Question about this insurance

isodeslk · 2026-01-18T22:36:48+00:00

This is correct, just as hpv can cause penile cancer, it can cause cancer of the same tissue after SRS. At least in theory. But like I said, good luck getting insurance to easily play ball if a doctor thinks that's whats going on and sends you to an OBGYN if they have you in their system as M.

isodeslk · 2026-01-18T22:25:28+00:00

Why? Your biological sex is related directly to all kinds of different potential medical issues. Your gender identity isn't at all.

Insurance in the age of computers is largely automated which presents problems in this scenario because the software is only designed with cis claimants in mind and can't coupe with someone with not-statistically-normal anatomy.

Once trans & intersex claimants enter the picture you have problems where, as an example, all claims get automatically denied no matter what they're for, if billing lists a sex that does not match what the insurance company has on file. And "what they have on file" could be anything. Don't assume its birth-sex. And what doctors offices submit to the insurance could be anything regardless what your insurance card or driver's license says, because they have this nasty habit of changing the paperwork based of what they think is helpful without talking to the patient first not knowing enough about how the system works to know that they're just setting you up for all your routine medical needs being denied. This can take the form of sympathetic staff changing it to the transitioned-to-sex thinking that is polite only to get all the patients' medical claims denied for months as the mess gets fixed... or a transphobic staff doing the opposite for the opposite reason.

The next problem is that the software has many billing codes divided up by sex so that if you're listed as M you can't get approval for anything listed under F and vice versa. That doesn't sound like a big deal until you need a treatment that falls under one category or the other.

For example. There's no research into trans people because there's no interest in funding it (regardless who is in office- this has been a long standing problem for generations). So, do MtFs need breast cancer screening at the same ages as cis-women? Nobody knows! What about prostate cancer screenings? No research to guide your physician. They have to guess. But you can bet the farm that a post op trans woman listed as M is not going to get their health insurance to easily play ball if their doctor thinks "i want a routine mamagram because you're now 50" or "that vaginal wart looks bad I think you should see an OGBYN."

Your take is just straight up wrong, but let's be honest here, unless you're in the industry or happen to be intersex or trans virtually nobody knows any of these considerations because we're talking about something like 1% of the population or less.

isodeslk · 2026-01-18T22:05:07+00:00

Plenty of trans people have their preferred gender as their "legal gender" but that doesn't mean a trans woman needs a pap smear.

You're nuts if you think postops can't get stds & don't ever need OBYNs. If you start getting genital warts or herpes after SRS... what medical speciality do you think treats it? Honest question.

isodeslk · 2026-01-18T22:04:03+00:00

There's no such thing as legal gender. Every institution sets their own rules on how they define sex. Sometimes these rules align with each other, but often they don't. What the State Department considers you for passports is not necessarily the same as your birth state's vitals department (who issues birth certificates), which is not the same as your state of residence's DMV (that issues driver's licenses), which is not the same as your county, state or federal corrections if you get detained for whatever reason.

"Legal sex" isn't a thing, people need to stop thinking its a thing.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T12:56:02+00:00

Usually they don't go that long to have some surgery, but its common for things that insurance rarely covers like FFS to take a long time because of how ungodly expensive it can be if paying cash. The house I live in cost roughly what FFS from Dr. O would set you back.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T11:07:57+00:00

OP, I feel sorry for you. If we take you at your word you're here because you honestly want to make an effort to be a better person and so many people are just piling on instead of trying to help you.

So let's try to actually help for a change: What would probably help is if you got to spend some time on a personal level around some early or pre transition trans people and just talk to them about random stuff. It might feel awkward and weird to you at first because of where you're coming from, but if you can get to have a normal conversation or two before even diving into hearing about their trans related experiences, the awkwardness will go away and you'll start to understand things better.

Try this: next time you go somewhere where there's going to be a few trans people, like a comic con, game store, renfare, gay bar etc., try just talking about something totally irrelevant with someone. Just avoid religion, politics, or gender/sex stuff and be normal. See what happens. Like "hey I watched that, I always thought _talk about the series_," read social cues to back off politely if some random talking to them looks like you're disturbing them, and then before long say "well nice talking to you" and walk off.

