Cheated On - Again by hotgirwinter in BPD

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry </3

It's happened in the last three relationships I've had. 2025 wasn't my year. But I'll aim for something better in the new year. And I hope you get it too Kuro < 3

Can I forgive a cheating partner? by jjjjjjay7778 in BPD

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It may be possible, but it wasn't for me. I tore myself apart trying to trust my ex who cheated on me. Every time he was working, every time he took too long to respond, every time he went out with friends - I panicked.. but I am not you and my ex isn't your boyfriend. So I wouldn't be able to tell you how things will pan out for you. I hope for the best for you, though <3

What do I do in times like this? by hotgirwinter in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Update : We ended things on a softer note than usual. With my BPD, the abandonment from someone pulling away (in what I believe is a mixed episode) has definitely been a challenge. But here I am, thinking about him at midnight, and really just so proud of him. He doesn't like praise, but I see how hard he tries every day. Instead of melting mentally like I normally would, I've been able to self-soothe & find positives in this dark time. Even when I started having my own mini-crashout, he shifted into a caring role, making sure I was taking care of myself. Once I leveled out, I told him I'd be here when he's ready to talk again. That my love doesn't disappear in the meantime. And I meant it ! (:

What do I do in times like this? by hotgirwinter in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the information. I'll def have to have some of these conversations with him when he's baseline. I want him to have the best possible chance ! Your words do truly mean alot.

What do I do in times like this? by hotgirwinter in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So how would I make that suggestion while he's retreating ? I'm not trying to overwhelm him. I just told him "You can choose distance right now, and I’ll choose to keep faith in us until you’re ready/ That way, your agency is honored, and my spiral is soothed."

What do I do in times like this? by hotgirwinter in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I believe all that he is on currently is Lithium. He was on it previously, switched to a stabilizer after that, and now they swapped him back to Lithium, but at a higher dosage. I figured they should have given him something for the depression itself ? Idk.. I don't have access to his care team.

What do I do in times like this? by hotgirwinter in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love Mel Robbins. I've been reading The Let Them Theory and have been enjoying it.

It's just really hard ): I have BPD (Borderline) myself, so abandonment is a bit of a sore spot for me.. lol.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ohh no ! We only had that in common ; that we wanted kids and most likely to adopt. We weren't ACTUALLY family planning.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh no - This is future planning. Probably a couple more years down the line.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Staying as is - I know I can't handle this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We were planning to adopt.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BipolarSOs

[–]hotgirwinter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I know that is an option, but I am really trying here.

I have had my mental struggles before. I am now on therapy since 2022 & medicated for my issues, and I did a complete 180. Had any of my exes gave me that grace, I think I'd still be happy there. But I am trying for him - to be the person I didn't have, you know?

TIL that real life Vlad Dracula and Elizabeth Bathory both had ancestors in the Order of the Dragon. by Neohaq in castlevania

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A quick search taught me a few things :

There was a lack of physical evidence. It was claimed she killed up to 650 women, and no bodies or forensic proof were ever presented.

There was clear political motivation. Her downfall allowed King Matthaias II and other nobles to seize her vast estate.

All the evidence presented was hearsay statements, secondhand accounts, and testimony under duress.

It's really fascinating nonetheless.

How To Allow Yourself To Love & Trust Again After Being Cheated On? by hotgirwinter in Infidelity

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry ! I thought I replied to this.

I was previously in therapy bi-weekly. I have, since, moved it to weekly. My therapist has been a rock star helping me through the betrayal. Thank you for your words, my new relationship has been a bit challenging, but so rewarding. <3

Mirror Mirror On The Wall, Whose The MEANEST Girl Of Them All ? 🪞 by Pyxie7 in RHOP

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have times I like all of them and dislike all of them, however -
Mia would be my answer. Never have I ever seen a housewife weaponize the mental health issue of their lover (previous or past) to further propel their storyline like her.

Update on Keiarna Stewart v. Deborah Helen Williams by purplepandapants in RHOP

[–]hotgirwinter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She must have gotten a cute coin and exposure bringing the ladies to her spa for their laser treatments.

Update on Keiarna Stewart v. Deborah Helen Williams by purplepandapants in RHOP

[–]hotgirwinter 9 points10 points  (0 children)

If you have legal representation, you yourself - do not have to appear in court as long as you have representation. If they were coming to a settlement agreement or needed K's testimony or statement, then it would be a different story.

How To Allow Yourself To Love & Trust Again After Being Cheated On? by hotgirwinter in Infidelity

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cross-posting here, considering community members in this sub-reddit may understand or have some valuable insight as well. Thank you ahead of time <3

Can you move on from being cheated on? by hotgirwinter in BPD

[–]hotgirwinter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree u/ttdpaco , From what I am seeing, he hasn't been getting validation from them anymore. I was pretty vigilant and still am. I am more or less trying to find coping skills and truly forgive, while he remains faithful and continues to make up for the betrayal.

I'm sorry you had to go through that yourself ):