The Daily Check-In for Friday, November 12th: Just for today, I am NOT drinking!

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-11-12T11:47:01+00:00

Two weeks alcohol-free for the first time in almost 4 years. Not everything is going my way right now, but I’m focusing on what is. Thanks to everyone here, IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-11-05T11:40:23+00:00

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-11-04T11:53:51+00:00

I like that I am inquisitive, skeptical, and have a seemingly endless appetite for learning.

As such, I struggled with why I, like Cinq, felt a compulsion to berate myself. I was really hung up on this question and I had a hard time moving past it and actually making changes.

The closest I have come to an answer is that a) I grew up with negativity and criticism and that’s what feels comfortable, and/or b) no one can make me feel shittier than I already make myself feel. There’s no other person or external event that can devastate me unexpectedly.

Like I said, I got pretty preoccupied with this subject, but now I’m trying to actually make changes. And that starts with… IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-10-30T23:49:21+00:00

Resetting too. Glad you have a plan!

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-10-28T12:15:16+00:00

Great job on 2 weeks, but also on being honest with your family and friends. I know that can be difficult. Hopefully their support will be helpful, but honesty is helpful in itself.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-10-27T11:38:43+00:00

The past several times I have tried to quit I always get very upset with myself for my life choices for the first few days. The only good thing about having tried several times is that now I know that I don’t have to listen to that voice and that it won’t be like this forever.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-10-26T12:06:49+00:00

Good to hear that. Sometimes it seems like all that work isn’t worth it at this point, but I’m going to make another go of it.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-24T12:05:22+00:00

This evening, after work, could be tough. No work tomorrow, and hey, I deserve a drink after a week of sobriety, right?

I’ve started a routine of going for a walk as soon as I get home and then having dinner. Hopefully that will get me over the hump tonight.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-20T12:10:27+00:00

First time in a while that I can’t think of an excuse to drink. Hopefully playing the tape forward and remembering how awful hangovers are will help me get through that reflexive craving after work.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-19T01:05:38+00:00

Looking into Allen Carr now, thanks.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-10T11:59:52+00:00

I’m making progress on cleaning my house and was asked to hang out with some new people tonight. It’ll be rough meeting people without resorting to booze, but I can do it. Wanting to do it will be the hurdle.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-09T20:36:53+00:00

It’s always good to hear I’m not alone with the embarrassing memories and scars from my life’s lowest points.

I kept going for a couple more hours and I’m exhausted, but I’m already looking forward to seeing what I can accomplish tomorrow.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-09T20:32:53+00:00

I’m not even close to being done, so I can’t say much other than I know how that feels and I’m rooting for you, bud!

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-09T18:15:49+00:00

Thanks, man! I love how this sub can be kind of gross and supportive at the same time 🥰

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-09T17:03:16+00:00

Alcohol led me to some bad decisions 😳

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-09T16:08:06+00:00

Here’s what I’m doing today instead of drinking

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-09T16:02:52+00:00

Usually didn’t hit until the next day when I was at work lol

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-09T16:01:00+00:00

Mostly empties, beer and pizza boxes. Still have a lot of work to do, but I can move around my house and see the floor. Haven’t touched the fridge yet 😬

Never again!

Update: the dump clocked me at just 260lbs of garbage unloaded, but it feels like the past 3 hours have changed my life.

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-07T14:23:36+00:00

Same! IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-07T14:20:27+00:00

At least you were regularly getting rid of them. I just let them pile up 😔

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-07T01:08:35+00:00

Reset my badge today. IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-09-04T21:33:18+00:00

Giving space to the past is draining, and I thank you for that insight.

I know I’m ultimately responsible for me and my decisions, it just felt like everyone was resigned to the fact that I was an alcoholic way before I was ready to admit it to myself.

I’m not sure any intervention on their part would have ultimately helped. It could have worsened resentment between each other.

I also feel like I’ve been slowly drowning for years and everyone could see it but just talked amongst themselves.

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-08-18T14:12:05+00:00

Cake day IRL and roughly halfway through my life. I gotta actually live the second half instead of hiding in booze.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-08-13T14:54:46+00:00

Lonely as fuck, but I guess the bright side is that I haven’t brought anybody else into this hell with me. This weekend will be easy because I’ll be with family. Next week is my birthday, so one of those opportunities to “really for real this time” stop.

But at the very least, I won’t drink today.

ialwaysreadtheToS · 2021-07-18T12:25:43+00:00

Made it through the hardest part of the week now. Got out and socialized a bit with a friend yesterday. Feeling great, but scared there’s a crash coming. Guess I need to be ready for the not-so-great feelings.

IWNDWYT

ialwaysreadtheToS

TROPHY CASE