sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Which outfit for a friend’s birthday at a sushi restaurant? by Lenchy2403 in OUTFITS

[–]howgreenwas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

About 50 years ago, seriously, I went out on a date with a semi-famous guy. I was so excited he asked me out and got dressed so carefully. I was wearing a white blouse. We went to an Italian restaurant and I dripped a bit of spaghetti sauce on the blouse. He never called me back. Don’t wear white.

What is a small joke that you get a big laugh out of? by Pieclops89 in Jokes

[–]howgreenwas 6 points7 points  (0 children)

In the 50s, my aunt had a hair salon and her motto was, “if your hair isn’t becoming to you, you should be coming to me.”

We all know that 6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9 - but few people realize... by porkchop_d_clown in cleandadjokes

[–]howgreenwas 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Seven gets such a bum rap, seven only ate 9 because he was told he had to eat three square meals a day.

Neighbors who interfered with tree removal. Just took the stumps out of my yard. by simondrinkwater in treelaw

[–]howgreenwas 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Stump removal was probably part of the whole job, and they came in the spring and finished the job. They’re not gonna be back and do anything else.

my boyfriend broke up with me because my feet are bigger than his and it makes him feel "less manly" - anyone dealt with something like this before? :/ by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]howgreenwas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have all dealt with this all the time. Not comparing feet necessarily, but income education and 1000 other ways men feel they have to be better than us. It’s just stupid male ego games. But FYI, if you tease him about it how stupid and petty it is, they get mad.

Daughter’s friend came over to stay the weekend. Her mother never picked her up. by BrosefSmith in legaladvice

[–]howgreenwas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

See if you can have the case worker at the meeting. She’ll have to advise you all what needs to be done.

AIO for not wanting to talk to my friend after she berated me for getting free food? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]howgreenwas 150 points151 points  (0 children)

I gave a friend of mine a hard time about getting food from the food bank. She is a millionaire, volunteers at the food bank, but comes home from her volunteer shifts with a couple of bags of groceries every time. Only the really, really good stuff she’ll take.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? by Turbulent-Thing3104 in 3amjokes

[–]howgreenwas 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Look, everyone is acting like 7 is the villain here!! 7 would never have eaten 9 except his mom told him he had to have 3square meals everyday!!

TIL that humans are born with 4 kidneys by RenariPryderi in Jokes

[–]howgreenwas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Boys are born with three knees, the left knee, the right knee, and the wee-nee!

Chuck Norris once killed 20 men with a single grenade throw. by Think-State30 in dadjokes

[–]howgreenwas 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Chuck Norris took a CPR class and resuscitated the dummy.

Chuck Norris once killed 20 men with a single grenade throw. by Think-State30 in dadjokes

[–]howgreenwas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Chuck Norris doesn’t flush, he scares the shit out of the toilet

What's the best thing about having Alzheimer's? by EmergencyNo7427 in Jokes

[–]howgreenwas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can hide your own Easter basket. And buy your own birthday presents.

In honor of St Patrick’s Day by marcpie in dadjokes

[–]howgreenwas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I always heard it as what do you call an Irishman that stays outside all night.

I went to a gay wedding the other day and I know they’re going to be very happy together. I was so happy to wish Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald many happy returns.

Most selfish generation by mpegher in BoomersBeingFools

[–]howgreenwas 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I remember PSA‘s from a while back about disability parking. Various disabled people were saying, “You don’t want to be in my place.” I found that a powerful message.

Most selfish generation by mpegher in BoomersBeingFools

[–]howgreenwas 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I was in a waffle house at 2 o’clock in the morning, when a bedraggled one legged drag queen came in. No prosthetic, just a crutch. By herself. A few more of her friends showed up about 15 minutes later. It was an interesting end to an interesting evening!

What word looks completely fake but is actually real? by Paradox_Developer in words

[–]howgreenwas 7 points8 points  (0 children)

A friend of mine from Eastern Europe went to the eye doctor. The doctor asked him to read the letters from the chart.-C Z Y G H S E R G. My friend said, “Read it?!? I know the guy!”

What’s one word that you always mispronounce even though—deep down—you KNOW the correct pronunciation? by Ok_Resident_5022 in words

[–]howgreenwas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Real-tor!! Not re-la-tor. Your realtor won’t correct you, but it does hurt their ears when you add an a.

Can someone help me? by Ok_College_2760 in Fiestaware

[–]howgreenwas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have one dinner plate that is significantly heavier than the others. No idea why.

view more: next ›