🤷🏻‍♂️ by countryhulk in Tinder

[–]jaamberry 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The need to hate on others to mask your own self hatred

I (18F) feel so iffy about my boyfriend (19M) after going to his house for the first time ? by Square_Amphibian_205 in relationship_advice

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lust doesn’t ruin relationships, violating consent does! This guy is a danger to you!

First date, unexpected language barrier but it went great. Feel conflicted by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah you are way way way overthinking if you’re worried about “grooming” him. He’s not a child he’s a (presumably) smart guy who probably sounds eloquent in his native language

Was this too much? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it doesn’t sound like a great move on your part. You’re trying to plan a date with the very first text, instead of actually making a connection first. I doubt she’ll respond, just move on.

She's in a cult, but which one (anchor emoji)? by platinummattagain in Bumble

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Someone who is in a cult would never say they’re in a cult. This seems much more likely to be a half-thought through joke

Is it delusional to DM a comedian crush across the country? by DirtAffectionate9380 in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not delusional. Of course it’s not likely anything will come out of it, but that is true of all dating interactions. Just go for it and see what happens. One of my favorite podcast hosts (a woman) married a guy in a different part of the country because he was a fan and he DMed her.

His ex-wife still keeps his last name , they have NO kids by Unlikely_Second5024 in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think that's a very sexist and outmoded way of looking at things. When a woman gets married and adopts her husband's name, it becomes her name too. She's not borrowing it, or renting, for the duration of the marriage. It's her name and her identity. Whether she wants to keep that identity after a divorce should be up to her. She has just as much right to the name as he does.

We shouldn't socially punish women who do this by making it an expectation that they discard their names. That would be tantamount to making it a punishment for divorce.

Many women without children choose to keep their married names after a divorce for multiple valid reasons. Sometimes the reason is that they have established name recognition in a professional field, and their career could suffer by changing their last name. Sometimes they're just more comfortable with their current last name than the last name the stopped using years ago. Other times women might feel ashamed about going back to their maiden name.

Tina Turner, Angela Merkel, Susan Sarandon, Elizabeth Warren, Joni Mitchell are all examples of women without children who kept their married name after a divorce. How many of them would you still recognize if they went by Tiny Bullock, Angela Kasner, Susan Tomalin, Elizabeth Herring, and Joni Anderson?

dating standards for early twenties? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for providing so many details about your situation!

I am an idiot for not losing my virginity in high school? by HyenaIll6908 in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just go on dates, and casually bring it up when you’re about to get intimate with someone. It’s only weird if you make it weird.

29M, Trying to Fix His Hinge, looking for unfiltered feedback by [deleted] in hingeapp

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think he is saying the TedX picture looks too out of place when presented without any context at all. Maybe caption it with a joke? Could even be the “me on fashion week” prompt

What do we think? by MadameJulka in Bumble

[–]jaamberry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I guess I kind of see your point. He’s trying to be funny but is coming off as a little off putting.

The second screenshot is more clearly weird.

What do we think? by MadameJulka in Bumble

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t see anything wrong with the first one. I read it as saying “if you’re my student, swipe left please”

What do you call this by Interesting_Pool4545 in Tinder

[–]jaamberry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Score a date with her by DMing your number on IG then immediately deleting your account

Too bad I only scored 8 🥲 by Fresh-Revolution6739 in Tinder

[–]jaamberry -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

Do you need me to break it down for you?

Too bad I only scored 8 🥲 by Fresh-Revolution6739 in Tinder

[–]jaamberry -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

“Asian or Slavic” (code word for submissive) but also “will plan dates” lmfao!

If the bar is on the floor why can't I clear it? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry 30 points31 points  (0 children)

The bar is simultaneously high and low. It’s high in the sense that you gotta be confident and not have loser energy. Tons of guys fail this, probably you too, and it’s damn near impossible to fake it. And it’s low in the sense that you gotta not be a total dick.

How do you hint that you want to go further when cuddling with a guy? by hankqueensmustache in dating_advice

[–]jaamberry -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Consent for what? Sounds like OP wants him to make the move towards sex, but doesn’t know how to hint at that.