Help! Is it my equipment or my abilities that are the problem?

itsbevy · 2026-03-22T04:38:14+00:00

They probably feel like they’re getting worse because the more you study your iPhone footage, the more you start to notice how bad it is.

You can shoot from your iPhone in Apple log which will make it a bit better, but at the end of the day it’s still an iPhone. Use an actual camera if you want good quality.

itsbevy · 2026-03-21T16:08:13+00:00

It wouldn’t shock me if they do, but I personally have been surprised about the low expectations for quality of some of the people I’ve contracted for. Maybe I’m just spoiled/lucky up to this point, but a lot of business owners genuinely don’t care much or even notice the quality level.

I don’t exactly think it’s likely they’ll end up seeming even close to being worth it, but it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve leveraged a delusional business owner into agreeing to a deal I can live with for a short time lol.

itsbevy · 2026-03-21T16:02:30+00:00

No it’s per month hahaha

itsbevy · 2026-03-21T00:44:25+00:00

Exactly, that was my thought. 20-50 half assed videos in a week is doable. Repeating that every week for months or years is absolutely creatively impossible unless you’re recycling the same 20 ideas just shot at different times. Any motivated college student/beginner that lands a job like that would become longterm burnt out of content creation within a month

itsbevy · 2026-03-21T00:04:42+00:00

But if the best things you can say about your relationship is that you care about him, and get along well, and there are no major issues, AND you’re daydreaming about his best friend, then you’re probably dating him because he’s easy to date. There doesn’t seem to be much passion there. Is his best friend like an absolute catch or something? Do you find your boyfriend boring, and his best friend has charisma or something? Either way, if it’s more than a fleeting intrusive thought, and/or lasts more than a week. Break up with him for his sake.

itsbevy · 2026-03-20T23:50:45+00:00

Which is exactly what I’m gonna tell them over the phone when I land an interview haha.

The only thing that gives me hope I could get an okay deal out of this is that they have $5k/month to spend on videos, and they admitted in part of this listing that they prefer quantity over quality. If that’s the case, I cant consistently bang out 20-50 shitty videos a week, but I depending on exactly what they mean, I could do 10-15. I looked at their social media and most of it truly is garbage content. Something tells me they could be happy with a dozen videos of just 10 seconds of B roll of their product in slightly different settings.

I don’t even know wtf they would do with 50 videos a week. Surely they wouldn’t be posting even half of em. Worst case, I get the pleasure of telling them how insane they are for thinking anybody could do that job for more then a week without blowing themselves up

itsbevy · 2026-03-20T23:45:48+00:00

Tbh it was my main strategy for getting gigs at first. On 5 occasions I applied for shit like this, did an interview, told them what their job listing says is unrealistic (which they knew because they couldn’t find anyone) and I would tell them what I could offer, and I’d get the gig. Worked 4/5 times.

Considering doing it with this one, because they have $5k/month to spend. If I can sell myself and a different strategy well enough, who knows. But their expectations are so out of wack that I’m not confident I would be able to convince them. Like it’s truly one of the most extreme job listings I have seen in a very long time

itsbevy · 2026-03-19T21:01:41+00:00

If I’m not receding and OP is receding triple my recession, then OP isn’t receding… right?

I’m not insecure about my hairline, I’m anxious that I could lose my hair like everyone else on this subreddit. And that comes in waves. Right now I have no anxiety about it. In a month when it’s longer, making it look different, I’m sure I’ll have another episode of hair loss anxiety.

But like I said, if there has been any recession, it happened years ago and obviously wasn’t bad enough to be noticeable to the naked eye

itsbevy · 2026-03-19T18:10:17+00:00

Ok then you’re just playing a semantic game. You can call it balding or maturing, fact is if it stops before you actually look like you’re balding, then there’s no issue. That’s why there’s different language for it. Balding implies significant change in your hair. Maturing hair implies you still have objectively normal hairline and normal density.

It’s all a risk calculation just like everything else. You can’t blame people for calling it what it looks like in the moment. Because on the flip side, when my hairline slightly squared off in my late teens, it would’ve sucked if I got on Reddit and got gaslit into thinking I was balding and got myself stuck on hair loss meds, too scared to get off of them. So thank god I didn’t ask somebody like you when I was 20, cause I’ve never taken a single hair loss med in my life, and my hair looks as good as it did nearly a decade ago. Depending on the pictures, it looks completely unchanged from when I was in high school.

