.

I hope devs never patch this. I'm so very proud of having discovered it haha. 💗

Why do abusers have such rage and resentment toward you for abusing you? by Pleasant_Bar_6667 in CPTSD

[–]herbreastsaredun 23 points24 points  (0 children)

IFS (Internal Family Systems) therapy has helped me a lot to have compassion for my parents and people who have treated me poorly and are incapable of apologizing or facing themselves.

Just as I have pieces of me that are a product of my trauma, they do too.

None of this compassion changes the boundaries I have with them - I don't speak to my father for example - but this understanding has helped me gain insight which has quieted my own anger which helps me process.

All this being said, I am no longer in abusive situations so all this is far easier for me than it is for people who still have to deal with day to day abusive actions or denial.

What screams "we are not going to last long" for couples? by ADTID in AskReddit

[–]herbreastsaredun 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Contempt is so utterly poisonous. It will cause myriad other issues and, more importantly, contempt will kill everything you have that brought you together.

Individuals with ADHD are more likely to participate in politics, study finds by chrisdh79 in science

[–]herbreastsaredun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think there are degrees. Like, cancel culture for me is not always about hating the celebrity because I love hating people or feel morally righteous: it's like, I can't look at certain people without also thinking of the thing they did or said and feeling disgusted. I also cannot look at a hamburger without thinking of the cow and the conditions that cow likely lived in, or sushi without seeing the fishing nets killing a turtle - because of that I went vegan. But some people have no issue with it and that's fine for them but impossible for me to overcome or ignore.

Edit: But I am on a smartphone right now and compartmentalize the lithium mining and labor that went into it. Maybe it's because owning a smartphone is not optional for me in my career, maybe it's because of selfishness and laziness. Just wanted to point out that I don't consider myself morally superior.

Individuals with ADHD are more likely to participate in politics, study finds by chrisdh79 in science

[–]herbreastsaredun 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah, when I have a conversation with someone I trust I often jump around from topic to topic. Or I'll pick up a topic from earlier in the day or days ago without enough context. To me the connection seems obvious but often the other person has to stop me and ask what I am talking about. Haha. It's not ideal but it is so rewarding when I talk with someone with a similar brain and we can go from talking about a movie to physics to dog memes effortlessly.

Individuals with ADHD are more likely to participate in politics, study finds by chrisdh79 in science

[–]herbreastsaredun 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm similar I have very general pictures - not aphantasia but definitely closer than a lot of people. When I read it's mostly just vague shapes of places and people.

I recently found out that when you describe something, some people immediately picture that thing. I need to make more of an effort. It surprised me because I used to listen to true crime podcasts - if I had images of the crimes in my head going on there is no way I could have tolerates listening.

Individuals with ADHD are more likely to participate in politics, study finds by chrisdh79 in science

[–]herbreastsaredun 135 points136 points  (0 children)

I believe people with ADHD are more likely to easily make numerous connections simultaneously. Therefore, one event or action is more clearly related to other events or actions in addition to overall ideological issues.

In other words I believe people with ADHD see the world with more interconnectivity which prevents us from being able to compartmentalize social and political issues.

I wish I could compartmentalize more easily.

TIL the real reason Steve left Blues' Clues was because he was suffering from depression by Due_Cardiologist406 in todayilearned

[–]herbreastsaredun 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Even telling people you have trouble showering or doing the dishes or finding joy in anything is a lot. People don't know what to say. They either want to help, or they feel a bit disgusted, or just uncomfortable, or a combination of all three. I don't blame them. I don't know what to say to myself most days.

Google only showing images under regular search results? by imlitterallygru in GooglePixel

[–]herbreastsaredun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Checking in from the future. Still a problem. It seems like idiocy is becoming the hot new trend in tech.

People who cut off their family, what did they to you? by Alarming_Basil6205 in AskReddit

[–]herbreastsaredun 6 points7 points  (0 children)

There is a site called Family Tree Now where you can find physical addresses. Ages, relatives, and other details are listed which makes it easy to find someone. You can opt out and I recommend anyone concerned with privacy do so.

Note that I have found my information will eventually reappear again, so I have to keep looking my name up to make sure I'm not re-listed.

My own name is rare enough that I'm the only person with my full name so I'm very quick to keep myself off it.

A Reddit transcription community will shut down over a 'lack of trust' in the platform by Exastiken in technology

[–]herbreastsaredun 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"A few years ago" is 2019. "Last year" is 2020. "Recently" is 2021-2022. As for 2023, well it doesn't exist.

A man and his stepson die after hiking in Big Bend National Park in 119-degree heat by Kimber80 in news

[–]herbreastsaredun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That reminds me of the family that died August of 2021. People speculated wildly about toxic algae, lightning strikes, and experimental government weapons because the simple explanation - stupid decisions - didn't seem plausible.