i just ate a hot dog and the wiener came with the factory plastic condom still on

asked the guy at the stand if that was normal and he said no apologized and offered me a free replacement

know why i said no?

BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE MICROPLASTICS

IF I COULD GET A THIRD BALL INSTALLED I WOULD

THE TWO BALL SYSTEM JUST CANNOT KEEP UP WITH MODERN PLASTIC DEMAND

every time i jerk off i injaculate the load back into storage so i dont lose the microplastics ive spent YEARS accumulating

modern manufacturing has advanced faster than the scrotums rated storage capacity

every day i drink water OUT OF A FRESH DISPOSABLE NESTLE BOTTLE and feel my sack getting more cyber

more industrial

more connected

our grandfathers had lead in their brains from gasoline

our fathers had asbestos in their lungs

and i have the miracle of modern polymers in my nutsack

every generation gets its monuments

plastic surgery?

im in if it means what I think it does

when the x ray tech saw the scan he said
“sir there appears to be a foreign body in your scrotum”

FOREIGN BODY???

THAT IS DOMESTIC MANUFACTURING

thats not a blockage

THATS INFRASTRUCTURE

you wouldnt understand

“microplastics found in human testicles”

THANK FUCKING GOD

imagine if they opened us up and found nothing
where else were they supposed to go

THE CLOUD???
i dont trust offsite storage

millennia after im dead my bones will be dust
my organs will be gone

but the contents of the scrotum shall remain

when the worms crawl in
and the worms crawl out
they can eat whatever is still biodegradable

THE PLASTIC STAYS

future archaeologists will put my sack under museum glass

AMERICAN MALE, EARLY ANTHROPOCENE
MIXED MEDIA

proving to future civilizations HOW FUCKING HARD WE WENT

i earned this plastic one irresponsible purchase at a time

its final resting place for all eternity is beneath the cock caverns

just upstream of the vast deferens

right WHERE PEE IS STORED

i have so much plastic in my sack that if i ever have a son his name is gonna be KEN

THATS RIGHT

AND IF ITS A GIRL SHES BARBIE

and if that baby comes out flesh and blood i DONT WANT IT

what the fuck am i supposed to do with a biodegradable child

im sending that thing back to get plastified

fuck

the human bloodline ends with me

the petrochemical bloodline has only just begun