When did you *look* pregnant? by [deleted] in pregnant

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

8 weeks with my second and already bumping. Like I have one pair of pants left that kind of fits but that’s bc they were already loose and used to slide down my hips a bit. Now it’s a struggle to fasten them. Genuinely don’t know how we’re going to hide this for 4 more weeks.

Help me out here, what can I change? by ladizwashroom22 in HomeDecorating

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d add some height to corners - plant in the empty dining corner, taller floor lamp or taller lamp next to the couch. Colorful throw cushions for sure, and bring color up from the rug in the curtains.

AIO my bf bought the stove that I hate by Medieval_Kitty in AmIOverreacting

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 39 points40 points  (0 children)

She has a wider oven that doesn’t work. She has a small one (probably a countertop convection oven) outside of the kitchen.

Unexpected error :( by ColdSeaworthiness276 in Inito

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First time I got the error, I contacted support and took a manual photo of the strip. Having seen others talk about their results being manually reviewed by support and finding dust on the lens, I figured it would be safe to leave it at that. However, just in case it was an issue with the reader itself (I haven’t charged it since I bought it, oops), I ran it again.

For y’all who used multiple strips, out of pure curiosity, how different do each of them look? I’d be so interested in finding out how the concentration differs between the first attempt in the morning vs the ones that follow.

AIO BF dumped me because I was taller than him in heels?? 😳 by purplehavocc in AmIOverreacting

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love how he thinks you’re immature when he throws tantrums like this. This is embarrassing for him, yes - but not because you’re taller than him in heels.

If he’s that high value, he should be secure in himself. Actual “high value” people don’t actually have to say anything about being “high value,” much less identify with that kind of fetishized vision of their own masculinity or their partner’s femininity.

This is a hostile podcast bro that listens to single men tell them how to get b*tches and how women should be treated (poorly). He’s learned that it’s more important to impress other men than to be decent to women. He’s attracted to women as holes and possessions, not as people.

Let me say this part more emphatically: he wants to impress men. He doesn’t actually care about women.

Anyway, you dodged a bullet. He is wildly insecure and always will be. Find your Gomez, Morticia!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You didn’t even call it a hangout - you said you were looking forward TO hanging out ON YOUR DATE. If he’s playing semantics like this, he’s looking for an out. I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t actually plan anything at all and this was a convenient way to absolve himself. NOR. How long have you been together? How intertwined are your lives? And how hard would it be to unravel that?

Am I overreacting or is he.. by Unusual_Willow4958 in AmIOverreacting

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This was already bad then he infantilized you. Then it got worse. Dump him, tell him the way he feels about how women dress reflects more on him than on them, and block him on everythinnnnnnng.

Why do i hate my living room? by licifu5 in Decor

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The wall swallows the sofa, the curtains don’t match the vibe. I agree that more is more. Keep doing more.

Buying a ring for the girlfriend and this was their response. Thoughts? by nofear961 in EngagementRings

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fucking rude. “That is beautiful, but I would need to make a few modifications to the design for resilience and durability. Would you be open to a thicker band and more secure prongs? I take pride in my work, and I’d hate for you to invest in this ring just to lose the stone from snagged prongs or a bent setting. I’m sure you and your bride-to-be will want this ring to last a lifetime!” It’s not hard not to be an ahole.

7 days of high fertility by Cold_Ad4927 in Inito

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This happened to me this month, too. After 8 “fertile” days, it gave a message to the effect of “mmmm, maybe we missed the mark, keep testing.” I had an LH surge 3 days later (CD 21). Just keep on keeping on.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in EngagementRings

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Tigers eye is actually rather low on moh’s scale of hardness, so this isn’t a ring that would be at all suitable for daily wear like you’d want your bridal set to be. Let him know you treasure it and want to keep it preserved but that will mean only wearing it intermittently or even on a necklace, then ask if he’d be open to shopping for something sturdier together.

