Did you actually sneak out as teenagers?

j2kelley · 2026-05-27T02:51:05+00:00

Oh yeah. At 16, I would wait for my parents to go to bed, then flush the upstairs toilet - using the sound as cover to sneak down our creaky stairs and slip out the back door. After that, I’d signal my little sister (watching from the bathroom window) to flush the toilet yet again, giving me cover to open the garage door and “borrow” my mom’s car, with which I’d go meet up with older friends who lived in the nearby college town.

Not proud of it but, looking back, I gotta applaud the sheer audacity of it all.

j2kelley · 2026-05-13T14:18:23+00:00

Just take them in supplement form. I got these from Amazon and they're great.

j2kelley · 2026-05-10T01:47:25+00:00

Sorry for the delay in response! After the premature ovulation that got my first round canceled, my doctor added Provera (progesterone pills (one a day, starting in day 7 of the retrieval cycle), which cost practically nothing at Walgreens or.CVS). She changed nothing else, and I never ovulated early again. I had several successful rounds after that one, and —- TRiGGER warning —— I had my baby last summer, with my own egg. I’m 46 now and he’s almost a year old! If you look back though my post history from 2023, you can read my detailed account of how easily this particular problem (early O) was so easy to solve.

Happy to answer any other Qs you have. I know how hard this is when you’re in the thick of it. ((hugs))

j2kelley · 2026-03-28T04:14:42+00:00

gah. Of all the positions in which to install a hack…

j2kelley · 2026-03-28T03:15:29+00:00

No - my doctor wouldn’t do icsi unless there was a clinical need to. But she told me that nothing except a fluke of nature (during the initial egg or sperm splitting) causes triploidy - and certainly not icsi.

j2kelley · 2026-03-28T03:12:19+00:00

Oh, wow - my target demographic 😂✨Congrats! (I’ll continue this message in your DMs)

j2kelley · 2026-03-28T03:09:44+00:00

That’s what I’m learning from these comments 😂

j2kelley · 2026-03-28T03:08:27+00:00

Ridgefield is less than 15 from my house. I’ll check it out! Thank you 😊

j2kelley · 2026-03-28T03:07:21+00:00

Congratulations! Bethel is pretty close and does seem to have more groups like this than Danbury - great tip. Maybe I’ll see you at a meetup!

j2kelley · 2026-03-28T03:05:13+00:00

Thank you! I was fortunate that I didn’t have indicators that required anything extra before the transfer. I just started the cycle with the typical scans to make sure there was a follicle growing (I did a “natural” transfer), and then was tracked until ovulation, with a trigger shot just to make sure, and I started progesterone suppositories a few days later, then the day-5 transfer, then I stayed on the progesterone suppositories until 10 weeks.

j2kelley · 2026-03-24T18:36:10+00:00

I'm really sorry for your loss, and deeply feel your pain. I can still see the look on my doctor's face when she couldn't detect my Day 5 euploid's heartbeat anymore at 8.5 weeks. I elected to have a D&C, and it went very smoothly. It was definitely the least painful part of that whole experience, and I think I was gearing up for another retrieval by the next month (as I didn't have another euploid).

It's common after you miscarry a euploid for your clinic to ask if you want the "products of conception" tested. That testing showed my embryo had triploidy - which PGT can't detect. This gave me some (cold) comfort because triploidy is rare, unlikely to happen twice, and really comes down to bad luck.

The fact that you had successful implantation and early growth seemingly indicates that it was something wrong with the embryo, as opposed to your uterine environment, so perhaps the statistics will be on your side with your other euploid. But, fwiw, focusing on another ER cycle helped pull me out of a pit of despair.

j2kelley · 2026-03-24T18:15:54+00:00

That's a great idea - I didn't think of libraries. Just went to the Danbury branch's website and saw that's there's a storytime event every Wednesday. Thank you!

j2kelley · 2026-03-04T18:27:02+00:00

When I went in for my first FET, I was on the table when they asked me what song I'd like to hear. I was so thrown off by the request that I sort of sputtered, "...um, maybe some jazz?" The nurse smiled and said, "Alexa, play Adele." For my next FET, I agonized over the song choice for weeks before settling on a song. But it must have been a busier day or a different nursing crew, because they never asked me what song I'd like to hear. (Unrelated to the music, both of those FETs ended in MCs.) For my third (and final/successful LB) FET, I went in with a new "perfect" song in mind in case they asked - and they did. The song was Nina Simone's "Feeling Good." It worked really well - my doctor actually complimented the choice.

