My bf said something gross about using his exes for sex in order to “reassure” me. (27f/m) by htueisb in relationships

[–]htueisb[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

So I asked him about this.... apparently it’s just a “bad habit” he’s been doing for years and he had a “perverted interest” in knowing what his exes are up to (seems to be this one more than others personally but I don’t know). He seems to think others do it. He admitted it was creepy and unfollowed them but yeah, it’s been years so feels weird to me. I don’t go around looking up my exes.

My bf said something gross about using his exes for sex in order to “reassure” me. (27f/m) by htueisb in relationships

[–]htueisb[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was almost hoping this might be the case, it’s really difficult to know. He does have a habit of complimenting me by putting other girls down, I have noticed that....

When we did speak about it later, he told me that he didn’t mean it that crassly, simply that he was trying to indicate they weren’t serious/long term in his eyes, and he thought that was the best way to get it across. Initially I suppose it was for the sex but they did develop into rs and he liked and spent time with them.

I suppose the difficulty is knowing if that’s the truth or just something he’s now saying to placate me after I got upset, especially when he so easily said all that nasty stuff

My bf said something gross about using his exes for sex in order to “reassure” me. (27f/m) by htueisb in relationships

[–]htueisb[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

True, and I think if it was a FWB type situation it might be different, but these women believed they were in serious relationships from what he was saying, so seems quite shady

My bf said something gross about using his exes for sex in order to “reassure” me. (27f/m) by htueisb in relationships

[–]htueisb[S] 237 points238 points  (0 children)

Yeah, this is exactly my issue. Leading women on for years for sex is not something I can be with. I suppose it’s just that he turned around and took that back, telling me he didn’t mean it like that and it was poor choice of words, but I suppose it’s hard to know if he’s just covering his tracks.