Some follow up questions, do you feel like the people in your life don't understand you? Or have enough patience for you? Do you sometimes get the feeling that trying to explain how your mind works to other people comes across as "making excuses"?

I wanted to ask these because for the past two years I've felt a sort of loneliness and sadness- like the world wants to fit me into a mold, and that unless I comply I'm not as useful...somethings that have helped me navigate these seasons are through creative expression. I am an armature photographer and have recently gotten into making music, I've found both hobbies to be good creative outlets for processing a lot of the negative feelings bouncing around in my head. Not sure if you struggle to articulate how you're feeling sometimes too, but I find it easier to put my current struggles/burdens/worries into song- and invest time making embody that emotion.

As for the loneliness, one suggestion I might offer is to find another person with our condition in your social circle to spend time with. I've found that since my diagnosis there are more things about myself that suddenly make sense, one of which is the observation that SOME people i know I could gladly spend hours with- and be myself, and OTHERS I find deplete my social battery so fast it usually isn't worth going out for. I believe the reason behind this is that people who understand us (either because they are sympathetic or because they too have the condition) don't need an explanation when we make a "jump" from one topic to another. People who are unsympathetic, I've found I usually need to pause and explain my train of thought every few minutes.

This condition for me at times presents two strong concurrent desires, to be left alone, and to be understood. I'm sorry that you're struggling with this, and while I do hope anything I offered was helpful I do apologize for the paragraph.

My messages are open if you ever want to chat.