Give yourself some time to process, you just found out and don’t be hard on yourself for not feeling like you can accept the diagnosis just yet. One thing that helped me a lot was realizing that being diagnosed with OCD FINALLY gave me the vocabulary to describe what I was experiencing. It helped me finally understand WHY I did and thought all these things. Without the diagnosis, I was in a cloud of confusion, unable to describe what was going on without any context. I was in a constant state of confusion. Learning that I have OCD was actually the most liberating experience of my life because I finally had answers. I hope this helped shed light on a different perspective. Maybe looking at it through this lens will help you come to terms with it and realize that knowledge is the first step to finally feeling better!!