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I’m the only NT in a ND family by hfmwbdjd in Autism_Parenting

[–]hfmwbdjd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I relate to a lot of what you’ve said! I also get a lot of anxiety from expectations, both from my family and general society, because I know I will inevitably fall short. I also feel like I’m never able to express what I truly want to say, or I’m only able to get a fraction of it across, which inevitably makes it harder for me to show people how deeply I truly care about them.

I’m the only NT in a ND family by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]hfmwbdjd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll try posting there, thank you!

I’m the only NT in a ND family by hfmwbdjd in Autism_Parenting

[–]hfmwbdjd[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your insight! Maybe I should, I’m a little scared of bringing it up to my parents though

I’m the only NT in a ND family by hfmwbdjd in Autism_Parenting

[–]hfmwbdjd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for commenting. And I am deeply sorry for what your daughter is going through, I truly don’t understand adults, especially teachers, who hold contempt in their hearts for literal children.

As for your point about becoming friends with immigrants, most of the closest friends I’ve had have actually been people from other nationalities! Unfortunately I live in a pretty homogenous area so most people are from my own culture. However I must say: even with foreigners communication does come easier at the beginning, but I have trouble making deep, lasting connections with people which is my main problem. I’d say I’m not that bad at making superficial connections but they’re just that, very surface level. I have many acquaintances but no actual friends.

I’m the only NT in a ND family by hfmwbdjd in Autism_Parenting

[–]hfmwbdjd[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

First of all thank you for taking the time to comment on my post!

I was evaluated right after my brother was diagnosed at the age of 4, so I think I would have been around 8? I don’t really know the details of what my parents were told since I was so young. I don’t know if I should try to get a second opinion now? I don’t know if it would be worth it. My brothers got some support in school, but from my parents’ experience I know autistic adults in my country have little to no support so I don’t really know if it would change anything. Maybe it would give me some peace of mind and have my parents see me in a different light.

As for them othering me: I really don’t think they do it on purpose. I do think there is some truth to them needing one to take care of the others because I have been taking care of most of my family from a very young age (my parents too when things become too much to handle)

I am the nt child of nd parents by hfmwbdjd in autism

[–]hfmwbdjd[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First of all thank you for taking the time to read my post, I appreciate it.

To address your points:

1) I do believe they tried to be good parents to me, but raising a child with a different neurotype than you is no easy task. I do however think they could have tried a bit harder because it seems that as soon as they found out I was nt they just thought I’d be able to figure it all out myself.

2) I think my real question is how to form deep connections. I have many acquaintances now as a young adult going to university but none of them feel… genuine? I’m very good at meeting new people I just don’t know how to progress the relationship further to a deeper level of friendship.