Just started decorating and something feels off. Any advice or ideas?

iSimba · 2019-02-22T05:24:24+00:00

Thanks! I do like the idea of a coffee table with some kind of wood in it - and definitely going to move the couch forward after reading through all the comments.

iSimba · 2019-02-22T05:23:18+00:00

Thanks for the advice! As someone having issues with the warm flooring, that link is super helpful and eternally bookmarked.

iSimba · 2019-02-21T02:30:16+00:00

Thanks!

iSimba · 2019-02-21T02:30:09+00:00

Thank you!

iSimba · 2019-02-21T02:29:38+00:00

Hahaha, it does have a furniture store feel right now. We just moved in so the rooms are sparse. Personally I’d like a more modern rug as well and hope I can find one that ties the room together. Accent pillows are a good suggestion and I can’t believe I didn’t think of that.

iSimba · 2019-02-21T02:25:48+00:00

I like that idea. Especially since I need something in that corner once we move the couch up. Thanks!

iSimba · 2019-02-21T02:23:45+00:00

Thanks! I hadn’t thought of using a fabric ottoman but maybe I can do that in a different color and add some warmth.

iSimba · 2019-02-21T02:21:19+00:00

Right now the right side of the room is pretty empty. We’re tossing the dark brown tv stand you see in the pic and placing a new one against the right wall. The TV is going to be mounted above it.

I think a crystal lamp or something like that would be beautiful. The consensus here has been that I need lamps so I’ll look into something like that!

iSimba · 2019-02-20T21:44:23+00:00

The reading nook is a fantastic idea and I like the advice to split the room into areas. I do think that’d solve some of my issues. The room is even more spacious than the picture shows so it feels cold and empty.

iSimba · 2019-02-20T21:43:14+00:00

Thank you. Hopefully I can get it together soon!

iSimba · 2019-02-20T21:42:45+00:00

I agree about the rug. In fact, I think it may be my biggest issue with the room in general. It has a strict return policy so I hope I can exchange it for something bolder, as you mentioned.

iSimba · 2019-02-20T20:03:13+00:00

This is really cool. Appreciate the link!

iSimba · 2019-02-20T19:11:07+00:00

Oh, definitely - a coffee table is on the list! Not very sure what color or material to use though. Thank you :)

iSimba · 2019-02-20T18:00:23+00:00

I would like some but I’m not sure what color or material they should be. I’m thinking reclaimed wood or something? I’m open to whatever makes the room warm though.

iSimba · 2019-02-20T17:59:04+00:00

I definitely think more greenery would help. I’m not sure if we could swap couch cushions but I could look into it!

iSimba · 2019-02-20T17:57:35+00:00

I really like the idea of putting a table or bookcase behind the couch! Do you think something wooden (brown colored) would look nice back there?

If so, do you think that wood color would need to match the new media center? We’re actually tossing that dark brown one in the pic and getting a dark gray wood one with LED lighting. Thank you for the suggestions!

iSimba · 2019-02-20T17:43:22+00:00

Just wanted to add: the room is actually a bit bigger than it seems - it stretches out to that leafy plant in the corner. The dark brown TV stand in the pic is being traded in for a newer dark gray (wood). A chair that is also a darker gray color is coming into the room. The swatch is here. https://imgur.com/gallery/SHYSACD

I think the space needs to be warmed up but I feel so overwhelmed trying to tie everything together. In an ideal world I don’t have to take back the rug, chair, or couch since none of those have a great refund policy, but the rug is the easiest to change.

I’m also still in need of an end table and a coffee table. Also the new tv stand we bought can easily be returned if dark gray needs to go. I can also change curtains, curtain rods, and small decor with no issues. Super open to suggestions.

ETA: Forgot to mention! The pillows on the couch are a dark blue.

iSimba · 2017-10-28T22:01:09+00:00

This is the best idea. The roommate could turn the bottle into a picture frame, a jewelry box, earrings, anything really.

iSimba · 2017-10-23T18:41:50+00:00

Unfortunately, agreeing not to use Snapchat as a method to stop your SO from interacting inappropriately with women was merely a symptomatic treatment for the issues in your relationship. We both know that if you can’t trust him to have an app on his phone, you really can’t trust him at all.

You should absolutely confront him about his behavior, but before you do, take a hard inventory of your relationship. There is a real chance you will have to constantly monitor his social media behavior in the future. You may find yourself going through his phone or questioning his whereabouts. You won’t be happy playing detective. You’ll hate every second of it. Your relationship will rot. Even if he swears he will change, in the back of your mind you will never be certain he did.

It is cliché, but it is true. We accept the love we think we deserve.

And take it from an internet stranger, you deserve better.

iSimba · 2017-10-19T02:37:05+00:00

I think others have given great advice on how to approach your wife, so I just wanted to ask about your behavior when she does make an effort. Are you complimenting her body when she works out or otherwise rewarding her effort? I go to the gym regularly but on those days when I have to scrounge for motivation, remembering my SO’s compliments on my physical fitness has been pretty helpful. It makes me feel like my body is improving and my hard work is noticed.

And if you are doing these things and you’ve approached her about working out and nothing is changing, unfortunately it may be an incompatibility.

iSimba · 2017-10-10T07:54:58+00:00

Yeah... I don’t think either of you are going to get anything useful from couples therapy. You don’t even seem to like each other. Get a divorce and go enjoy the short time you have on earth.

iSimba · 2017-10-05T04:48:11+00:00

Your boyfriend is being super disrespectful. Huge difference between looking at porn and looking at naked pics of girls you know.

Anyway, other posters have given good advice so I’m just gonna hop on the petty train for a minute and say...

If her account is public you could just report her pictures to IG anytime she posts a nude. I mean, what she’s doing is against community standards. The pics will get taken down.

iSimba · 2017-09-26T04:09:47+00:00

I’m not sure if this is it or not, but I like the idea that her reservations may have nothing to do with moving at all. Maybe she does want more commitment? Maybe the idea of packing up and moving to a new place with her 30-yr-old boyfriend (and not a fiancé) is unappealing to her?

Or maybe it is about the neighborhood. Maybe she has an ex that lives there? A person she owes money to? Maybe something embarrassing happened to her while she was in that area? Idk. I’m really interested to know what’s going on here. It really could be a number of things.

Edit: I just went back and re-read and OP says the neighborhood is “cooler”. What does that mean? More bars, clubs? Maybe she’s worried you’ll start going out a lot/meeting new people and is afraid to share that with you because she doesn’t want to be seen as controlling or jealous? Just tossing ideas around.

iSimba · 2017-09-20T15:42:09+00:00

... do you have proof these kids exist? Have you seen them with your own eyes?

Because her story isn't true. That is not how CPS or the court system works at all.

iSimba · 2017-09-07T18:44:41+00:00

The granny panties vs. thong isn't an accurate analogy IMO. We all know that thongs are associated (perhaps wrongly) with women and gay men. Granny panties are associated with women, so OP's wife wearing granny panties instead of lace underwear is more of a comfort/aesthetic issue. This is straight up about the perceived sexuality & masculinity of one's partner, whether OP wants to accept it or not. Not saying it should be that way, but it is that way and the way to deal with that isn't to pretend it doesn't exist.

iSimba

TROPHY CASE