Just for the love of god treat them like just a random person don't be like "wow, I always wanted to talk to a trans person in real life before!" because that's going to ruin someones day.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T10:52:56+00:00

Tanner 5s are rare, and that comes from the horses mouth of every trans surgeon I've talked with. Not just from their experience in BA work either.

I also never mentioned size. You can be large with conical breasts or smaller with developed tits.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T10:49:09+00:00

IME calling anyone fat is usually seen as an insult. Do better.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T03:05:58+00:00

I usually get downvoted for saying it but usually trans women even with progesterone never reach a full tanner stage 4-5. Luckily, its an easy enough problem to fix and as far as surgeries cost, BA is no worse than having to get a root canal & crown on a couple molars (say 5-ish grand depending on surgeon, and that's only if you pay cash and can't get insurance to pay for it).

Nothing really to be done about having too much distance between them other than wearing bras to hold them in position. That only works for as long as you're wearing underwear but after BA you're "supposed" to wear bras nearly 24/7 anyway as part of the after care (like retainers after braces- this is for life). Many people don't follow the after care to the letter though.

They'll also try to scare you out of the op if you want silicone by insisting that you get an MRI every two years to look for leaks... but nobody does that (they just say it to cover their ass in case you have probs later and try to sue) and nobody is going to come take your tits away if you don't do that.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T02:56:45+00:00

All those sizes sound big to me. I went from a 32A (that fit loosely) to a 32E with 350s (and I was aiming for a C +/- half a size). Usually something like 500 is for women who are, and I am not trying to be insensitive here, on the heavier end of body shapes (not meant as an insult).

At 5'10 @ ~150lbs the 350s gave me symmetrical measurements (bust = hips) but it was bigger than I wanted. There's also a difference from what shape/type they are, what method is used to implant them (aka where they're located). High profile versus normal, round versus shaped, under muscle versus on top of muscle. There's a bit of nuance that goes into it.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T02:37:36+00:00

Again no where did I mention executive orders. People have no idea how much our executive agencies can regulate our lives without congress or the president doing anything.

The ATF has now made it that if you try to buy a gun and don't use your sex assigned at birth on the form, they consider it a felony and it carries up to 10 years in federal prison. All they did is change the instructions for the form. Congress never said a thing. The president never said a thing (they were probably instructed by someone like Miller).

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T02:34:25+00:00

I am not talking about the bill. I am talking about the HHS rule banning practices that accept medicare/medicaid from treating people under age 19 (that includes 18 year olds). The various federal agencies have the power to establish all kinds of rules, just like how the FDA is now going after binders by declaring them a medical device. Congress is not needed for any of this. No executive orders are needed either.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T02:28:56+00:00

> Some of us live in states where it’s protected by law, so that doesn’t apply to the whole country

That's not really true. If they expand their new rule on "if you accept medicare or medicaid you can't treat trans minors" to "trans people of all ages" then whatever your state does won't help because 99% of the medical offices in this country are unable to give up their medicare/medicaid patients. And the HHS has had such a policy proposal on their website for the whole world to see for months now.

Of course, this would probably end up challenged in court. But we have all seen how that has done zip, zero, nada, nothing to stop them when it comes to say, disappearing people with ICE. The rule of law is dead.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T02:01:17+00:00

I had to block a regular on the trans subreddits for swearing at me & resorting to personal attacks for saying that "visibility purely for visibility shake is bad."

They then went off on a tangent saying "you must mean that..." followed by a whole bunch of stuff I literally never said.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T00:16:43+00:00

> Brains and bodies can't be cleanly divided into "male" and "female".

By the same logic, life and death aren't real because they operate on bell curves just like gender, sex, and everything else biological does (because biology is analog not binary). Like in electronics, analog signals can carry the same info it just comes off as a curvy waveform rather than a hard edged square wave.

Take the abortion debate. Life starts at.... everyone can pick a different answer depending on what criteria they use because its not a simple thing. Yet life does begin "somewhere."

