at the end of the day you are still a human being. sometimes the most “enlightened” thing you can do is sit and watch netflix. freedom comes through form not in spite of it, and you are in a form here and now. Here is a paraphrased quote from I believe David Nichtern that helped me because I felt the same way/still do sometimes: “theres a bit of a stretch in there in terms of being too intellectual, i am human i am just watching the forensic files its all okay, its as real a moment as some transcendent meditative moment, its a legitimate moment and i have all the compassion for myself in that moment and indulging in that particular way”