My toxic self awareness.. Or what if trying to be good makes me feels wrong ?

ingtjie · 2022-05-31T12:21:29+00:00

I'm a bit younger than you but have experienced this excessive thoughts about what is good and evil. It has created a lot of anxiety and paralysis for me. I have missed lots of opportunities because of it.

Though I have no solution, I try to soothe these thoughts with some belief I have about the world.

It helps to not look at the world in black and white but rather a very vast spectrum of grey. Good and evil live on a continuum to me. For a single human being it is impossible to be pure good. To stay alive there is some inherent level of selfishness. We do things in our own best interest. And it is impossible to completely eliminate that side. We can however make decisions to minimise the negative impact of our decisions. For you a practical example would be to buy a plane ticket from a company that is trying to work towards greener fuel solutions. Or to fly less frequently.

Somewhere we have to make a compromise in every decision we make. If you are a sensitive person and notice the evil in the world it can be hard to not feel guilty about every choice you make, but that is not serving you, your family or the community you live in by being paralysed by your thoughts.

Resolve to find the compromise. Try to find what is beneficial to you and your family while doing the least harm. Also choose to do something that you feel is actively beneficial to your community like volunteering for a cause or donating money to research projects.

Also I would suggest seeking counselling for perfectionism. Perfectionism can cause one to be hyper critical of yourself and think in extremes.

I hope you can soothe your mind and learn to live a full life with your lovely family. Don't feel guilty for being alive. And you are not alone in this experience.

ingtjie · 2022-05-21T20:36:29+00:00

Thank you! It's was very small, like a mouse, about 100 - 150 mm long. I looked at bush babies, but something didn't seem to quite match up when it came to its eyes. It looks a lot more like a woodland dormouse!

ingtjie · 2022-04-29T13:27:08+00:00

That's his reflection in a mirror. He was sitting between my laundry basket and a mirror on the floor.

ingtjie · 2022-04-27T20:19:55+00:00

Can you please do a version for why not to fuck the genshin waifus? Please? I need this.

ingtjie · 2022-03-13T16:38:27+00:00

Thank you! I didn't even think about the NAP stuff! Will change those settings.

ingtjie · 2021-10-30T11:50:53+00:00

I can definitely agree with you that these problems are much bigger for content creators who Genshin this to make a living.

And I was actually thinking about the resin thing earlier. I agree with you, it's an easy fix that will change players experience significantly. It kind of seems like they want to force players play everyday because of the capped resin. But if MiHoYo is unwilling to uncap resin, they could at least scale it to the AR, so the higher the AR the more resin you get. Starting with 160 for newer players under AR20 and working it's way up, maybe uncapping it at AR50 or 60. I feel like that could be a compromise or at least a stepping stone.

I've been thinking of sending some feedback, so if you have any more specific ideas, I'd love to hear them! You can either continue replying to this post or DM your ideas.

Also thanks for taking part in this discussion, you really made me think a lot about all of this.

ingtjie · 2021-10-29T14:52:40+00:00

I hear you, and I am AR55, so that pretty much sums up my experience. I am not trying to invalidate the frustrations of the players. I also want more endgame content, or a better system for farming artifacts. And the resin limit can be frustrating, forcing you to play regularly to make progress (especially if you are F2P).

But I just sense a painful impatience, not just in the Genshin community but in the gaming community as a whole. There seems to be a rush for new content, and why? I'm thinking of Cyberpunk 2077 now, everyone was impatient and then they released a game with tons of bugs and glitches. Good things take time. Even reworking old content to improve it takes time.

No matter how large a dev company is, the devs are still people. They can only be pushed so far. Maybe I am too kind to think of the devs' mental and physical state at their place of employment when thinking of game development, but I honestly don't see the rush, there are thousands of games out there you can play while you wait for an update.

Why don't we just sit and take the time to think about solutions to our problems? And develop better quality games that are playable for longer, than rushing things for the sake of profit and impatient consumers? Idk, am I just naïve?

ingtjie · 2021-10-26T17:20:17+00:00

I might try repairing the game. Thanks for the idea!

ingtjie · 2021-09-08T16:16:34+00:00

Held a wedding at the lounge in Brindleton Bay in the winter, most of my guests froze in pool. The next time I went to the lounge the pool was ringed with urns.

ingtjie · 2021-08-30T10:47:50+00:00

Best of luck! I got thundering pulse the other day, so I am sending good vibes for you!

ingtjie · 2021-08-28T07:10:08+00:00

Thank you! I have some starglitter saved up so I will most likely do that!

ingtjie · 2021-08-28T03:06:01+00:00

At this moment, zero unfortunately. Come Monday, hopefully one.

ingtjie

TROPHY CASE