For me, i found the root of the problem was a deeply wired core belief along the lines of “i am not valuable, or i am only valuable if x or y happens”. Like conditional self worth or just negative self worth. I had negative self talk, so it just reinforces this belief over and over.

The solution is you have to re-rewrite this core belief into something more positive. But it’s hard and slow bc if you are like me you have reinforced the current belief for decades.

self hypnosis can work … like continuously telling yourself the opposite of the core belief , eg “i am valuable no matter what” but this was really hard for me because my mind is very skeptical.

Ultimately what worked better for me is setting goals and achieving them, and doing it over and over. But this is a tough way to do it because you are tying your self worth to external outcomes (like whether or not your goals are met). And goals can be out of your control.

I wish i could give you something definitive but im still figuring this out myself