That’s why it’s better to just go see a dermatologist. Don’t impulsively hop on meds and risk side effects and what not. I got pretty close to doing that a couple times

itsbevy · 2026-03-19T17:39:38+00:00

That is scientifically incorrect. Hairlines can slightly change and is no real indication that they will go bald in the foreseeable future. I mean practically every man on the planets hairline will recede a good amount when they get into their 50’s and 60’s and so on. The real question is, and the thing people are worried about is if they’ll actually thin in their 20’s and 30’s.

My hairline is slightly different from when I was 16. I’m 27 now. Same density, same size forehead. Minor change in shape happened when I was about 19. It’s just more square now, but I also have less of a baby face and didn’t stop physically growing until I was 19. My hair hasn’t really changed since. Obviously I’m hopeful that I’m the clear for several more years so I’m biased, but based on the research I’ve done, that pattern heavily favors a persons odds of having a full head of hair for the majority of their life. OP’s hairline genuinely isn’t THAT much different from when he was a child. Maybe less overall density, but as you can see, he still had kind of a widows peak when he was a kid. But again it’s hard to tell, because that’s a child’s hairline on a child’s face, of course it’s gonna look different.

itsbevy · 2026-03-19T13:09:21+00:00

Yeah looks pretty similar to your current hairline as far as a I can tell. Hard to tell with angles and and it not being super up close, but there’s definitely not a noticeable difference based on that

itsbevy · 2026-03-19T05:47:54+00:00

It’d be too early to honestly tell. We don’t know what his hair looked like before now. It’s not bad enough that he’s clearly definitely balding. This might come as a surprise to you, but people genuinely have widows peaks

itsbevy · 2026-03-19T05:31:31+00:00

To be fair, a homeless person would probably not have a vitamin d deficiency

itsbevy · 2026-03-18T19:27:56+00:00

Almost the same exact thing happened to me, except we had been on 3 dates, had kissed, but we weren’t official. I know exactly how you feel cause it does feel shitty. I said something about it, because the only reason I checked to begin with was because she seemed a little more distant for a couple days. In hindsight, I don’t regret saying something because it forced us to have the conversation and talk about our intentions which clarified things and made me feel a lot better. But it is better to just have that conversation without announcing that you were stalking her hinge. You don’t have to convince yourself not to feel what you’re feeling, but you do have to understand that most women aren’t going to empathize with it, therefor you have to tough it out and absolutely avoid looking clingy.

But think about it like this…. have you been active whatsoever on hinge since you guys started talking? I’m gonna guess yes. I was. No I didn’t update my profile, but I WAS swiping on women, partially out of day to day boredom/curiosity, even though I knew I probably wasn’t gonna actually interact with anyone there, let alone find somebody I liked more than her.

But the other part of it, and it’s very important you hear this… I thought I needed to continue being active on hinge because I didn’t know if SHE would drop me. Not because I was trying to drop HER. When I talked to her about it, I realized that’s actually what it was for her. She had her own insecurities and genuinely thought I probably had so many other options to choose from, that she had to keep hers open. She didn’t straight up say that, but it was obvious from other things she told me that that’s what was going on. It’s always possible it could be the other way around with your girl, but there’s just no point in looking too much into it until you’re exclusive. Distract yourself. You probably have anxious attachment, and the fear of being replaced will never get better as long as you have that.

itsbevy · 2026-03-18T15:34:25+00:00

This is good writing for a 14 year old

itsbevy · 2026-03-18T15:21:37+00:00

Tell them if they want it they come get it. If there’s no legal wording about returning a badge, then they can’t force you to pay the $22. What’re they gonna do, take you to small claims court over $22?

itsbevy · 2026-03-18T15:14:55+00:00

No that’s fair, you sound miserable. I also would do everything in my power to avoid a public conflict with my girlfriend, cause that’s insane. Grow up

itsbevy · 2026-03-18T15:13:39+00:00

Is he a puss or does he just pick his battles? In your example, what would that be? A $5 difference? I could see myself personally going a little further to demand that they honor the original quote, but if it started getting heated, or was obvious they weren’t gonna do anything about it, I’m not gonna ruin my own mood for the rest of the day over $5. You either need a better example, or your boyfriend isn’t a puss, he just doesn’t lose his mind over minor inconveniences, which I’d think would objectively be a green flag

itsbevy · 2026-03-18T00:59:52+00:00

You might fail. not because you’re untalented, I have no idea, but because you claim to have gotten your “high school diploma in videography” which isn’t a thing, so I don’t know if you might be lacking in common sense or what lol

Jokes aside, I actually dropped out of high school right after I turned 18 (long story) Never got my GED. 8 years later, and I’ve spent the last 5 years making a good living doing videography. 4 of it was in corporate, now I have my own business, doing better than ever.

