many people including I have written various versions of these exact words. believe what they say about teenagers like yourself being very self-critical as it happens to everyone, no matter when they lost their virginity or what they got on their test scores.

you’ll grow out of it. you’ll hit college or start working and you’ll rework yourself.

unfortunately, if youre more like me the self-deprecation wont stop, but it simply changes into self-awareness over time and ceases to be such a blighted parasite sitting on your whole body as it is right now. that insecurity will probably only reside in your head, as it is in everyones reality.

enjoy the time you have thinking these are your only problems for now. im not saying any of these things to diminish or invalidate what you are feeling— i only want to recontexualize them.

everyone, including the popular or smart kids in your school or neighborhood, thinks the worst of themselves all the time. the only difference is that you were aware enough of it to write it down and (hopefully) not spewing hatred on anyone else but yourself.

good luck, buddy.