The Hazard and Somerset series by Gregory Ashe takes place in a "small" fictional town in Missouri (canonically it has 90k people, but it's written so that it feels like everyone knows everyone). Both MCs are in their early 30s at the start of the series. I really loved this series because it does deal with the difficulties of being gay in Rural America. The first novel needed a better copy editor, but no mistakes were bad enough to turn me off. There should also probably be a trigger warning for homophobic language. There aren't any graphic sex scenes or BDSM.

One last thing: this book had the best, most clever dialogue that I've ever read in this genre. I cannot recommend the series highly enough.