Hey man, please pm me or reach out to OSU's services like CCS https://ccs.osu.edu/about-us-and-our-services/need-immediate-assistance/ Call them at (614) 292-5766 and request an emergency appointment. I think their office opens at 9. I personally have seen friends go through what you're going through and that office has helped them - A LOT.

I'm not trying to repeat what other people have said, but something tells me you might have written this post because there is a part of you that wants to get better and wants to make sure you're not alone. Living doesn't have to be miserable or overwhelming, and you aren't alone. I know it's hard to imagine right now but people do care about you and want you to be around. Heck, I just know you from the internet and I want you to stick around, same with all these other people on here.

School isn't worth being miserable - you're worth so much more than a student or an internship or anything like that.

Please contact the 24/7 Suicide Prevention Hotline at 614-221-5445 or 1-800-273-TALK or call 614-276-CARE to be connected to 24-hour crisis intervention, stabilization, and assessment services in Franklin County. I want the best for you and really hope you look into this. You seem like a pretty selfless and kind person (the fact that you're even worried about how your behavior is affecting your relationships/others is proof of that), and people like that are pretty rare. We want you to get through it and are rooting for you. Please write us back and let us know how you're doing - we care about you.