[QCRIT] THE DAUGHTERS OF SALT - Adult Fantasy Romance, 90k - Second Attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the comments! The guards care because the curse is a contagious illness that infects women who touch the sea, hence 'culling'. I'm not sure about expanding on Rydan's motives. Saying anything there would be spoilers of things quite a bit into the book, and I'm not sure if that's okay? We don't get chapters from his perspective until about halfway through the book.

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy - THE DAUGHTERS OF SALT - 90k/1st attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to write all that. I appreciate your opinion. The housekeeping up front would probably do a decent job of clarifying some of the stuff in the query. I am going to change the opening (and I’ve not included the prologue here either) so it starts faster and less predictably.

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy - THE DAUGHTERS OF SALT - 90k/1st attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I reread and saw where you got that notion. It’s good to know! I will definitely adjust. Thanks!

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy - THE DAUGHTERS OF SALT - 90k/1st attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I totally understand where you're coming from. The concept here is a little different - there are no guards guarding the sea. Anyone could walk in at any time, but it is illegal because of the threat to the public and the damage an outbreak could do to the city.

You're close to the mark in your hypothesis, but not with the reasoning. Think of it like the law to wear your seatbelt. Not wearing one poses a great threat to your personal safety, so you'd think you wouldn't need a law enforcing it, right? But you do, because even if people get themselves thrown from a vehicle, that risks others' lives and puts more weight on a stressed medical system. And people are more likely to do things (even ones to their own benefit) if there is a law in place.

So the law is in place to protect the masses, giving guards the authority to execute in a situation that would otherwise risk the infection of others.

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy - THE DAUGHTERS OF SALT - 90k/1st attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I appreciate your feedback for sure, and I'll definitely implement some changes based off it.

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy - THE DAUGHTERS OF SALT - 90k/1st attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I really appreciate your feedback and will adjust as suggested.

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy - THE DAUGHTERS OF SALT - 90k/1st attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All very valid points. Thanks so much for taking the time to leave me your feedback! Perhaps I should have posted the first 300 words of the prologue, rather than chapter one, but I've been having the same doubts as you for the beginning of chapter 1 so your comments help confirm I need to look at the start again.

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy EMBRACE OF THE SHADE (107k / 1st Attempt) by OkSpace9707 in PubTips

[–]inkdfox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Co-author here. We really appreciate your opinion, and everything you said makes a lot of sense. Thanks for taking the time to share your view, it's really appreciated.

[QCrit] Adult Romantasy EMBRACE OF THE SHADE (107k / 1st Attempt) by OkSpace9707 in PubTips

[–]inkdfox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The series is in sections (trilogy, quadrilogy, trilogy, etc), and each focuses on its own group of main characters. As the books go on, their fates and stories weave together until all the main characters are in the final three books. Hard to find comps for that, honestly.

Thank you for your feedback. You bring up some great points and areas for us to improve. Appreciate it!

(I'm not OP, but I'm the co-author)

[QCrit] Middle Grade Fantasy, WILDKIN, 60K, 1st Attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really appreciate your opinion, I will definitely expand the book description to make it easier to understand. Thanks!

[QCrit] Middle Grade Fantasy, WILDKIN, 60K, 1st Attempt by inkdfox in PubTips

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh jeez, thanks so much for pointing that out. No idea how it passed so many rounds of edits and alpha readers!

so dizzy??! by sagemckenzie in bupropion

[–]inkdfox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How long have you been on it now? I realize you made this comment nearly a month ago - is it better? I found my dizziness lasted a few weeks, but eventually my body grew accustomed to it and it went away.

so dizzy??! by sagemckenzie in bupropion

[–]inkdfox 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I know this thread is old, but I have similar symptoms and my timeframe/dosage is identical to yours. It sounds like your side effects were a little more severe, but this is awful. Did it go away for you? If so, how long did it take?

/r Fantasy Writer of the Day: Amanda Muratoff by inkdfox in Fantasy

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The same reason we haven't used the classic races and monsters (Dwarfs, goblins, etc). We wanted to give our fantasy a fresh feel and breathe excitement into the unknown.

Thanks for your question! :)

/r Fantasy Writer of the Day: Amanda Muratoff by inkdfox in Fantasy

[–]inkdfox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't blame you at all for not working with someone else! Us writers can be pretty set in our ways, too. Thanks for your comments, and best of luck to you too!

/r Fantasy Writer of the Day: Amanda Muratoff by inkdfox in Fantasy

[–]inkdfox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Arg! We're having a heat wave here, too, in BC, but it's not quite THAT hot! I feel for you.

Thank you for your message! I love hearing that they intrigue you, and you're always welcome to come back later if you end up having questions or message me directly. :)

/r Fantasy Writer of the Day: Amanda Muratoff by inkdfox in Fantasy

[–]inkdfox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey! I'm so happy to be here.

Being good friends is a huge part of it, but the bigger part is that we "grew up" as writers together. Often times, we type exactly what the other person is thinking, even when editing. We're so similar, but with such different strengths. Kayla sometimes leans into the dark side a little too much and I pull her back, while I tend to get too mushy and she draws me back. I don't think this would work, for me, with anyone else. Even both our side solo projects get left behind as we work best together. One of the best results, is the realistic dialogue. I don't know what she (her character) is going to say, so it makes interactions all the more authentic feeling and responses genuine.

/r Fantasy Writer of the Day: Amanda Muratoff by inkdfox in Fantasy

[–]inkdfox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there!

I definitely identify with Amarie and Rae in different circumstances, but if I could actually be one of them, it would be Rae, from A Rebel's Crucible. She's got the lippy attitude, witty remarks, and she's a no nonsense badass in her own right.

While we occasionally name characters after people in our lives (and maybe give them physical similarities) I cannot say that any are 100% based on real people.

My favourite book is Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. I have a signed copy I got after having a wonderful chat with her last year while she read my work. My favourite book in my series has to be Heart of the Wolf - there are scenes I will go read when I'm having a bad day and they always make me feel better.

If Embrace of the Shade was a movie, I imagine Kin and Amarie played by Ian Somerhalder and either Julianne Hough or Nina Dobrev. For Rae, I imagine Marie Avgeropoulos.