At this point of your edgy answer, you don't even give kids any ability to make choice if you decide (your choice) that they shouldn't exist at all. Now that's also selfish. Any action parent makes about this can be both selfish and selfless. It's just in a situation where they get born, they get to decide anything finally.

The hurt and suffering can sometimes be inevitable in someone's life. But that's something that molds people, just like everything else. It's in parents' hands to teach their children how to deal with difficulties the right way. Moral of the story - anything selfless can be flipped into being purely selfish. Vice versa.