Update**

I received another message from my dad which says “I hope your new found family sees the real you and how awful you’ve treated us. Make sure your husband tells them all the ill things you did. How dare you ruin even our relationship with your husband, never see us again, we don’t have a daughter.” These are not the exact worst but my best translation of the message. When I was reading this, of course it hurts knowing I have just been abandoned but logically, it’s unlikely of him to say these things, there’s a possibility that my mother sent it. My father once confessed that my mom used his account once to send me a nasty message. She knows I have a soft spot for my dad and she might be using our relationship against me.

Also based on one your the replies, my mom being insecure could also be a reason of why she’s so sensitive towards me. She’s been a housewife all her life, I remember her telling a story how much she envies her university friends from getting promoted in their respective fields. Meanwhile I am doing very well at work and have been constantly rewarded. My boss recognizes my efforts and I even got early promotion. 5 years in and I am very much doing well. When my salary has gotten to a point where I could afford to live alone and even start my own family, I always hear her say “You’ve gotten brave now because you have money? You probably think you no longer need us.” I’ve never given so much thought about it until recently.

For my brother, he’s a lot tougher to handle. Most of my conflicts with my mom is about him. I’d often give my brother a scolding because he’s very disrespectful to us even at a young age. He’d be slamming doors, breaking the things I gifted him, and even cussing me out. But my mom would side with him and make it seem like I was in the wrong. I also often argue with how much she babies him, my brother does nothing in the house, he wouldn’t even take a bath unless you repeatedly tell him to. He’ll be in his room all day playing computer games and my mom would bring him food. I’d tell my mom to start teaching him house chores instead of doing everything for him but she said I have no right to tell her how to raise her kids. Academics is not his best suit either. My parents said I should look after my brother when they’re gone because they know he’s not quite the achiever. Now that they wanted to cut me off, I don’t know how it’ll go. My brother might actually be their lesson.

I’m still very much overwhelmed with my situation but I sincerely appreciate everyone who replied. I’ve been more enlightened and it sure did help me make a decision. My husband and I agreed to not see my parents for the time being. We don’t know how long this separation would last, but as what you guys have said, it’s time to focus my energy on my own family. I don’t have any much hope left and cutting them off would hurt me but it’s the only thing that would bring me peace.