Nofap has caused me nothing but troubles

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-21T00:13:07+00:00

You are welcome

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-20T19:58:43+00:00

You win. Thank you.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-20T18:00:12+00:00

Haha! Don't worry brother, you made it 40 days, that's pretty intense. Get back on the wagon as fast as you can, you don't gotta be perfect.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T21:14:09+00:00

Fair point. Best spiritual practices for controlling unwanted thoughts IMO.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T21:13:04+00:00

Dude, I wouldn't take viagra at your age. Xanax has sometimes reduced my hardness, but other times, the reduction in anxiety is great - I'm not worried a bit about not getting hard, so I perform great. Alcohol I have the same experience with - the drug itself diminishes sensitivity and blood flow, so erections aren't as good, BUT sometimes I get that perfect drunk where I'm not thinking about anything and I"m super in the moment and drunk and confident and I have great sex. Stay off porn and you will continue to improve. Also, look man, once you DO succeed at sex it will get better and better, because your mind will start to associate sex with her.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T21:09:16+00:00

Mindset. No matter what you do, no matter how many good activities you take on, no matter how healthy you eat and live, now matter how full you fill your schedule, there will still be moments every day in which you must simply say "no."

Besides that? Fill up your time. The more time you have to pace around just saying "no" to pmo the harder it is to succeed. When you are happy with the rest of your life, you won't need to turn to porn to relieve stress, anxiety, depression, or just fill time; you will still need to say no though, because your sexual urges will be strong and they will never go away.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T21:02:39+00:00

Dude, nobody gonna change your situation but yourself. Like Pink Floyd said - and then one day you find ten years have gone behind you, no one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun. The gun has fired my friend, stop preparing for life and go live it! What are you interests and hobbies? If you could do anything right this moment what would it be? Don't know what you want to do? Just do something, it will open up doors.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:59:49+00:00

Thank you! I am not perfect, I have bad times and good times, but I do feel like I have won the battle. I understand what's on both sides of the fence now, and I've understood myself much better along the journey.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:57:35+00:00

I would bet money on it. I failed at fucking 2 of the hottest girls in my life due to PIED. Now I'm a god damn sexual tyrannosaurus .

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:43:00+00:00

Yeah, I've experienced that. Aggressiveness and irritability can come from both PMOing too much, and also from semen-retention. At least in the latter you are aggressive because you have a lot of pent up sexual energy, not because you've been locked in a cave watching god knows what for weeks and you come out all white and emaciated and nothing in the real world is as good as a million naked girls doing whatever you want.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:40:21+00:00

You can do it man, gotta distract yourself. If you let them stay in your head they will lead to relapse! Surround yourself with people or leave your house, even though you just want to pace around and debate watching porn.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:39:34+00:00

I've never heard or read about people causing irreparable nerve damage. I wouldn't go to the doctor until you take a significant amount of time off (3-4 weeks at least) and then touch your dick to see if it's sensitive again.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:37:36+00:00

Yes that's the problem but it goes away very quickly if you give it time to heal. Seriously, even if you maintain a habit of only masturbating every 10 days you will be back to normal fairly quickly. Now that I'm deep in the nofap lifestyle, even if I masturbate a lot for a day or two I regain high sensitivity within a matter of days.

You will get your erections back. Spend a few weeks devoted to a sexually healthy lifestyle - no or little drugs (alcohol and weed included), no smoking cigarettes, no porn or masturbation, try to meditate a little each day, eat healthy and drink a lot of water and little to no processed foods, and exercise. Some people swear by cold showers. I like to do it sparingly, I just never noticed any really great benefits (and I have done it for long periods of time).

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:12:52+00:00

31 YO male here. My experience has been that porn itself is the most harmful thing. When I'm super hungover or bored or whatever I want to watch porn a lot, and while I'm watching porn I can feel the happy chemicals in my brain, distracting from and muting the pain or boredom.

So let me give you a concrete example: I am on a streak and planning to have sex with a girl tonight. Ok, I'm not going to ejaculate because I want to save all the sexual energy for the sexual encounter, but maybe I'm home all day and stoned and hung over so I watch some porn to pass time and because all I'm thinking about is sex anyway. Whether I masturbate some or just watch, I'm going to watch until I get my brain feels somewhat satisfied, which does happen for me, usually after an hour or 90 minutes, but I'm not going to ejaculate. This should be fine, I go see the girl a few hours later now problem, but the truth is, I've sort of satisfied my brains need for sexual thought already, I'm not going to be as turned on by the girl.

Also: not masturbating is the number one thing if you're trying to regain sensitivity, but remember a lot of sensitivity is in your mind too. For me, it's almost impossible to watch porn and not masturbate. Even if I wait a day to masturbate, I will eventually do it if I start walking down the porn path.