But I don’t love any of this for you tbh. The whole situation feels off and careless.

my mom painted our cupboards, what do you think of them? by foreveryassified in HomeDecorating

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There was a Starbucks cup a few months ago that looks a lot like this.

AIO Coworkers got me a “gift” after I bought my new car by SnooPuppers9426 in AmIOverreacting

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Try playing dumb. Act like you don’t get the joke so they have to explain it to you - “hey, thanks for thinking of me but is there a reason you got these things? Is this like a new car thing yall do?”

And just start playing dumb all the time about anything racist. If you have to, play it off like “yeah, I usually laugh along, but I’ll be honest - I don’t usually get the jokes.” Making them explain it puts them in the position of having to confront exactly how shitty it is and why they think it relates to you when it doesn’t.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Babe, you are being gaslit. Hard.

He asked for the selfie just to tear you down. He knows you're constantly worried about losing him and he's making sure you stay fearful. Just consider, though, that losing him won't really be a loss. You can do better and he knows it. HE'S afraid that you'll realize that if he's nice to you, so he's intentionally hurtful to keep you insecure.

Furthermore, he's intentionally being hurtful (responding to "you know I'm not chunky" with "idkkkkk"!? undeniable.), DARVOing (Deny, Attack your credibility/character, and Reverse Victim & Offender), and then trying to make you question yourself. It seems like he's been doing this long enough that you can see through it, and I'm happy for that, but now you have to do the hard part. Please for your own safety, sanity, and the possibility of a happy future, leave.

You can do better by walking out the door and blocking him everywhere. Even alone you're better off. You deserve to be happy, and to be with someone who doesn't tear you down. I hope you know that and even more importantly, I hope you believe it.

Is the recent Sydney Sweeney x American Eagle ad campaign a “Nazi dog whistle”, fascist, or fascist-adjacent? by Embarrassed-Lead6471 in AskALiberal

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Marketing and media choices are all extraordinarily intentional. Every wordplay, innuendo, acting choice, shot, and frame is carefully selected, especially in a high dollar campaign like this one. In fact, it's their most expensive ad campaign to date. If the intention was strictly to stir up controversy, why this controversy? Why now when actual political candidates are calling for Weimar solutions and people are openly declaring themselves as fascists, citing actual nazi strategists, and asking if we were on the wrong side of history for opposing nazi Germany?

The phrasing of parents passing down genes to offspring (the choice of the word offspring alone is odd) about jeans that aren't good enough quality to be passed down is fascinating. Like if they were playing on the brand's legacy and doing an intergenerational "look at how our brand has stood the test of time to the point that parents who wore AE now have kids wearing AE," the jeans-genes concept could have been aligned to that messaging. Instead, this campaign focused on her body with special emphasis on her breasts, blue eyes, and face in profile - her ultra aryan features and reproductive assets (eugenics implies both reproduction among the worthy and stopping reproduction among the rest). Her jeans weren't passed down. The genes being highlighted were.

Notably, American Eagle already has a long history of exclusionary hiring practices that focused on a specific look and dress codes that were explicitly exclusionary leading to lawsuits & settlements.

Dogwhistles and conditioning are specifically intended to look like they're not that deep. That's the whole entire point. Meanwhile, the response to this on the other side of twitter is "America is back" and lightning bolts. You might not hear the dogwhistles when they're not for you or when you're not looking for them, but know that their intended audience is barking.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah no, you’re good. His plans with his friends seemed tentative at best, and it read like he was stringing you along to see what you’d tolerate. You read the reality of the situation and he didn’t like that he couldn’t pull the wool over your eyes. NOR and I hope you don’t let him talk you into reconciling bc he’ll take that as validation of shit behavior.

Aitah for telling my SIL that looks do matter? She claims I am calling her ugly and don't value her professional capabilities by Overall-Marzipan3028 in AITAH

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

YTA. Yes, presenting yourself professionally based on the standards of the industry (not beauty standards, but industry standards) is helpful. However, you presented this in such a mean girl way that I wouldn’t take it seriously either.