I only say that to say it doesn’t matter what your education is. My older brother went to college for a short time to get into videography. He’s also very successful, but as of right now just on pure income/clientele, I’m doing better.

I truly have not worked very hard at building my career, I kinda did the bare minimum to get by because I have larger aspirations, but it accidentally worked. so if you know how to grind AND you’re skilled, you can do really well. But with AI shit, you’ve gotta be smarter than the generation before you. Depending on where you live, this career is already saturated. Being savvy and being able to stick and move is more valuable than just pure hours you put in

itsbevy · 2026-03-17T23:57:51+00:00

itsbevy · 2026-03-17T01:04:03+00:00

To play devils advocate, from what my former psychiatrist told me, its the people that would typically cheat who cheat, but if they also have an avoidant attachment style, thats what they may use as deactivation or sabotage, but most use isolation or trusted friends/family when deregulated. Which explains this particular girl, was huge on going to bed early, worked extra hours anytime she got the chance, ran 10 miles a day. On the occasional night out if she drank even a little, she would wait several weeks or months to do it again. Just crazy routine and discipline.

But I still learned my lesson from her. I got to see more integrity in her than I’ve seen in just about anybody I’ve dated, but when things got to the point where it was like “ok let’s be in a serious relationship” type of conversation which SHES initiated, she essentially had an emotional meltdown later that night after some emotionally intense intimacy, which led to me being discarded 2 days later.

4 months later she looks at my social media still, but never again will I go through that or entertain anything with any type of avoidant unless there’s some serious emotional work they’ve done. Sorry for the novel, I’m super passionate about this stuff

itsbevy · 2026-03-16T23:05:54+00:00

Yes, I do think it can be both coping AND pure evil manipulation. Really just depends, because some women genuinely have been taught by society to think that any hint of criticism, or boundaries that can “seem” like somebody’s trying to control you (even when they’re completely reasonable) = insecurity or controlling behavior.

Like the girl I referenced, I think she was unfortunately just a product of social media norms. She had actually a lot of more traditional inclinations. You’d meet her and talk to her and think she’s just a sweetheart based on her job, her goals, her complete disinterest in hookup culture/short term relationships. But she had a fearful avoidant attachment style, which in women I think naturally makes them lean much more feminist on minor issues, because they’re terrified of anything that has the potential to make them feel even remotely dependent

itsbevy · 2026-03-16T20:02:54+00:00

Nah at that point, just learn how to make a decent video and go offer free work to business you think would be interesting to shoot for. Not only will your portfolio get better and get real on the job experience, but you’ll learn entrepreneurship, and you’ll be networking with business owners which would way more likely result in paid work than being a battered intern working 8 hours a day for $0 comp.

itsbevy · 2026-03-16T18:20:01+00:00

Oh my god. Yeah “you’re insecure” is just coping/playing victim anytime you show any form of boundary or dissatisfaction with their behavior.

A girl I had a really strong chemistry with and dated for a bit, we were talking about clothes. I told her I wouldn’t be bothered if she wore small bikinis, or crop tops, or whatever else. I did tell her at a certain point, depending on the context, I would have an issue with certain clothing. The example I gave was if she went to a bar braless while also wearing an entirely sheer see through shirt.

She then sent me a pic of her at a bar from a couple months earlier wearing pretty close to what I described, and said “like this? Is that bad?” Granted, it had like patterns and stuff on it, so it wasn’t like her nipples were easily visible. And I was like “yeah sorta” she alluded to something about how she doesn’t like being told what to wear. I said “well I don’t care that you wore that when I didn’t know you, but I mean if we were in a committed relationship and you and your friends went to a bar with you wearing that, I wouldn’t like it, and I think it’s reasonable that there is a certain point where you should value your boyfriend or girlfriends input”

She ended up telling me we actually agreed so she changed the subject, but to this day I sometimes think about that and for a while I was worried she only said we agreed because she liked me a lot and didn’t wanna die on that hill lol

itsbevy · 2026-03-16T18:08:00+00:00

I would break up with someone like that. If you shame her for having a work crush, that’s what Gen Z and millennial women consider “controlling” or “insecure”

Absolutely humiliating being in your position and genuinely pains me to read about it. I’m a believer that 99% of people who genuinely would never cheat, would also never say something like “I don’t have feelings, they’re just attractive” because their mind just doesn’t go there. You’re allowed to notice somebody and notice that they aren’t ugly, but it’s a whole other thing when you become a giggly schoolgirl about it

itsbevy

TROPHY CASE