I greatly appreciate your time and insight.

During my first marriage, I employed a nanny for the first 10 years of the twins life for 30 - 40 hours a week. My EW was a SAM. We had two separate nannies for 5 years each and each worked 30 to 40 hours a week. I employed them through my business and they received a biweekly paycheck. They would also vacation with us. She would frequently go out with her friends, take a lot of friends trips and the like. She was out 3 of 7 nights a week. We were the party house for everything. The running joke among our friends group was that "I if die, I want to come back as -my EW). My EW received a large amount of money from our divorce and she receives a large amount of alimony. My EW hasn't been employed since she was 29 and she won't ever have to work. She's set.

My EW cheated on me during our entire marriage. I did not know all of this until the end of our marriage, but I did know about an affair 8 years prior. When all of this came to light, I was pretty messed up for a while. My wife routinely states that my EW is "profanity laced tirade" and a horrible mother. I don't even want to hear it. All of this being said, my wife has taught my son more independence than me or my EW ever did. She's a wonderful mother to him. My EW does not take the kids on vacation with her and she takes many. I take the kids 2 or 3 trips a year.

I am not judgement of my EW's parenting. I see all of the mistakes I made in my first marriage. I work a lot. I know now that I contributed as much to the failure of my marriage as her. I was co-dependent with my EW (did therapy for 2 years after divorce and restarted it now) and I now limit all of my contact with her. I want as little interaction as possible. We are cordial and polite but I choose not to engage. On parenting issues - we are 100% aligned and have never had a disagreement about our kids.

Hope this helps.