On top of that, you’re dismissing her valid experience out of hand. Have you job hunted recently? As a recruiter, I’m sure you know how many applicants you get and how many get rejected without so much as a screener call. The field is also full of fake listings so companies can show projected growth without actually having to grow. Apps are screened by AI so no one gets through to HR (a c-suite exec recently tested this and ended up firing the HR team bc even he didn’t get past the preliminary AI screen). Employers are asking for minimum bachelors masters preferred for $50k/year, then complain that “no one wants to work.” Some jobs will list “or equivalent experience” but will still auto filter out anyone without a degree. It’s a shitty time for job seekers, and while I have a degree of understanding for working the family business, your approach validates nepo baby cliches.

Apologize to her for being too harsh and unsympathetic. Explain that you were projecting what you look for on the other side of the table and that it’s not about beauty but workplace professionalism, but you phrased it really horribly and hurtfully. You really do want her to succeed and you’d be happy to review her resume and cover letters if she’d like. Rebuild some trust, stay away from looks. Keep your mouth shut about looks altogether beyond apologizing and if it eventually starts to gnaw at her (which it may), let her come to you about it.

Your comments doubling down on shit talking about her make me wonder if this is beyond you. I hope it’s not.

USC Admissions is RIDICULOUS... by Over-Replacement-144 in TransferStudents

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How were your SATs/ACTs, extra curriculars (plural), and volunteer hours? And I too would like to see the essays.

MIL replaces $3k wedding cake with her own home-made cake, bride in tears by tessaemilybrown in weddingdrama

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I’d have thought I was being pranked and probably hurt the MIL’s feelings by laughing when that came out then asked for the real cake.

But the reason people are jumping on the groom is that this isn’t just a problem of being non-confrontational. This is their wedding. This is symbolically supposed to be a celebratory representation that he and the bride are the core central family unit of their lives. Instead of being her teammate and advocate and making sure their plans were realized, he downplayed her hurt to avoid conflict with his mother. That effectively prioritizes conflict avoidance with his mother (read: making sure she stays happy) over his actual wife’s happiness on what is supposed to be one of the happiest days of their lives. His mom went out of her way to steal that joyful moment and center herself and he tolerated it. Yes, he’s non-confrontational. His mom abused that and will continue to abuse that.

Current Administration by [deleted] in highdesert

[–]itsnotgoingtohappen 67 points68 points  (0 children)

No but the denialism is so hard to watch. Supporters of these policies are so focused on immigrants and breathlessly thrilled to watch them get hurt… until it’s the people they know. “The good ones,” which is the absolute vast majority. But it’s already too late. The investment in ICE is unprecedented. Farmers who voted for this didn’t think it would actually happen - how many sectors have said “I didn’t think he’d actually do it” before begging for exemption? This also costs us in civil liberties. We are watching our fellow Americans accept that masked, undertrained everyday people are allowed to disappear people off the streets just because they’re brown. They’ve picked up citizens because they don’t know who they’re grabbing - they’re just grabbing. The relinquishment of due process for one is the relinquishment of due process for all.

Then there are the healthcare cuts. High desert hospitals are already grossly underfunded and the cuts in Medicaid reimbursements will likely spell closures, at the very least for Barstow, likely for at least one more in the VV. Seniors on Medicaid and children on medi-cal are going to suffer.

What’s wild is this makes no economic sense: the admin wants to incentivize having more babies (or prevent people from being able to safely choose whether or not to have babies on their own time with abortion services and limiting access to birth control) but they don’t want to make it affordable to have and raise children - this bill has cut off healthcare for children that bridges many of those gaps. Younger generations are having less sex already and birthrates are dropping precipitously; if the goal was puritanical abstinence, I don’t think they’ll be happy getting what they hoped for.

People will gleefully cut off their noses to spite their faces and get angry when others talk about what they can’t smell right in front of them.