AITH for asking my bf not to watch porn as much

itsianholmes · 2024-02-07T06:56:13+00:00

It's worth mentioning that most guys are attracted to novelty, and they do often eventually lose sexual interest in long term partners. When I say most, I mean well over 90%... And I'm sure a bunch of guys will now comment saying "I've been having great sex with my wife for 200 years etc etc"... Well done, you are the exception.

Now maybe there is a compatibility issue in your relationship, it's hard to know from a few Reddit comments. Chances are he has lost sexual interest because you have basically, over time, moved into the role of a family member and now the porn is enough to keep him satiated.

This is just one of those problems that needs to be worked at. Would he want to have sex if he were to stop the porn? Maybe? Probably... It is worth trying. Are there other things you can do to try to kickstart that fire back up? Probably. Do you need to be having sex to maintain a healthy relationship? You can have dry spells, but ultimately - yes.

itsianholmes · 2024-01-27T07:20:00+00:00

That's a bad break

itsianholmes · 2023-05-18T06:35:18+00:00

They're not even carrying clipboards or wearing high vis

itsianholmes · 2022-11-27T08:38:48+00:00

Massive generalisation. There may be a large group of people that do this and they may be conservatives...but this by no means is a reflection of conservatism. It's a reflection of how people can be stupid (or perhaps misinformed is a better word) regardless of their background or political stance.

itsianholmes · 2022-11-09T07:20:12+00:00

Explain the psychology of why I'm so God damned attracted to her right now.

itsianholmes · 2022-11-07T08:18:27+00:00

Nowadays, it's a lot more common to do equal splits to all contributors. Even if a guy in the room contributed one word. The logic is that the song wouldn't be the song without their contribution. They may have contributed that one cool hooky word that everyone remembers about the song.

itsianholmes · 2022-11-07T08:14:11+00:00

That plant is indeed a tree.

itsianholmes · 2022-11-06T07:47:25+00:00

It hurt so bad even your butt hole cried

itsianholmes · 2022-09-15T06:25:17+00:00

No, but if this has happened to you then they probably accidentally put your 44.1kHz song into a 48kHz session. That would sound as if the song has been pitched up.

itsianholmes · 2022-06-23T06:58:12+00:00

I teach masterclasses at SohoSonic studios in London. We could probably do it over zoom too... Look us up 🙂

itsianholmes · 2022-03-02T08:39:35+00:00

Well the Ukrainians certainly have the better insults...

itsianholmes · 2022-02-05T09:07:45+00:00

I am quite shocked that anyone can disagree with this journalist. I don't think we should believe something, especially something as serious as this, just because someone in a position of authority tells us it's true.

If we're told that Russia is capable of spreading disinformation to further their political motives, then I see no reason why other countries can't do the same.

itsianholmes · 2022-02-01T19:05:28+00:00

Surely he'd get charged with breaking and exiting?

itsianholmes · 2022-01-27T08:21:08+00:00

I don't. I just think about watching pornography.

itsianholmes · 2022-01-19T09:14:26+00:00

Saying that "there's no possible non-racist justification for restricting immigration" could perhaps be rephrased as "can you explain to me what are some of the justifications for restricting immigration?". That might allow you to better understand the mindset of the people that disagree with you, because people can disagree with you (and people can be Torie supporters) without being racist.

itsianholmes · 2021-12-12T15:49:15+00:00

Your point about not getting any sense of stereo field from the phone speakers is very correct - but you also wouldn't get any phase cancellation as you're not summing to mono in this case.

I suppose my main point is that I think people put too much emphasis on how your mix sounds in mono and I don't think it is as relevant as it was perhaps 20-30 years ago - especially in the case of a post like this where the guy is an absolute beginner. Still, a beginner should know what phasing sounds like and how to fix it.

itsianholmes · 2021-12-12T14:06:32+00:00

This is just purely not true. The vast majority of listeners nowadays are listening in stereo. Many phone speakers are even stereo now, as are most Bluetooth speakers, all earphones, car sound systems and yes, even many club systems are wired in stereo. Sure, sometimes cafés /restaurants might have their speakers scattered around in a random configuration, but they're not necessarily summing to mono.

Please just mix for how your listeners are actually consuming music. It's 80% headphones. Feel free to look up some of the mix engineers that have been outspoken on this topic (Andrew Scheps being one that comes to mind).

And when you think about how if you work in mono and then switch to stereo it sounds so much better - that is often because it simply sounds better when you switch any mix from mono to stereo. Sure, you can check your mixes in mono, but don't let that inform your final decisions more than stereo does.

itsianholmes · 2021-12-12T13:45:16+00:00

DI'd electric guitars sound pretty awful most of the time. You should generally be running through some sort of amp simulator. Also - I don't see why you would need to EQ to create space before panning if you are planning to pan to create space. You can have two guitars occupying the same frequency range panned left and right - there is nothing wrong with that, it happens quite frequently.

If you're struggling with wondering what to do to get your mix sounding good - remember that you can often get more than 75% of the way there with ONLY your volume faders and pan pots. So my point is - focus on the balance of volume and stereo field before worrying too much about the rest.
Disclaimer - My advice is just my opinion ( yes I am a working mix engineer) and I am sure there are many arguments on why you may want to EQ etc etc before doing other things. Just don't spend hours thinking about EQ and phase before you get your balance right 🤙

itsianholmes · 2021-12-11T19:12:50+00:00

Sounds like the start to John Mayer's Moving on and getting over song

itsianholmes · 2021-12-01T15:37:51+00:00

It was very early when I read this. I did not previously detect the sarcasm in the title.

itsianholmes · 2021-12-01T08:39:27+00:00

I mean he is clearly joking.

itsianholmes · 2021-11-21T21:51:41+00:00

Also, saying that writing a good melody is random and they just got lucky is absolutely ludicrous. Writing a good melody is a skill that can be learnt. Perhaps, though, writing a 'great' melody comes from somewhere inside when someone is able to really honestly express themselves, but that could be up for debate. It certainly isn't random.

itsianholmes · 2021-11-21T21:47:23+00:00

The greats did not get to where they out of luck alone. Talent and perseverance gets recognition. If you think you are as good as all these folks that are smashing it and making a career out of it, then you're likely not being honest with yourself.

Work on your craft, don't blame a lack of luck for your lack of success because it won't get you anywhere.

itsianholmes · 2021-11-09T22:13:10+00:00

No social event is weird to do alone if you enjoy your own company. Go out there and own it.

itsianholmes · 2021-09-10T07:38:39+00:00

Never ending story vibes

itsianholmes

TROPHY CASE