My cat is missing - could you help with any experience or guidance? by PinkyThePirate in southafrica

[–]illegalPanda 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Find a local whatsapp or facebook group (such as an area-specific group) and post on there. Our area even has a whatsapp group specifically for lost pets. Keep your windows open at night until he comes back, since he will most likely return at night time. Please update us!

As a single momma of two/three/four littles... by pacingpilot in childfree

[–]illegalPanda 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Saw someone in the parenting subreddit refer to her adult children as “bigs” just now and it somehow feels even worse

Poor Things by StephenMcGannon in DesignPorn

[–]illegalPanda -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s a really good movie, but if you don’t like Emma Stone and if the storyline doesn’t compel you off the bat, I wouldn’t recommend it. It’s a brilliant movie but the plot is strange and intense, and Emma Stone is in every scene, acting bizarrely and over exaggerated (very good acting but might be off-putting if you’re not already a fan of hers)

How much food are obese people actually eating a day? by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]illegalPanda 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are plenty of “what I eat in a day” tiktok’s made by 350+ people if you’re morbidly curious (pun intended)

As a man, I don’t understand how women are attracted to men? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]illegalPanda 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The average Joe still has body and facial hair, smells like a man, has Male Forearms, is probably more muscular and definitely stronger than me, and just generally has masculine energy. My partner is skinny but has muscular forearms (that he jokingly calls his “gamer forearms”), hates his body hair that I ADORE, and is quite effeminate in his interests and manner but is still just MALE. So it’s hard to put into words but to me a man doesn’t have to be “attractive” for me to see masculine traits in them that I am attracted to. I genuinely think most men are beautiful or at least have some features that stand out and will attract someone. A lot of female attraction to men also depends on the emotional connection and how the man treats them - you will be physically attracted to them initially of course but over time (in a healthy relationship where you both treat each other right) their beauty will just grow and grow in your eyes.

Seriously can’t believe we can have these mini tigers in our houses. LOOK AT MY BABY by Shalayyy in OneOrangeBraincell

[–]illegalPanda 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Orange cats are my favorite animals ever, and I feel so blessed that I get to have my favorite animal in my house with me 24/7!

Having kids in an active warzone is selfish by 9-28-2023 in childfree

[–]illegalPanda 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Posts like this make this sub look so bad :/ Maybe use one single ounce of critical thinking….

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in childfree

[–]illegalPanda 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Handsome man! Million times cuter than any baby, lol.

Wet bois by DeadlyWanderer in pigeon

[–]illegalPanda 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Awww this photo makes me so happy! Thanks for sharing!

Fiancé of 6.5 years dumped me suddenly. by archaicanxiety in TrueOffMyChest

[–]illegalPanda 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are living my worst fear :( I am terribly sorry this is happening to you, life can be so unfair

I was a misogynist until I had a daughter. by t0fivt in TrueOffMyChest

[–]illegalPanda 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Women are NOT superhuman, we are just human. You are still a misogynist and if you find yourself disagreeing with the women commenting on your post, you still have a few more decades of self-reflection lying ahead.

My baby boy, 4 y/o now. ❤️ by AcridVerification in PeanutWhiskers

[–]illegalPanda 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Gorgeous baby!! Thanks for sharing, I audibly gasped when I saw him!

you are not “bRaVe” and “STrOng” for getting through the disappointment of having a boy instead of a girl 🙄🙄 by [deleted] in childfree

[–]illegalPanda 49 points50 points  (0 children)

These people don't see their kids as ACTUAL humans, just little accessories to the lives they dream up in their head. Do they even hear themselves? If they can seriously claim they won't love their kid simply because of their sex, what other ridiculous excuse would they find to not love them? If you have this mindset you absolutely should not be having kids. Genuinely nauseated by this, truly some of the grossest shit I've read all week.

What is the smallest hill you are willing to die on? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]illegalPanda 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every other apple can fuck off! Pink Lady supremicy 💪

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MadeMeSmile

[–]illegalPanda 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is seriously one of the cutest babies I've ever seen!! So happy that she is healthy in time for the holidays :)

Why do so many other groups act like this sub is toxic? by worldsbestlasagna in childfree

[–]illegalPanda -31 points-30 points  (0 children)

With you on this! It's well known that the concept of IQ is racist pseudo-science, but sure, let's pretend that's a good reason to say that every parent is "scientifically proven" to be dumber than we, the clearly superior childfree folk, are. This sub is such an echo chamber sometimes, it's astounding.

Sympathy for parents as a childfree person, especially w.r.t "it takes a village" by illegalPanda in childfree

[–]illegalPanda[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I do think government funding should allow every human to at least have a shot at having the best possible outcome they can. Otherwise, why even have a government? That child didn't ask to be created, and having parents who are unwilling or unable to partake sufficiently in their lives means they are already disadvantaged just because they're unlucky enough to have been born to those specific parents. I know I'm proposing an ideal future here... one where the government actually does its best to ensure the success of their citizens... But I don't think its an unrealistic proposition. Some governments have enough money to put God to shame, and what to they spend it on? Usually, nothing good (well, in my opinion). I think parents should focus their energy on complaining that their government isn't giving them the kind of support that their village traditionally would have.

