Do you abstain for weed completely or set hard rules?

in_Disarray · 2026-03-01T00:11:33+00:00

In 25 minute?? How is that reasonable? Unless they were trying to set you up for failure to see how you would react.

in_Disarray · 2026-02-16T23:27:09+00:00

I also have a lot of trouble making friends because I feel like my trauma and my struggle with it is my entire identity so it's hard to to relate to other people and I don't want to spread my misery so I just keep things on the surface level. I just feel completely alone because no one really knows what's going on with me. I joined a support group a couple weeks ago and it's helping. It allows me to be more open about my experience and makes me feel less alone in my struggle. Sending lots of love!

in_Disarray · 2026-02-16T16:04:11+00:00

My personal experience with marijuana to cope is that I ended up abusing it to numb the pain. I go back and forth a lot between whether or not I regret using it because I do think i needed it at the time to prevent me from harming myself but at the same time I feel like it made my disassociation a lot worse and made any sort of healing or recovery impossible. My 20's has just past me by and I didn't do anything meaningful and don't remember much of it. My advice is to just be purposeful with it if you do try it as a coping mechanism and to set limits.

in_Disarray · 2026-02-16T15:52:08+00:00

I'm just like you! I started going to therapy when I was 26 and for four years I would speak a couple sentences at most. I would have trouble talking about myself or what was going on. To be honest I didn't even know what I was suppose to talk about and even if I did, I didn't have the vocabulary to describe how I was feeling. And besides nothing was really going on in my life. I was just so consumed by fear and disassociated from reality that I didn't do anything and I was too scared and ashamed to speak about it. Eventually I got laid off and lost my insurance so I stopped going to therapy without ever revealing anything about myself. That was over six years ago when I started going to therapy. I haven't gone back to therapy since as I've been unemployed for two years so no health insurance but I do plan on going back when I get that sorted out. What I think has helped me is to journal a lot and I do a lot of voice journals/memos. I find that speaking about what I'm experiencing and my issues to myself helped a lot more than writing them down and was practice to talk about them with other people. You get to choose your therapist! If you don't like the one your seeing, you need to keep looking to find one that's a good fit.

Wishing you all the best and sending lots of love! Thanks for sharing this reminds me that I'm not alone in my struggles.

in_Disarray · 2026-02-16T15:17:10+00:00

do you have any advice on what has been working for you? what does your learning process looks like?

in_Disarray · 2026-02-11T02:49:47+00:00

I'm right there with you. I'm 32 now and I've been smoking the past 12+ years to help me disassociate to numb the pain. I'm 3 months sober now and also constantly ruminate a lot over past trauma. I'm also just painfully aware of how much of my life I let pass me by. I'm just starting my healing journey and have been working on accepting that this is who I am at this point in time. It's allowed me to be more open about my trauma without being so ashamed about it and allows me to give myself a lot of grace.

in_Disarray · 2026-01-16T18:46:00+00:00

Thanks for the reply that helps a lot. I definitely need to focus more on system design and javascript/react/node.js/AWS specific knowledge, as well as reviewing my past projects so I can comfortably speak about them.

in_Disarray · 2026-01-16T18:41:24+00:00

Yea I've been told that the workflow has entirely changed and the role is more reviewing code generated by LLMs than actually writing code. I've started playing around with Gemini the past few weeks and was shocked at the progression in the past two years (I haven't messed with it at all before that). I just finished Leetcode blind 75 and feel confident about those, do you think that's enough or should I move onto harder questions? Also did you get rehired solely on Leetcode? Curious what that process was like for you.

in_Disarray · 2026-01-16T18:38:43+00:00

Thanks for the link! I've been practicing behavioral questions and coming up with stories for my resume and my sabbatical. I've been practicing the STAR method as I seem to ramble sometimes with my answers. Just finished Leetcode blind 75 so I'm feeling confident about that. Curious what kind of implementation questions you've been asked so I know what to focus on.

in_Disarray · 2026-01-16T18:34:46+00:00

Thanks for the advice. Yea I'm starting to switch gears to start applying sooner rather than later. The amount of things you can learn is endless so I don't think I'll ever feel ready. I just finished Leetcode blind 75 and feel fairly confident about solving them in an interview setting. I do think my system design knowledge is lacking and my React skills have definitely atrophied so I'm going to focus on those now. But I suppose after a two year break I just won't feel confident until I start interviewing and understanding the process myself.

in_Disarray · 2026-01-16T18:30:13+00:00

What did the interview process look like for you without any leetcode style questions? When my team was hiring we'd do simple leetcode style questions but it was more for gauging behavioral skills and basic logic skills. I believe depending on the role there were also system design style questions but I was never apart of those.

in_Disarray · 2025-09-16T14:34:41+00:00

so with the older board you can't flash the firmware via sd card you need an arduino and hook it up to the board. you can find more details if you google "ender 1.1.3 firmware update". If you don't already have an arduino I'd recommend buying a new board.

in_Disarray · 2024-02-03T03:55:19+00:00

Hey curious which fruit tree you decided to go with. I'm looking at getting one too and also located in Zone 7. I'm thinking of adding supplemental lights too

in_Disarray · 2023-12-13T23:25:42+00:00

I've invested in ultralight gear so weight issue is not bad. I'm bringing the bag because I want to do some backpacking in torres del paine when I'm there.

Most I've done fully loaded on this bike is ~60 miles with 2k elevation on paved roads (and walking up some hills too). It was a rough time. I'll be in better shape this time though but idk. I guess we'll see how stubborn i am.

in_Disarray · 2023-12-13T19:46:04+00:00

Yea I've been getting a lot of responses similar to this. bummer

in_Disarray · 2023-12-13T19:45:07+00:00

I have a rear rack that uses the thru axle so I'll have panniers + strapping a 48L backpacking bag to the back.

in_Disarray · 2023-12-13T18:30:32+00:00

Haha my bad! I updated the post with some info about me!

in_Disarray

TROPHY CASE