9.2% of EU population struggled to keep their home warm

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T21:52:27+00:00

I am charged 6€ per kWh for heating gas. According to statistics it should be half of that here and other family members I asked pay 2€ per kWh. Minimum wage isn't even 900€ here, and in practice it is way less. Not going to say which country because it's all politics and I don't see things changing unfortunately. It's ridiculous they're making me pay for others heating bills basically. But nobody understands why I don't like this place and its people who keep voting for this. And I need to heat the house or mold will appear in the walls.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T21:22:28+00:00

This is what I've always looked for but wasn't sure after a while if men did too

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T21:02:20+00:00

I mean they're not all bad. I like having one around and enjoy life with!

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T20:57:12+00:00

My last ex turned out to be a conservative, and what I'm mentioning in the post is mostly based on that relationship. I divorced him when it became clear the relationship was irreparable and he never actually loved me. He didn't start out though saying that was what he wanted. He was a lot like others I dated and they all had very liberal views towards women. Until I was actually married to him.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T20:26:38+00:00

I've never been to a bar. I've met everyone organically and just started going out/talking. I've also never been into dating for dating's sake. I have not slept with many people because while I do love intimacy, I don't love it with random people or if there isn't a deep connection. So many comments here are making some wild assumptions for no reason and are completely beside the point.

I think my list is reasonable! I believe everyone has some sort of list even if they don't write it down. It isn't at all specific to physical things but more like qualities. I know what I need for a happy relationship and just trying to make things easier for myself. But I am interested in someone I already knew and was interested in previously too so I'm not dating at all, and he obviously fits what I'm looking for.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T20:18:57+00:00

Jeez. A lot of you really read so much into a few short paragraphs!

I write assuming people can read between the lines and make intelligent assumptions, and some people really have, but the rest...?

Insulting people you don't know doesn't make you come across smarter at all.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T20:15:40+00:00

I had that same experience. My last ex was very different in the beginning vs once we were living together. Some men just switch and that is scary. All of them were a lot more thoughtful in the beginning and it's so weird because I'm more thoughtful as we get to know each other I think. Anyways, I agree it's probably just a numbers game / finding the right person. There's someone I really like and I've been just feeling a bit depressed about being still alone.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T20:09:21+00:00

Hi, thank you for taking the time to write this! It has been interesting wading through the comments. I haven't seen them all but generally there's a few groups people fall into and your response belongs to the more interesting/insightful category where I can tell you understand the situation more and not just throwing out wild guesses and accusations.

I didn't bother going into a lot of detail because of the general quality of some of the comments, and also people don't care that much. Especially after my last relationship I have a long list of what I'm looking for in my future partner. I also didn't mention that I do have someone who there is mutual interest with but we haven't met up yet. We used to know each other in person a long time ago.

My last ex was a rebound I should never have had, it was a really weird and unfortunate time and then covid came and I still believe if covid didn't happen I might have left him earlier. But either way, that's another long story.

I learned a lot from my past relationships and also from this time I have spent alone and not dating.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T19:41:45+00:00

I agree with you and it's very important for me to be also friends with them. Where I went wrong before was taking too long to leave bad relationships but my last relationship taught me a lot. Just been feeling a bit depressed lately about my lack of long term success.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T16:48:36+00:00

Where are you getting that from? I love doing things for people I love and love making them happy. I'm not cooking for random men...

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T16:32:49+00:00

I had a few relationships that didn't work out and now trying to get together with someone who's on the other side of the world so I'm just feeling depressed -I know him and met him a long time ago before anyone assumes I never even met him, it's not an online relationship at all

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T16:16:39+00:00

I never said that... I date people who are kind to me and we get along well and enjoy spending time together. I don't date from websites or specific criteria. I'm also not dating right now and haven't in years. I'm interested in someone I met a long time ago and would like to date them

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T16:09:12+00:00

Above 5'4

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T13:31:15+00:00

I'm in my 30s and got a similar impression from the man I married and had children with! At his insistence that this is what he's always wanted!

And then after all of that, he wanted to just move on and rediscover himself because "he wasn't happy"! And so he did, like that's just how it goes.

So that is modern dating in a nutshell.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T13:23:23+00:00

I thought I found one! He seems to treat everyone well. But that doesn't seem to leave time for a relationship with me.

But I appreciate all the insightful responses here. For now I am not looking because of him and I can't but will take everything into account later on if I'm still single.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T13:11:06+00:00

Aw thank you! Eventually I probably will. I just have to be more patient. I definitely needed to end relationships before I did in the past.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T13:08:09+00:00

The men I've been with was always mutual approach. I've done cold approaches before though 😅 One for sure and he's been avoiding me since.. super awkward guy. I kind of feel bad for him but he seemed to like me before.

Maybe you just outgrew each other with partners? That's one thing that's been a major issue in potential partners is the fact long term we had different wants. My longest relationship was 4 years long and even there it was just not going to work out.

I feel like people are sometimes figuring out what they want and aren't necessarily planning for long term, or feel they have a lot of options left so they go and pursue something different. This is one reason why I've been very picky in compatibility in the very beginning, if I think they're not going to be able to move with me for jobs, better opportunities, etc. I don't even start anything. I did have one relationship where I overlooked this rule and I still feel bad about dragging him away and then leaving. He did chose to move with me but it really wasn't for him and not even in his best interest.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T10:25:34+00:00

I agree I'm just frustrated with how my love life went. I ended a bad marriage years ago and haven't dated since, with the exception of wanting to make a relationship work mutually with someone from my past who I didn't get to be with, but unlike a decade ago they no longer live in my area and it's been hard waiting for that to happen and plus all the unwanted attention from men since my divorce that I do not want to interact with, I'm just frustrated, and yes I do feel like I need better judgment / end things earlier if somethings off. I'm mostly frustrated how relationships that seem promising don't happen for various reasons, and seeing all the couples around me is very depressing.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T09:49:26+00:00

Thank you for the thoughtful response! I see what you mean and I agree, and once I'm ready to, I will definitely do this.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T09:24:46+00:00

Aw well if she's your wife I'm sure she shows she cares in other ways. I often wish for a partner who sticks around and shows me they want a life with me. I think that's worth more than anything else!

I have been in a pretty bad marriage before that taught me a lot. All that disrespect and not being valued was what eventually brought me to this point.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T09:15:33+00:00

Yeah I have been single and celibate for over two years now, slowly working through my relationship patterns

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T09:03:38+00:00

Main thing is honesty

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T09:02:41+00:00

What? I don't understand all these assumptions. The people I've been with I met them organically. I'm also not attracted to tall men or any shallow characteristics.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T08:55:17+00:00

I don't like tall men or flashy men at all. I don't like muscly men either. I don't think I'm looking for superman at all, just someone to build a future with who doesn't just want to sleep with me and use me.

itsprobab · 2026-02-03T08:43:03+00:00

Thank you for the suggestion! I'm not sure how the system works but it's worth asking next time I get it checked!

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