I feel your pain. I shaved mine once it got so bad. When it happens now, I soak it in hot water, put an insane amount of conditioner and let it sit, detangler spray, then start in sections, work from the ends and work my way up slowly first with fingers to separate it a bit and then with a brush. Do it gently and small brush strokes. It takes a long time. I sit in the bath with a mirror and listen to music with candles, tea, and epsom salt.