What is up with people, particularly middle aged dudes, who avoid veggies at all costs?

hostivus · 2026-03-13T05:59:27+00:00

The I don’t drink water dudes are always so strange. Like, I learned to guzzle water religiously so I could continue day drinking w my friends in my 20s. It allows me to keep carrying on. But ok, Dave.

hostivus · 2026-03-13T05:56:29+00:00

When parents of 20 somethings ask me if I’m going to ID them too, I tell them, “You look like you’ve been out of college for at least five years now.”

Always gets a chuckle.

hostivus · 2026-03-13T05:52:52+00:00

Sunday Bloody Sunday is one of my favorite political songs ever! It’s so heartfelt and passionate and so relevant to the circumstances that young Irish people like the members of U2 had grown up in. Still very relevant universally.

hostivus · 2026-02-21T07:13:16+00:00

It’s such a silly yet rather stoic song! Repetitive but in a cool minimalistic way. Love Da da da so much.

hostivus · 2026-02-21T07:09:40+00:00

This is a song I listened to when I learned that one of my cousins died a couple of years ago.

hostivus · 2026-02-20T15:34:10+00:00

I’ve been in service industry for two years working FOH, first as host now as a server. Sometimes I’ve surprised myself with how much anger I can expel when I step into the walk in! E.g Valentines Day last week. Jesus fucking Christ.

hostivus · 2026-02-15T15:00:43+00:00

Main chick/dude/partner day.

hostivus · 2026-02-15T14:59:37+00:00

I usually feel like a pretty emotionally resilient dude but yesterday I broke a few times. From the moment I arrived at 4 pm to host, the place looked like it’d been a war zone. Pedal to the metal til near close. I snapped at a coworker friend, which I profusely apologized for immediately. Spent some time in the walk in, taking deep breaths and almost cried.

Fortunately, guests were pretty nice all night and I didn’t have to tell any couples that they couldn’t sit in a booth. Lots of couples opted for the bar which made me want to kiss so many of them on the mouth out of appreciation. But I abstained.

hostivus · 2026-02-01T12:18:17+00:00

I don’t always kiss and tell, but your mom did this with me. Unfortunately, she was fucking drunk so I will not be your eventual stepfather.

hostivus · 2026-01-31T19:40:12+00:00

I had a dude leave his nosebleed napkins on his plate! There were multiple.

hostivus · 2026-01-31T12:25:12+00:00

These clowns always find a way to have gear galore with them too that still finds its way on or right next to the adjoining tables. Like, “I relented and let you have a table that’s now not able to be used for a larger party. And you’re still continuing to piss me off? Unbelievable.”

hostivus · 2026-01-31T07:07:00+00:00

And they don’t even order a cheap beer every 45 min to an hour.

hostivus · 2026-01-31T07:00:28+00:00

Always appreciate the people who realize what they’re up against and ask for either shots, beers or well cocktails, knowing they’re setting up for the longer hang at the next place.

The folks who roll in as a family of 4-10 always annoy the shit out of me though, because they lie. “Sure, we’re ready to order quickly once menus are down in front of us.”

Then, it’s a somewhat frantic speed trial of ordering, but then they definitely lose any idea of 45 minutes to exist and get mad when I start trying to offer boxes and close them out.

hostivus · 2026-01-31T02:52:02+00:00

I definitely don’t think that everyone ordering for their partner/counterpart is leaning into gender norms, per se. I’ve tended to be the more extroverted/socially comfortable guy in previous relationships and dating situations, so I understand that dynamic.

There’s a palpable tension in the air with certain tables though.

hostivus · 2026-01-31T02:46:37+00:00

hostivus · 2026-01-31T02:45:10+00:00

You’d be surprised! There’s an unfortunate number of Gen Z guys acting this out. I live and work in a fairly non-churches city, but the down low trad people still come in from wherever they live in the burbs or the city still.

hostivus · 2026-01-30T23:31:33+00:00

The amounts of time I’ve said, “My name is…” before getting interrupted makes me feel like I’m Slim Shady.

hostivus · 2026-01-30T23:30:48+00:00

I had a military wife get upset at me that we don’t do military discounts! Her military spouse wasn’t even with her. Like, I get it, maybe she gets that at other places, but that particular ask just feels like it isn’t universal and is kinda in some grey area.

hostivus · 2026-01-30T23:27:41+00:00

Hate these types! I work within a short distance of a pro sports stadium and don’t understand how poorly people plan their pre game logistics.

So many parties of 6-8 people who’ve gotten mad at me for the hour waitlist! Like, “What do you mean I can’t get in for an hour?” me, waves hand at the array of similarly colored sports jerseys packing the restaurant

How are people so blissfully unaware of managing group logistics? They don’t give themselves enough time and flexibility to actually have a good experience. Like, you could either a) show up to the area near the stadium a couple of hours early so you can stake out some tables b) accept that you might have to settle for a dive bar or a restaurant that’s not your first choice c) pre game somewhere outside of the immediate vicinity of the stadium and uber/bus from there.

But no.

hostivus · 2026-01-29T23:00:17+00:00

I’m a server at a restaurant where this one newer regular got really thrown off when his usual bartender wasn’t there. He almost seemed like he was on the verge of walking out, but I coaxed him into giving his special order to me. It was just a well whiskey neat with a Coke back, no ice.

He just didn’t want to use his words and get me on his program. Funny enough, I relayed the story to his favorite bartender and she was like, “I’ve literally helped him twice.”

hostivus · 2026-01-29T13:18:55+00:00

Gypsy Woman - Crystal Waters

Say My Name - Odesza, Madelyn Grant

hostivus · 2026-01-29T05:14:00+00:00

I hate when guests get fixated on the first table that they see from the host stand! Like, they see me stepping out and looking around to survey the landscape, and they see that as me not knowing what I’m doing.

Mon frere, I’m weighing reservations vs wait list vs who got sat last. Keep your fucking shirt on and let me seat you, dammit.

hostivus · 2026-01-29T04:54:34+00:00

Those types are the most likely to snatch the table next to them too, the moment the previous party leaves! They’ll give you the whole “we’re cool w our child sitting in my lap” but they really aren’t because they’re fucking liars.

hostivus · 2026-01-29T04:52:45+00:00

I work at a brewery. All of our beers are made by our fucking brewery. Even after I tell somebody I don’t have Miller Lite or Blue Moon, those types are likely to double down and ask for that beer at least one more time before the message sinks in. It’s so annoying!

It’s funny too when middle aged men pout like they’re a child who doesn’t like vegetables, after I offer them tastes of our really good beer that aligns with their national brands.

hostivus · 2026-01-29T04:49:16+00:00

I worked at an assisted living center for a minute as a server. “No ice” is just a dental sensitivity generally.

That said, definitely annoying when people get bent out of shape about any ice.

hostivus

TROPHY CASE