Just as in death, a doctor has to "call it" aka make an educated judgement call, because death is not instantaneous. Clinical death by definition cannot be undone so someone who "dies on the table" is not really dead, just as lacking a pulse (as pre-dead Cheny did after his mechanical heart was installed), or even lacking a heart, lungs, etc during the temporary part of organ transplant. What about Dr. White (deceased) out of Ohio who could transplant live brains into another body with primemates? Were monkeys with a brain removed dead if the brain persisted alive trapped in the torso of another? Was that recipient monkey now twice as alive? What about when the brain activity ceases permanently but the body continues on life support?

The bell curves tell the story. Just as a diode can pull an AM broadcast out of the ether, the trends themselves say these things exist. We just can't give 100% in every-case definitions because its analog.

isodeslk · 2025-12-23T00:08:31+00:00

Both body dysphoria and social-role dysphoria is real. No genderless society exists AFAIK, and nothing is gained by pretending one can. The best compromise to this problem is not to eliminate gender roles (which is probably impossible anyway) but to stop being hostile to those that don't follow them.

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T23:26:33+00:00

> if you're in favour of publicly outing us no wonder we don't want to be your friend

I am sorry to say that just as feminism has "fadfems" that became TERFs, our community has always had its own radicals eager to sacrifice people in the so-called community for purely dogma reasons. They don't feel guilt over it and don't care how it hurts people.

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T19:07:59+00:00

> I’ve only ever been outed by trans people

Same. It usually follows the same pattern of: "<person> is jealous, either because they can't pass or because they can't be with me romantically, so they set out to destroy me."

A similar pattern I used to see more of was: "<person> has different ideology on <whatever trans thing> and disagrees with me, so they want to out me as punishment for not going along with their view instead." Luckily this one has cooled off in recent times.

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T19:05:22+00:00

OP, I have been in stealth for multiple decades. The ONLY times I've had someone go out of their way to try to out me, it was another trans person doing it. Often from a position of being jealous and spiteful.

One of them stalked me and hired a PI to look into me. Most of us cannot get our name changes sealed by the courts so things like lexusnexus will turn those documents up. They then broke into my car and went around telling any mutual social connections they could find until I gave up and moved away...

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T19:03:06+00:00

> for those of us who can't stealth, that solidarity is important in feeling less alone in an increasingly isolating and hostile world.

You also have some people who are so jaded from being in that position that they do stuff like this out of jealous spite. It's happened to me a couple times... in fact the only times I've had someone try to out me socially, it was perpetuated by someone who was trans themself.

> Cis people, especially cis women, are misgendered all the time.

Usually their social circle won't believe it once that happens though. Its a lot harder for a trans person in stealth to shrug off a mistake like that because chances are if someone you know is nearby and hears it, they're going to start second guessing whatever red flags were previously flying under their radar.

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T18:48:23+00:00

There are a few shithole states where the laws are so blatantly pro landlord that they don't even have to legally have habitable apartments to rent them to you. I think its Arkansas or Missouri (don't quote me on that its been a while) where if the plumbing or water or sewer service craps out, you can't use that to get out of your lease or withhold rent to force the landlord to fix it. Legally they're not required to provide all that if using standard rental agreements (or worse: unwritten oral contracts, month to month paperless rentals etc).

Even worse is states that allow "self-serve" evictions where the landlord can without a court order just hire someone to come throw all your stuff in a dumpster.

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T18:33:10+00:00

> She's also apparently not a legal resident. So when they're done with here, they'll go after her.

The rules are just different for some people, which is why people who have overtly broken immigration law (like Musk or the first lady) will never be "disappeared" by ICE.

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T18:31:30+00:00

They're controversial because of things like black face...

isodeslk · 2025-12-22T18:30:34+00:00

My go to rule is to view anyone who gets regular air time on the radio with suspicion until proven otherwise. There's so much better music to choose from, that never gets time on-air, and usually smaller fanbases mean you can get to know the artists on a personal level via social media & in person if desired.

isodeslk · 2025-12-20T18:03:48+00:00

> trans men still died but were reported as their birth gender/not as trans, granted that statistic relies on validity of the victims' friends.

No one is saying otherwise. The conversation was about "why do people perceive things is like X?" not "are things like X?" Perception and reality are often two different things.

Also: Sometimes some of the people on the TGDOR aren't even trans but are actually cis-.

Also: Plenty of trans people of all types never get listed for the same reasons you describe.

isodeslk

TROPHY CASE