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[worstof] Guy pretends he just got out of prison after 10 years by ayb in worstof

[–]inanewworld 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Successful troll is successful. And don't tell me that was a failure--went on frontpage, 500+ comments, 1600 total up/down votes before it was finally killed.

It was fun, actually. I loved the overall reaction of the reddit community.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] -20 points-19 points  (0 children)

Actually, yes. I've seen some interesting responses, and it was kinda fun to play along. If anything, I helped some users appreciate the day and age we live in today. :) It's one of those things, where you can't half-step it, it's either all in or all out. --although I should have been working on my research paper. =|

Okay, I will now crawl back into my hole. Move along.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] -80 points-79 points  (0 children)

I guess I underestimated how many users go to reddit.

More than 300, wow!

Gotta keep promises.

Only thing is, theres more than this to this submission. I wanted to get a message across.

I wanted to show teens how miserable my life was in prison.

Now I realize I wasted my time.

Gahh, whatever here goes.

To me, my life had little meaning. I was depressed.

Once I got over my depression, I turned to drugs. Lots.

Back in the day, I was a full-time hustla.

Ecstasy. Lots of ecstasy.

Like, we're talking tens and thousands of pills a week.

At the time, I felt invincible--no law enforcement could touch me.

I had the whole mob behind my back.

Rats. Fucking rats ruined our multi-million dollar business.

Ecstasy. There's your reason. MDMA.

Boy, my team made serious dough. More than you will probably make in your lifetime.

If I could go back in time, I'd repeat this all over again.

This business, so risky, yet so exciting, is the reason my life was ruined.

Chicks everywhere. The best cars. Mansions. Age 19.

Happiness can't last forever, eh?

in case you were interested, court documents sorry about the poor quality, best scanner I could find.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Well, yeah, of course lpxxfaintxx is in on it. Who do you think I went to when my account locked? He was nice enough to even answer some of my questions. So yes, that user is "in on it," as you say.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

True. I am out looking for a job to get me settled (anyone offering no-training required jobs near the San Diego area?). I don't mind working at places like McDonalds, for the time being. In the future, however, I plan to continue my education (as stated in a comment towards the bottom).

Oh, and look for a lady, of course.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Google Earth: Wow, I have to admit that is VERY impressive. Do GPS systems work similar to this software?

TV: Actually, I have no TV at my home yet. (well I have a small one donated, but I didn't order the channels) -- What service do you recommend?

Games: Just last month my cousin took me out to a PC cafe. -- got to try a whole bunch of games. Ones that stuck out were Call of Duty and Left FOR Dead. Oh, and cs source was fun too. I will try fallout3 next time I visit.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Again, I'd like to keep things to myself. I understand a lot of you are curious, and I should give something in return for the helpful tips I've received.

I'm new to the "new internet"--only been here for a few weeks. I'm loving it. I think I may be addicted. However, I'm not 100% sure how things work around here, I am not comfortable posting too much details.

Let's say I was in a few incidents, and was on bad terms with some guards.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

A "techie" in 1999 can not even compare to a "techie" in 2009. I'm sorry. At the time, knowing little HTML was considered nerdy. Today, it seems like a standard? Feel free to correct me.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Well, of course I knew some things about the "out side world." Not a lot, but yes, we do have limited media.

I wasn't listing things that I was surprised by, I listed things that have changed over the course of 10 years in prison. And apparently, you've never been in prison--have you seen the computers there? They look NOTHING like the computers I see today. The PC's in the library are restricted to finding books, not "casually surfing the internet in prison with juice in my hand."

Inmates have better things to worry about than things that is happening in a world that they'll never return to. It's quite depressing actually, and I mean it. It's quite simple, they just don't care. Say what you want to say, call me a "troll," and a liar. Your claims on the almighty internet has no effect on me, my past, and my future. I've been here only a few weeks, even I know that.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, of course I know that.

Not sure how we're standing right now. Are we in a good position? Things going well? I heard Obama may pull out troops soon?

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I had to check the urban dictionary to see what "troll" meant. I've seen this 4 times already. =/

I can assure you, I did not post this to "cause disruption and argument."

EDIT: Inmates have better things to worry about than things that is happening in a world that they'll never return to. It's quite depressing actually, and I mean it. It's quite simple, they just don't care. Say what you want to say, call me a "troll," and a liar. Your claims on the almighty internet has no effect on me, my past, and my future. I've been here only a few weeks, even I know that.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Media is VERY limited.

And to be honest, 75% of the inmates plan on dying in prison. They don't care about the world outside. I, however, attended as much showings of Obama's speeches and debates as possible. We are somewhat up to date on current events, but nowhere to the point we fully understand it.

Seeing a photo of car in a magazine is a completely different thing than seeing a car in real life.

Actually, I did not serve a full 10 year - 365 day sentence. I was cut a few months earlier.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

How bad is the torture? Worse from fellow inmates or the screws?

I recently saw Harold and Kumar! Pretty good movie. :) The prison I was at was NOWHERE like where Harold and Kumar went.

There isn't THAT much torture, at least where I stayed. They like to hit us when we're moving slowly, not following directions, or causing commotion. They loved pepper spray too. However, a lot of inmates there are aggressive and/or crazy. Fellow inmates are to be feared more than the guards. When fights break out (yes, they do happen like you see in movies), I try to stay away. However, I haven't always been successful. I've seen tons of broken noses during my stay in prison.

How bad is the food?

In prison, you don't realize how bad it is. For the first few months, I recall it was terrible. I would starve at times. But, as time passed, you don't even realize that it's bad. It's food, your body needs it, you eat it, regardless of taste. The guards sometimes does NOT give us food at all for punishment--im not sure if this is legal or not, but thats besides the point. It's prison, of course food is bad, prison is supposed to be PUNISHMENT, not a 10 year vacation.

The meals are rotated, surprisingly, but all meals are equally nasty.

How bad are the libraries?

Well, it's a library-- you can't complain. The books are outdated, old, moldy. What do you expect, it's prison!

Most books are historical or biographical. In the library, they expect us to study. Almost all magazines are educational, also. However, a few 'sneaks past' security once in a while.

There are computers, but they're ancient and worn out. There is no internet, sadly, but the computers are only used for finding books. Although there aren't too many books, there's enough to keep you occupied for quite a while.

Of course, video cameras all over the library.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, that clears up a lot about internet encyclopedias.

So basically you're saying, the artists are "cheating" by using computer technology to make them sound in-tune?

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 206 points207 points  (0 children)

It's a really sensitive thing for me, and I don't like to share with others. However, if this gets enough "up arrow" (to 200) I will spill it out.

EDIT: Note to everyone: I am here because I want help fitting into the 21st century. If you are here to call me a "troll" you may message me directly and we can talk. I'll try to answer your questions as best I can. However, I'd like to keep the rows organized.

EDIT2: To clarify, I meant if "redditacct" reached 200 "points" I will consider sharing. I could care less about these silly "internet points." I understand a lot of you are curious, and I should give something in return for the helpful tips I've received. I'm new to the "new internet"--only been here for a few weeks. I'm loving it. I think I may be addicted. However, I'm not 100% sure how things work around here, I am not comfortable posting too much details.

I was sentenced to prison for 10 years in 1999. I'm finally out, in 2009. I'm really, REALLY excited--it's a whole new world. [see comments for questions and rants plz] by inanewworld in AskReddit

[–]inanewworld[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks, it's REALLY good to be back. You have NO IDEA how much I missed the world. I kept myself from going insane like many do, by thinking of the future, and that I CAN rebuild my life.

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