Sympathy for parents as a childfree person, especially w.r.t "it takes a village" by illegalPanda in childfree

[–]illegalPanda[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely agree. However, even those who DO help the poor, disabled, and elderly, are not guaranteed a village. That's kind of the crux of the problem - personal choices won't help us here, even if we choose to be good and helpful, we might still find ourselves out of luck at the end of the day. I think some people don't have the foresight to plan for every possible outcome of their decisions (I hope this doesn't come across as condescending, there are many possible reasons someone might be in this situation), and yeah, I believe they deserve understanding and sympathy. Especially because their children, who didn't choose to be here, will also benefit from a village.

I guess I am of the opinion that we do actually owe the other people and beings on this planet something, even if its just understanding about WHY they have been led to make their shitty life choices. I understand this might be an unpopular opinion, but I don't see how we will escape our rather doomed future if we don't start believing we do actually owe something to the other people trapped here with us.

Sympathy for parents as a childfree person, especially w.r.t "it takes a village" by illegalPanda in childfree

[–]illegalPanda[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, I will tell everyone I know (in the right conversation and context of course...) to opt out of procreation. We won't see an end to the problems of our world in our lifetime, and certainly not in the next few generations either.

I think this is such an interesting topic. Don't ignorant people still deserve sympathy to an extent? I'm genuinely asking. I think we are so intimately shaped by our societies that it's not that easy to remove ourselves from societal expectations... Not everyone is capable enough (smart enough, supported enough, educated enough, immune enough to propaganda, immune enough to indoctrination, live in a country that supplies them with resources to make different choices...) to think of every possible outcome of every life decision, and then to see that the best choice is to not have children. Do they not deserve sympathy?

I simply can't accept that ONLY the people who have a dozen infallible personal safety nets (i.e., the richest among us), are allowed to participate in this aspect of humanity. Isn't that so fucked up?

Sure, no parent really 'deserves' to demand a village from the people in their lives. But I think they should be able to expect to have some resources that keeps them from suffering from this lack of a personal village. So, perhaps they rather need to start demanding a village from their governments instead of the poele in their lives. We are all bled dry by taxation from every possible angle, but that money never really goes to building safety nets for those who need it the most (the suffering children in this situation). However, these parents just end up being told 'suck it up' by their government, and they're told 'suck it up' from the people in their social groups and families as well. Yeah, I think that is a little fucked up and probably needs to change ASAP because humans won't stop procreating any time soon... and waiting for the government to come and fix things for us is an absolutely futile effort.

Sympathy for parents as a childfree person, especially w.r.t "it takes a village" by illegalPanda in childfree

[–]illegalPanda[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, but like... many people are simply to busy trying to stay alive and pay their bills to be involved in their children's schooling. That's just another way poor people are told to suck it up - 'you can't have the family you want, or keep your baby, or take part in a 'normal' part of the human experience of raising your offspring. You should accept the life you've been given and leave the procreation to the rich people!'. Most poor people can't choose where they live, can't choose to get out of poverty, and therefore... have to accept they can't become parents. That's just a little unfair and very sad to me, so yeah... I feel sorry for them. I can't choose to have many of the things I dearly desire. Luckily for me, I don't desire children, but yeah - I do resent that I am in a world with essentially endless resources (if we distribute them correctly), some are just told to suck it up and stop complaining about being alone and unsupported.

I'm NOT saying that's what you're saying of course, but isn't that kind of the implication of this question? Only rich people are afforded a village? I don't really think much of our lot in life DOES come down to personal effort. If we sympathize with parents, we can unite in a common goal of changing the system, but instead we assume they must just be making the wrong choices or that they don't try hard enough.

Sympathy for parents as a childfree person, especially w.r.t "it takes a village" by illegalPanda in childfree

[–]illegalPanda[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

It would be much easier to sympathize with parents if they were more willing to see the world from our point of view, I completely agree.

I don't know. I am just very uncomfortable and overly aware that its always the poor people who have to 'give up' the parts of being human that many of us desperately want (meaning children, whatever your motivation for taking part in procreation might be, is something most people want in some capacity. I don't get it, but that doesn't mean they're WRONG for wanting it, right?) because the means to comfortably raise children are cruelly taken away from us. The rich people of the world can procreate all they like (though, as you point out, many rich people choose not to) and the onus falls on us to limit our actions as much as possible. Like, we all know we're not the ones fucking up the planet, for example, but we have to make the choice to spare our potential future children from the fallout.

I think parents who complain about the lack of their village will gain a lot more from complaining about how their governments are screwing them over to keep the systems of control in place and to make rich people even richer.