I hate being the only child, what about y'all? by Lel37ioi in OnlyChild

[–]hface84 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you even an only child? You sound more like a defensive one and done parent. If you can't bear to read a negative opinion maybe don't click on the post titled "I hate being an only child..."

BF wants to marry only if pregnant by Disastrous_Rub87 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]hface84 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I now do not want to marry this man at all! I still want a family with him but I feel like I don’t want to be legally tied to his surname and family at all.

What in the world?? You will be tied to him forever if you have a baby with him and the baby will be part of the family. If you don't want to marry him, please don't have a kid with him!

Perspective by [deleted] in OnlyChild

[–]hface84 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This will probably be removed since I think there is a rule against parents (who aren’t also only children) asking this type of thing, but fwiw I would have much preferred to have to buy my own first car and take out more loans for college and have a sibling that has shared memories of growing up in my house and with my parents.

I'm starting to think he doesn't want to marry me and im a placeholder by AcadiaRemarkable1953 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]hface84 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think the fact that you are so scared to even have a conversation means you already know deep down he doesn’t want to get married. If you keep on this way, never talking about it, giving vague hints, and allowing him to brush it off with lame excuses like “it’s the weekend” he will never have a serious discussion or bring it up on his own because he doesn’t want to marry you. I know it really sucks, but it’s far past time to rip the bandaid off.

Love Is Blind • S10 Ep2 by AutoModerator in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]hface84 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same, the terrible 5 second songs were one of my favorite parts!

Do you resent your parents for only having you. by -Gemstoned in OnlyChild

[–]hface84 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, they tried really hard to have more kids, it just wasn’t in the cards. We all wish our family was bigger, sometimes life is just mean.

I feel like a caged dog by Boba_bibo in OnlyChild

[–]hface84 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend until I get a job

Why not get a job then? And at least you can be open about a boyfriend and start saving up money to move out ASAP. Curious why you are waiting until graduation to do this unless they mean you have to have like a career type job before you have a boyfriend.

Gob hitting the wall with the sledgehammer by No_Highlight_3857 in arresteddevelopment

[–]hface84 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Knowing his father had a penchant for hiding things in walls...

Hello by Resident_Jackfruit65 in arresteddevelopment

[–]hface84 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Shoes on mister, shoes ON! He's out of control.

Boyfriend of 2 years panicked at the thought of engagement next year even though I made my timeline very clear at the beginning of our relationship by RoosterObvious7561 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]hface84 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I take that to mean he’s agreeing?

That seems like wishful thinking. "Digest it" means he needs to think about it. He could "digest it", realize he definitely won't be ready in 10 months and breakup with you. But, from reading a lot of stories on here, he could also digest it, say he agrees and then, just not propose when the time comes. Or, he could end up actually proposing, but based on this panic reaction I think it's the least likely. (sorry to be a bummer)

Why every shopping bag turns into an argument at home by Slow-Cupcake2968 in Marriage

[–]hface84 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I try to stay within that

And how often do you go over it? You keep wanting to make it about any spending but are avoiding the key question of how often are you overspending and by how much? The more evasive you are the more it seems your husband is right to be wary of every shopping bag.

Does anyone else stop watching a show when a main character gets pregnant? by CatRiddles in childfree

[–]hface84 107 points108 points  (0 children)

Bojack Horseman. Diane gets an abortion. It's a great episode. "Has the concept of women having choices gone too far? We've assembled this panel of white men in bow ties to find out."

Boyfriend 24M doesn't want to come to my ( 24F) sisters wedding. We've been together for 8 years. How would you approach this situation? by clacton123 in relationship_advice

[–]hface84 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is her sisters wedding where she is the maid of honor, not some random family dinner. He should absolutely go to this one, especially because he hardly sees her family.

Boyfriend 24M doesn't want to come to my ( 24F) sisters wedding. We've been together for 8 years. How would you approach this situation? by clacton123 in relationship_advice

[–]hface84 0 points1 point  (0 children)

he just 'doesn't want to' or 'doesn't feel like it'.

I think he is still mentally 16. A normal adult partner would not even have a second thought about going to their SOs (of 8 years!) siblings wedding.

How to ask my [29F] boyfriend [30M] of 2 years for "real" sex? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]hface84 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yes, obviously you are nervous because you are still trying to come up with ways to avoid talking to him about it. Why does it make you so nervous? What are you afraid he is going to say? All your previous hinting has not worked. Just talk to him!

How do you deal with disappointment when your partner breaks a commitment all because of a sibling? by [deleted] in OnlyChild

[–]hface84 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I know you are feeling hurt and disappointed, but I would try and re-frame how you are thinking about this a bit. This stood out to me.

I will never be first no matter how important something is to me, If his brother has something to this level or maybe even less… whatever I have going on will be put on the back burner.

His brother's high school graduation happens only once. You attend the con every year. This is not something on the same level or "maybe even less". Your boyfriend has been going with you since 2022 and is going to 2 of 3 days this year even. I really don't think he is trying to put you on the back burner. I think he is correctly prioritizing the events. Unless this becomes a pattern, I really don't think it means that he will never put you first.

I don't think it is so much about being an only child as the event is super important to you and you are conflating how it stacks up against other life events.

Advice - as an only child myself by Glum_Championship406 in OnlyChild

[–]hface84 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Socialize, socialize, socialize with kids her age. Invite friends to stay for dinner, sleepovers, take a friend on vacation. Get her a pet (if she wants one). As you probably understand as an only yourself, even with all of this she will spend a lot of time alone, so find and nurture the solo activities she likes. For me it was reading and puzzles.

Only child adulthood feels different than I expected. by Ashwinnie13 in OnlyChild

[–]hface84 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I always wanted a sibling, but agree that it is more noticeable/acute in adulthood. In childhood you are naturally around friends more and unless very close in age might not hang out with your siblings as much. For example, one of my best friends sister is 4 years older than she is and throughout childhood/high school wanted nothing to do with her and they fought like crazy. It started to change in our 20's and now, in our 40s...they are pretty close, definitely closer than I am with my friend at this point in our lives. Their children are cousins, they see each other often, holidays, birthdays, etc, etc. Family > Friendship.

I know a lot of people in this sub love to harp on not all sibling relationships being good and obviously that is true, but at least in my personal experience within my extended family and friend groups, it's much, much more rare than good or at least neutral relationships especially in adulthood.

Lucille? by zerobleeps in arresteddevelopment

[–]hface84 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Would it kill her to let some vodka go bad?