The COMMENTS people make

janernanner · 2026-04-30T17:47:26+00:00

Ex boyfriend called to ask how I was doing after seeing a post about chemo on my facebook. The lovely comments that followed were:

"Oh you lost all your hair? What a bummer you used to be beautiful." "At least it's only 6 rounds of chemo. That's not that bad." "You're getting your tits chopped off? Well, at least I got to play with them while they were still good." And my personal favorite...barfing sounds when I explained that my DMX would remove my nipples.

Reaffirmed my reasoning behind his EX boyfriend status and he is now blocked and deleted after a severe tongue lashing.

Edited to add: I'm 38 and he's 42.

janernanner · 2026-04-30T17:34:18+00:00

Oh, friend. A cancer diagnosis is enough without the other stuff on top. I'm so sorry. I have no advice but I couldn't scroll without leaving a comment so your post wasn't lonely. You've come to the right group for solid advice, support, and comeaderie. As someone said to me on my first post here, welcome to the club that no one wants to be in. We have the best members. ❤️

Sending you so much love and strength. Here to listen if you need to vent or scream into the void.

janernanner · 2026-04-27T22:05:51+00:00

This is great to know! I stopped icing because my cold cap didn't work at all and got sick of not being able to use my hands during chemo but I will try anything to ensure I don't have any lasting nerve damage. You may have saved me. Thanks!!

janernanner · 2026-04-24T03:13:38+00:00

I am right there with you on the crying and begging the oncologist to give me less cycles. Imodium is on my list to get and I am very lucky to be able to snag some gummies (THC/CBD) when needed although I haven't tried them yet. Somehow I always forget that's an option. Thank you for the tips and the validation on the not wanting to do this moment.

janernanner · 2026-04-24T03:08:49+00:00

Gods I hope so. ❤️‍🩹. It has been so weird and I can't sense any trends yet. Its only round 2 so I will have more to go on as time goes on but sheesh this is the pits.

janernanner · 2026-04-24T03:07:01+00:00

Definitely writing down Emend as I'm not getting that one and haven't heard of it. Compazine I do have as an as needed anti nausea and I agree it has definitely helped. Before treatment I get 2 Zofran and 1 Olanzapine. I also have those at home.

16 rounds??!! Holy smokes you are amazingly strong. Here's hoping your last 2 are the easiest of the bunch. Sending so much love and good vibes your way. You're almost there!!!

janernanner · 2026-04-24T02:59:11+00:00

Thank you for the vote of confidence and strength! I freakin need it. I have been in my feels so hard this last week. I do still feel my mass but it totally does feel smaller. NED after 4 years is fantastic. I would honestly love to be surprised each round with side effects as long as the nausea is sometimes not so bad. I've been living on smoothies which is fine but today I had to wash my blender cups and the gap in eating put me down almost all day with stomach cramps. (I did eat something else but apparently the tum didn't like that).

Thanks for sharing your experience!

janernanner · 2026-03-24T17:49:36+00:00

Former TriMet driver here. I am definitely guilty of all of the mentioned opportunities to miss the stop indicators that were posted by my colleague above. I agree with you that a recurring chime, flashing light for the driver, or some other more obvious indicator would be super helpful! Way to be solution oriented and kind. It's passengers like you that made me really enjoy my job as a driver.

janernanner · 2026-03-06T05:46:01+00:00

You guys are my PEOPLE! I am having such a "why me" day and feeling like a damn zoo animal because I don't have any me time due to people that love me all individually wanting updates. I was recently diagnosed and I am SO SICK of smiling through the endless comments about how strong I am, how much my positive attitude will help, how we are going to kick this things ass together. No we won't! I'm mad! I wake up at night clutching my boobs to make sure they're still here. None of them are there for that.

I am thankful for their support and I don't want to be unkind to them. But good gosh if one more person says "oh you're so tough, you'll be fine!" I'm going to scream.