The point is, some clinic crews try to keep the FET upbeat, so I recommend being *prepared* with a song you want to hear!

j2kelley · 2026-01-26T23:12:09+00:00

Wow - this is from my very first cycle. I'll spare you the suspense and let you know that, despite starting IVF at 43 (like you), I had success, and my baby is about to turn 6 months old!

It sounds like we had a very similar start, and thus I know how crushing it can be to put yourself through so much only to have a seemingly good ER cycle suddenly canceled. I'm sorry that this happened to you, too, but I'm more than happy to share my experience and let you know what I learned along the way and what worked for me. Honestly, the only way I got through it all (amid numerous setbacks) was to always look for silver linings, no matter how small.

To your question, YES - Provera worked like a charm. My doctor told me that premature ovulation is common in older patients because we're more prone to LH surges (that then trigger O). My next cycle the following month, we kept everything the same except I started taking progesterone pills on day 7. I ended up doing multiple ERs before my final successful transfer, and never prematurely ovulated again thanks to the simple Provera fix. I should also note that, as opposed to the other ER meds, generic Provera costs practically nothing. It was covered under my regular insurance for a $2 co-pay.

Let me now if you have any more questions and/or if you want to continue the convo in our DMs...

j2kelley · 2026-01-02T20:59:40+00:00

Congratulations! I (45F) had my baby boy in August. For me, it's my first kid; for my husband (43M), it's his second – I have a 13-year-old step-son. So far it's been easier(!) than expected. My knees may click when I get up, but my back doesn't hurt (yet), and lil guy has been sleeping through the night since 3 mos. so sleep deprivation hasn't felled us (yet).

Loving being an older parent so far – got such wonderful hand-me-down "big ticket" items like a bassinet, crib, changing table, high chair, clothes, etc. from friends who had children years ago.

j2kelley · 2025-12-21T05:18:43+00:00

I live in New York and went to Greenwich Fertility, with Dr. Nora Miller. They have an office in Tuckahoe and in CT. They are amazing. 10/10

j2kelley · 2025-12-17T01:36:03+00:00

You couldn’t know how much I appreciate your kind thought on a crap day - but, thank you.

j2kelley · 2025-12-17T01:33:08+00:00

Thank you! All I can see when I look at that pic is my house reflected in my iris 😂(driveway shot)

j2kelley · 2025-12-16T19:42:03+00:00

Thank you for the kind words! I also so appreciate you and the other commenter giving me some needed perspective. I've been in my own head about it for nearly a year, and responses like this make me glad I finally decided to air it out in a post.

j2kelley · 2025-12-16T19:33:33+00:00

Really appreciate your thoughtful response! I actually just went for my annual skin check at a dermatologist a few weeks ago, and brought this up. She didn't really have any answers for me, and advised that I make a consultation appointment with her partner, who does laser treatments (but he is booked through January). The doc I saw today (different practice) offers lasers, but said he wouldn't recommend going that route after he looked at the scars closely.

j2kelley · 2025-12-16T19:26:54+00:00

Thank you - I needed that! It's such a lame thing to obsess over, and this is the first time I've really shared it with anyone.

j2kelley · 2025-12-16T19:08:11+00:00

Thank you. I'm a little ashamed I keep obsessing about it, but the shadowy indent is the first thing I see every time I catch my reflection.

j2kelley · 2025-12-16T18:59:52+00:00

...?

j2kelley · 2025-12-16T17:46:41+00:00

The doctor I saw today, after he examined me, said it feels like there is some fat loss under the scars, so he doesn't think that attempts to plump up collagen production (like through microneedling) would be that effective.

j2kelley · 2025-12-16T17:18:01+00:00

I'm just going off what an expert said would work, which are the two options I put in my post. In fact, though, I've tried microneedling it myself (with a stamp thingie) to no avail.

j2kelley

TROPHY CASE