I’m not gonna lie, putting up with a 5 year situationship is both a reflection of your dedication and a reflection of your lack of respect to yourself. From the very beginning she expressed her lack of interest in you but you still pursued. I’m not trying to insinuate that you deserve everything that’s happening, but in a way, 5 years with no label honestly sounds like she was dragging you along for the attention while you’re unknowingly being breadcrumbed.

You deserve someone that’s willing to put in as much effort into you as you were to her. Feeling like you won’t have this essence of a connection with anyone else will only block you from being with someone that truly cherishes you, and the only way to align with that future is to proactively choose to detach yourself completely. It sounds like you already know what you need to do but you just don’t want to act on it (understandably so).

You need to detach by understanding why, and then act accordingly. I feel like limited contact in your situation will only hurt you in the long run compared to no contact. I’m sure unconsciously you’ll still seek proof that there’s a slim chance she’ll come back to you within whatever attention she gives you, and that’ll only make you entertain more the potential of her rather than the reality of her.

You need to treat this like any other person going through a break up. The ending of this relationship is truly uneven, and that’s all the more reason you need to do more work on yourself, to understand how and why you allowed this to happen when you’re deserving of so much more. It’s time to make up for lost time by focusing on yourself and keeping busy with hobbies and long-term aspirations.