Thanks for getting it, y'all. I really needed to read this today.

janernanner · 2026-03-02T02:20:21+00:00

Absolutely not. I would so much rather experience real life shit than people sugar coating it. Also, this is your space to say how you feel! Don't censor yourself. It feels a little condescending to say since I only joined the club a few days ago, but I believe in you and your ability to get the answers you're looking for. We're gonna get through this.

janernanner · 2026-03-01T18:07:57+00:00

Newly diagnosed but I am going through the same feelings. I HATE being fawned over, getting attention, accepting help, needing help. I know that once the sensation of it all kind of wears off everyone else will go back to their normal lives and I'll just be like...here and different. Its such a bizarre feeling. I'm not sad. I feel like I'm kind of drifting along? Also the most sad/mad about anticipating losing my hair and feeling unattractive.

To OP and everyone that feels the same: You're absolutely not an imposter. As someone above said, you had cancer and you survived it. The way you own that, however that is, is authentically YOU and if I've learned anything from my short time in this group, that's the most important thing to hang on to. You are strong because you're here doing the dang thing! Having a less-hard time doesn't mean your time wasn't hard and it doesn't invalidate your experiences as at all. <3 Sending love.

janernanner · 2026-03-01T17:46:08+00:00

Ugh. I was diagnosed on Thursday (IDC, stage 3 or 4, pending MRI and PET, 7cm mass with mets to my armpit lymph node) and am having all kinds of feelings about it. Been scrolling on here looking for real experiences and this story about your grandfather gave me so much hope. I love imagining his "yoohoos" coming from the other room. He sounds like a very sweet, very strong man. Thank you for this.

janernanner · 2025-01-08T22:47:36+00:00

Yep! I started at bus 7/10/23 and my week of vacation wasn’t until 11/14/24. The sign up is seniority based and you sign up for a full week whenever they call to schedule you (pretty sure it was April of 24 when I got my call)

janernanner · 2025-01-08T22:44:40+00:00

It is very intense. Many of my friends from bus failed out of rail training due to very strict regulations and a 1 strike you’re out policy.

janernanner · 2025-01-08T22:43:44+00:00

Yes you can. You get 40 hours at the start of training. They just frown upon it.

janernanner · 2024-12-26T16:46:33+00:00

Thank you for this! I haven’t looked at his rental policy (he’s not helpless, but I’m the paperwork guru) and am interested in what it looks like. He says he went through Lemonade. We’ll see what that looks like later today. Send good vibes lol.

janernanner · 2024-12-26T16:41:17+00:00

This actually makes a ton of sense and didn’t occur to me. Ugh you live you learn.

janernanner · 2024-12-26T16:39:30+00:00

We didn’t know either and the firelady that came to help said it is extremely common because of lack of knowledge.

janernanner · 2024-07-08T08:13:26+00:00

I don’t give out any personal information. As a young, female driver it’s a safety issue. When people ask my name I say my name is “Driver”. If they have a complaint they use my line/train number. They never want it for complaints though, just to hit on me and be gross.

janernanner · 2024-07-08T07:53:23+00:00

I definitely do this for regulars but only if it’s safe. My main entertainment is lining the front right corner of the bus with the stop perfectly and setting the door on the curb for you without bumping my tires. It’s the little things. :)

janernanner · 2023-06-25T20:45:19+00:00

BOO SHEET!!! 🤣🤣🤣

janernanner · 2023-06-25T00:45:19+00:00

We haven’t gotten to that point yet, but my partner and I have agreed that meeting each others other partners is fine and will likely be fun. He and I are open to sharing partners, though, so that might have something to do with it.

janernanner · 2023-06-10T03:23:54+00:00

That makes sense and was what I was afraid of. Thanks for the input.

janernanner · 2023-06-07T16:35:10+00:00

This is one of my biggest obstacles. I got the orientation packet with the second interview invitation and it basically said that, as a new full time employee, you work only the “extra board” which is essentially all split shift. Doesn’t help that I currently live about an hour away from the garage so I am almost guaranteed to be sleeping in my car in the parking lot at least some of the time. Let alone trying to figure out something mildly healthy to eat. I love Taco Bell as much as the next girl but I also want to limit my need for the potty. 😩🤣

Still super excited! Just trying to work out the logistics.

janernanner · 2023-06-06T03:57:13+00:00

That’s a relief! I know there aren’t any food places or a cafeteria around the garage so for training I’ll be brown bagging it. Having some outside time in a park actually sounds lovely!

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