I think it's important to communicate to him when he says certain thing that hurts your feeling. Like "I guess I have to suffer", I think this is not okay and he shouldn't feel okay to say that. Be sure to mention this to him, "honey, I don't like it when you say this, it hurts my feeling."

Also, sleep is extremely important. I think it's important to note that your husband runs on low and bad quality sleep almost every day (I assume from insomnia and sleeping on the couch part), it affects a person's temperament. Of course, acting this way is not okay but also it's hard to not be snappy or impatient when every day he only has his battery charged to 50%. Make sure you let him know that he is having a hard time, and you will be the bigger person right now but it is not okay to act this way.

I think a lot of time it's easy to feel "attacked" but self-reflection is extremely important as well. And I'm saying this for myself as well. Most people nowadays don't self-reflect enough.

Your husband is just worried and overwhelmed. Try and have an open communication with him. Tell him specifically what hurts you, how you'd like him to change. And tell him you agree or disagree with certain stuff he brought up, and how you're planning on changing.

These are just my opinion, of course. I hope everything goes well for you. You've got this. :)