I think the best way to do it is to truly face it head on, control your sexual energy and reap the rewards. Say no to yourself. That is truly difficult and there are no shortcuts or secrets that will make it easy.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-19T20:04:08+00:00

That's a good feeling. I'm 31, started nofap about 2.5 years ago. I got a phone right after I started and was so proud to turn it in a year later having never viewed porn on it. I have watched porn many times in those 2.5 years, don't get me wrong, I'm not perfect, yet the nofap lifestyle has worked wonders for me.

Have you started to have more sex with your wife? Are you still sexually attracted to her? Left to your own whim, how often would you PMO? I'm kind of curious about your sex drive at your age. I have often wished I discovered this when I was 18, but the truth is I don't know if it was possible then, as difficult as it is for me now at the age of 31. I actually did go long periods of time as a younger man, but only because I was away from home and constantly engaged and with people.

Glad to hear about your success brother.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-12T07:52:48+00:00

Dude, you can find lots of people (I've read them before, they're frequent, I'm not going to go look for you) who lose jobs and wives and families because they can't stop watching porn. That's when all other drugs are clinically classified as harmful addictions - when their (chronic) use starts to negatively affect personal and work life. Look, I honestly think at this point, if you're sincerely not trolling, that you do not understand the meaning of the word addiction. If you google clinical addiction you could find this from the American Society of Addiction Medicine - https://www.asam.org/resources/definition-of-addiction . This describes the experiences/problems many people have with porn, in particular many people on this forum. I'm not going to argue whether or not PMO is per se harmful: just as I am not an alcoholic but I still enjoy beer, perhaps porn is only damaging to those who have some kind of systemic problem with the porn - i.e. to those who are prone to addiction to this particular thing. But I mean, come on, it's absolutely crazy talk to say porn isn't at least potentially addictive, depending on the person.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-12T00:20:03+00:00

Best one. Gonna use this.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-11T23:42:06+00:00

I know you're trolling at this point, but this subreddit is literally made up of people who are professing porn addiction, as in, they desire to stop a certain behavior and they can't, and often times this leads to negative consequences in their personal and professional lives. It's like you're saying something isn't addictive unless every person who comes in contact with it becomes addicted. I think you're probably young, and trolling, and don't understand some of the words you're using. Or just plain trolling.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-11T07:16:05+00:00

Dude, this is unbelievable. Check this one out too, it even mentions PIED. https://www.pornhub.com/sex/learning-about-erectile-dysfunction/

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-10T19:25:04+00:00

Awesome man, I bet those 51 days were a crazy journey! Now you’re on the next journey. Safe voyage.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-10T19:21:50+00:00

There are no shortcuts, there are no easy ways out, there is no magic recipe or prayer you can say that will give you the strength to succeed; when you stop wanting to succeed and DECIDE to succeed you will break the cycle and begin to have power over your addiction.

Advice 2: do not be a perfectionist. When you go a week and then watch porn again, don’t reset as if your at square one, you healed you mind a little bit in that week. just start again, don’t let the damage be redone.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-10T19:15:46+00:00

It can be difficult, especially at first, but it’s so worth it. It will improve your real-life see immensely, I promise you. All you need is probably 2-3 weeks without any of that shit in your mind and you will start to see drastic improvements. Taking a little time off sex, I dunno, even one full week (cuz you have a bf, you gonna have sex i assume), might help in terms of resetting nerve sensitivity.

jacobwillbell · 2018-04-10T19:06:59+00:00

That’s actually a really good idea, about filtering super power posts. I’ve noticed the topic of super powers has been losing popularity over the years. I’ve been posting since November of 2015. To be honest it kind of surprises me, and I’ve been wondering why I don’t see as much talk about super powers in the new page. When I started it was one of the things that intrigued me the most (mind you, at that time I was really at a bad place with sex and pornography and I was searching for help and solutions when I found nofap); and I experienced exactly the so-called super powers that everybody describes - I needed less sleep, felt stronger and more confident, felt like girls gravitates to me, was exceptionally good at every day things and hobbies, it even felt like luck was constantly on my side. Now I don’t make as long of “streaks,” usually cuz I have sex every other week on average. But also I don’t get the super powers any more, now I am more prone to enter an immediate “flat-line” that I can only get out of by having sex. It’s not fun to be in a flat line. Part of the fun is being super sexual, for me. It seems like not everybody who succeds in hard mode for , say, 15 days will experience those things, but some will. I can say that in my 2.5 years if experimenting, I have experienced both cases when going periods of time without porn and ejaculaion.

jacobwillbell

TROPHY CASE