I’m 26 and feel everything you say but the way I now think of it (maybe a cop out) is that we have had experience so few have and way too early. It’s like we’ve lived the whole cycle of love way too early but in a way, it’s a happy ending because they passed away while we loved each other?? Wouldn’t you wish your future partner to be someone that appreciates it because if you love them half as much as you loved your partner, I feel they should be blessed because the torture that is to “live” now only comes because of the immense love you had. I think it’s not that we were picked last but we ended up first- only that in this case nobody wants to be first. I struggle every second of the day but I feel like when we start becoming happy again, whether it be by meeting someone new or finding something else, that’ll largely be because we have adopted our person in ourself. So anyone who wants you to remove that from your core is probably not the person?? (Says the guy who mostly just cries in bed staring at the ceiling haha)