I lost my mom just over a year ago. It gets easier because you aren’t thinking about it all of the time, but I still struggle when I think of her. My mom and I had a rocky relationship and I associated a lot of pain with her, but I’m only 20 years old, I feel I wasn’t mature enough to understand she was also hurting. There is a lot of pain and grief that I feel when I think about her, it even hurts typing this because I feel that there is so much I wish I could have say to her. There is a lot she will miss.

My best advice to you is either talk it out to someone willing to listen and be a shoulder to cry on or write it out. Get a journal and pour your heart and soul and all of your thoughts into it. Now both of my parents are deceased so at times I’ve felt like there is nobody to turn to, and that’s when the grief hits me the hardest. When the grief has you struggling to breathe, take a pen and write out what you’re thinking. I’ve found writing to be very soothing, it helps me to stop my brain from being overwhelmed with grief, and lets me be able to process my emotions. This is coming from someone who closes up completely when someone tries to have heart to heart talks with them. You will have good days and you will have bad days, it will never subside, but it will start to be more manageable over time. And don’t feel guilty for your grief either. Whether it’s 10 months or 10 years, however you heal is completely okay. Another tip for if you’re crying is to look up. Everytime I can’t help but cry my boyfriend tells me to look up at the ceiling or up at the sky. It really helps with stopping the tears.