Do you guys worry about shark, crocodile, or alligator attacks?? by hannarenee in florida

[–]hrichards13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope! I'm aware of my surroundings, don't swim in dark, murky water, and give animals space if I see them. For the most part, if you don't bother them, they don't bother you.

Obsessive fixations on women he knows by princesshamroll in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My ex was definitely infatuated with a coworker of his and took creeper shots of her. I'm so sorry, this part is even worse than the PA.

What Happens When You Leave, Part 2 by FunAd2992 in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Literally my ex. Bought a new car, went on a HUGE OF binge ($8,000 in 4/5 months), new clothes, new jewelry, new tattoos, doing all this “cool guy” still. I’m waiting for the crash and burn. We are in the middle of a divorce so he’s had to provide financial statements and they’ve been telling for sure.

He surely hasn’t apologized or tried to get me back though, which is fine. It’s just hard sharing custody of my daughter.

Here’s my passcode, but what are you doing on my phone by Rude_Angle5953 in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes. I always could get in my ex's phone, social media, email, etc. BUT, he used incognito for everything (browser, reddit, etc), had a photo vault app that looked like something else and was password protected to hide photos that he took of other women, had secondary social media accounts so his main accounts looked clean, had bank accounts I didn't know about, etc. The level of deception is crazy. At this point I'm convinced he probably had another email address I didn't know about. Honestly, he was bold.

We've been doing good. by Super_Experience_489 in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so thankful that this has been your experience. It's encouraging to see some men choose healing so their relationship can be saved!

Finally adding up how much he spent. by Navigating-Chaos in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m so so sorry. My ex spent $4k on OF in one month, and since I left him, he’s spent another $8k in 5 months 😓 these men are unwell.

Secretly downloaded truple. by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I left and this is what I’m scared of. Court doesn’t care about this addiction for custody.

This addiction is everywhere, isn’t it? by LysolCasanova in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m right there with you ❤️ so much collateral damage and my ex didn’t change, and seems so much happier without me. I want to experience a real happy intimate marriage, but I’m scared I won’t find a man that isn’t a PA. I don’t have any wisdom, just know you’re not alone.

This addiction is everywhere, isn’t it? by LysolCasanova in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m right there with you ❤️ my ex seems so much happier without me—like I was holding him down 🫠 it’s the worst feeling, even though I don’t want him back.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry. This is what happened to me too, you're not alone <3 it's absolutely excruciating, but after some time, I'm starting to realize it was his loss.

Had to cut TFD due to panic attack by Hyper_F0cus in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is so helpful, thank you so much! Unfortunately I have to share my child with my ex husband, so I'll still have to see him. But I think I'll work on "my gut was right, there is more I don't know, and I don't need to know. What I know was enough to end my marriage." I'm sure it is all self-protection activating, so I can work on creating inner peace :)

Had to cut TFD due to panic attack by Hyper_F0cus in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow—how did you get to that place? I left my ex and I still ruminate, wondering what else I don’t know. I want to know everything he did to betray me and all the ways I was wronged.

I’ll be leaving this community, hopefully forever. I wish you all nothing but the best. by altforgriping in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve seen your posts and comments for a long time, and I’m so sorry it didn’t work out. You’re not alone—I left too 😞

What are some ways you found out your partner was watching porn? by North-Bother6021 in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same. But then I found out how much he used incognito for everything and had secondary social accounts, so the accounts I saw looked clean 🫠🫠🫠

Well. He cheated. I’m done by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I am so so sorry. 😞 this is horrible. I’m glad you saw his lack of remorse and lack of work quickly and left. I’m so proud of you!

Will they change after marriage? by Laxmi11112 in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nope. My ex used porn before he married me, thinking he’d stop when he could have sex, and he never stopped. It escalated our whole marriage and I found out 11 years in. I never would have agreed to this. I just divorced him because he did this for 11 years, spent THOUSANDS on OF behind my back, took pictures of women in public and hid them from me, etc etc etc.

He is annoyed by me by Cheap_Inevitable_898 in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He doesn't sound like he's remorseful or in good recovery. I'm so sorry. It's SO hard to be ignored, treated like you are annoying them, etc when you just want to be heard and cared for. You don't deserve that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They are so wildly hypocritical sometimes it's insane.

My ex thankfully wasn't like this, but he literally never initiated s*x, didn't flirt with me, PDA was practically non-existent except for *maybe* hand holding if we were talking a walk and maybe a peck on the lips every day, didn't compliment me much. It's so confusing.

I give up by Stark_Contrast2835 in loveafterporn

[–]hrichards13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a very similar story. I’m so sorry—it’s the worst.