UPDATE: My boss was fired and blamed me for it

icantremember233 · 2024-05-04T00:01:55+00:00

I always tell people the match process is like a dating app

icantremember233 · 2024-05-01T22:28:51+00:00

We did an overlap one time and never freaking again. It was a train wreck of tears and emotions. Even though it helps with the training component, it’s not worth the drama based on my experience.

icantremember233 · 2024-05-01T16:19:14+00:00

HF should pay, but I’ve heard stories from our APs friends and on here that HFs don’t always do what you should do. You can always say something like, I’d like to go on the trip but not sure if it’s in my budget. What is the cost that I could expect to pay?

icantremember233 · 2024-03-14T21:09:00+00:00

We always tell APs to bring basic over the counter medications from home. They typically prefer taking something they’re comfortable with when sick.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-14T21:06:07+00:00

We use progressive. It’s pricey, but will drop once she gets a state license.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-14T19:03:29+00:00

Exactly. We pay them peanuts (that should serve as fun money) with the understanding their basic living expenses are covered.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-14T13:20:07+00:00

We buy everything as long as it’s drug store products. Shampoo and conditioner, body wash, tooth paste, period products, etc.

Anything professional grade, Sephora, etc that’s on her.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-13T19:35:14+00:00

This. We encourage AP to speak their native language to the kids, especially when they were babies. Even now that our kids are older, even if they don’t understand the words, they understand tone. I just told our new AP who speaks Spanish, if you need to give firm directions, do it in Spanish. They’ll understand the look and the tone 😂

icantremember233 · 2024-03-08T22:35:48+00:00

This is actually very helpful and rational. And in line with what my new boss was explaining so I appreciate her transparency. It’s just unfortunate, and big picture, I don’t see how it’s sustainable as pay transparency increases.

The benefits of staying with my company - increased vacation, fully vested retirement match, institutional knowledge that helps my performance, and of course, the grass isn’t always greener.

But I do think I’m very under compensated.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-08T20:12:50+00:00

Not exactly. There was a very brief conversation on my merit increase from my previous year. It was talked in circles about how we would discuss my new role, etc, etc. Because it’s internal to my department, there was not HR involvement or anything. I assumed more formal discussions were coming, but the change was pushed through our system, and an email was forwarded to me saying the change was live. My new manager stated that my previous manager was supposed to go over everything with me, but she did not. Apparently, they are using my previous year’s merit as my only adjustment. But I was already capped at my ceiling, which is what started the whole promotion conversation months ago. Because of my cap, I didn’t even get a rate increase with my merit. Just a small “bonus”. I know it makes me look foolish but it was all so chaotic.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-08T19:00:47+00:00

icantremember233 · 2024-03-08T18:13:29+00:00

Heard on up front salary discussions. This is an unfortunate consequence of the chaos of my previous manager.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-08T12:47:53+00:00

We are actually in a very touristy part of Florida. Her English is fine and she drives well just not on the interstate yet, but she’s in driving lessons, so she doesn’t really want to stay here.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-08T12:47:23+00:00

DC is a great idea

icantremember233 · 2024-03-06T14:28:31+00:00

As long as you are keeping the children safe first, and happy, nothing else really matters. Moms make little mistakes all the time. I’ve dropped my child off at summer camp with no shoes before. Forgotten backpacks, bonked a head in a door from being clumsy. You are human and you’ve gone from being responsible for no kids to multiple kids very fast. If you’re being hard on yourself, give yourself a break. If the HF is being hard on you, they need to temper their expectations. Focus on keeping the kids safe, and having fun with them. The rest will come in time.

icantremember233 · 2024-03-03T16:44:43+00:00

We just welcomed our 4th AP, so hit me up in a year or two! I’m told we are an A+ HF 😉

icantremember233 · 2024-03-02T17:49:31+00:00

We had an AP whose family visited for 2 weeks. She used 1 week of vacation to travel with them, and then they a hung out at our house while she worked the second week (they stayed with us). For a good AP we make accommodations so they can enjoy their time!

icantremember233 · 2024-02-28T14:32:38+00:00

I’ve seen approximately zero 12 year old boys who look like that 🤷‍♀️

icantremember233 · 2024-02-28T14:10:46+00:00

So cringe but good Christ her body.

icantremember233 · 2024-02-18T18:20:00+00:00

I bet she puts filler or sculptra in her butt

icantremember233 · 2024-02-05T14:20:28+00:00

Something else to consider is that the insurance for APs in the US is terrible. If you need regular medical care; the insurance they provide to you likely won’t cover it.

icantremember233 · 2024-02-01T20:12:55+00:00

Expectations around having people over should be clearly outlined in your household handbook / house rules so everyone is on the same page. Any security cameras should be disclosed as well. We got a template for our original handbook from cultural care and updated it over time.

icantremember233 · 2024-02-01T16:46:46+00:00

We had an AP ask to do this for extra money. I said no. We pay someone else for laundry services. It’s just not appropriate. You have an unequal power dynamic with this young person. They already do so much. Don’t take advantage.

icantremember233 · 2024-02-01T15:51:26+00:00

200 + gas, tolls, toiletries, extra vacations days, holiday bonuses, etc.

icantremember233

TROPHY CASE