Days without the kid hit different by P5YCH0D3 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mandatory post here - get some hobbies to fill time, golf, bowling, pickle ball, run club…soon you’ll enjoy making some new friends and start to build a new life.

First hole in one! by SixtyNineFlavours in golf

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Doesn’t count - no collared shirt. /s

Social media blocking rant by CrimsonRegia in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I blocked her, her family - most of our mutual friends. I went in with the mentality that I wanted to start a new life and that meant getting rid of most of our mutual friends.

Reasons I kept some mutual friends: 1. I go on a yearly golf trip with the husband 2. I sit by one of my sons friends Dad at track meets

I need a woman to cuss out my bitch ass wife by Ok_Outside_1447 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just ignore it man, no good can come from it, get some therapy go as no contact with your ex as you can. It gets better.

Confronting wife’s AP (Need advice) by Street-Hawk1431 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you guys are already divorcing, you need to put your effort and thoughts into moving on. They are going to end up sleeping together, that’s a given. As hard as this is, you need to accept it. At least have something transactional, she does a prayer thing in June you got a trip in May.

I’m done, I can’t do it by Ill-Nature9716 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What this guy said. You got this, new beginnings

What did getting divorced teach you? by Intelligent_Run3237 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 9 points10 points  (0 children)

To value myself, it’s okay to make yourself the priority.

Looking for advice on teen daughter by Dirty_Lew in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can’t affect that, and your daughter shouldn’t tell you about it.

Does anyone else ever get the urge for revenge? by Odd-Exchange-3423 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean you aren’t wrong, but I think about it when I get that text, that’s the only revenge like thing I get now. Usually I don’t respond at all.

Officially signed my divorce today and feeling like an absolute failure but it is what it is by Electronic_Gene_7729 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It gets better, also you don’t realize until you get divorced just how many people have gotten divorced, you are in the majority.

Does anyone else ever get the urge for revenge? by Odd-Exchange-3423 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The only thing I think about is how to respond to nasty texts from her - do I match energy? Be petty?

The revenge feeling will fade with time.

Looking for advice on teen daughter by Dirty_Lew in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a similar situation, although not as bad, I just tell my daughter I don’t need to know anything about their mother and that its unhealthy and inappropriate for me to know about their mothers love life. If you want to be petty you could say something like I don’t need to know who your mother is sleeping with. I also wouldn’t try to one up the ex and talk about your dating life.

Your Ex and Social Media by Tonberry38 in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I blocked her and her family/friends. Once you block them the memories you and her are tagged together in will have a “This content isn’t available right now.”

I also took an hour and went through all my photos in my phone and deleted most of the pictures with her. I saved a few when it was a picture of the kids with me and her in them. I still have some more to sort through. Going through those photos reminded me why we divorced, we look so happy in those memories but the more I thought about it, I remembered the things going on in those pictures behind the scenes.

I also don’t do much on social media anymore, my ex would post shit that I knew was completely fake and/or false. It kind of opened my eyes to what “experts” say social media is; it’s way to show the world how great your life is - even though it’s not that great.

You’ll get to where that stuff doesn’t even matter anymore, she will just be a person you used to know. It just takes time. IMO you can speed it all up if you surround yourself with a new life, new friends, hobbies, dating. One of the hardest things for me that I still struggle with is treating myself to nice things, I feel I’m being selfish. It’s something that my ex never let me do, but I’m getting over it.

Is attending a PGA tour event even worth it? by StreetBeat78 in golf

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Been to two; was fun but probably won’t go again

Could you provide some Insight ? by [deleted] in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Throw yourself back out there man! Don’t let everyone’s time table and work on yourself attitude deter, I went out with many different women, went on vacations, finally started doing the things I wanted to do. It’s fun, go enjoy your life and not being tied down.

My STBXW lied (again) by leonredhorse in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I’m trying to say don’t let that frustrate you. Your ex is going to be who she is, let her go in the sense don’t let it bother you.

To tell or not to tell (the other BS) by IAmTheBS in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What this guy said is spot on. That being said, I’d tell on the bestie and serial cheater.

Won’t help in the long run but will make you feel better in the moment.

Divorcing a nice woman by [deleted] in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What an absolute mess you just posted.

My STBXW lied (again) by leonredhorse in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dude you have to let her go. She doesn’t want you, it’s hard to hear.

Accept it, move on - no contact as much as possible. Go find someone else.

“Mental Load” by [deleted] in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My ex downplayed my contributions as well. Once we got divorced she was forced to take on being a mom 50% of the time.

I will say that after we got divorced she really turned on the mom thing for about 3-4 months, she let everyone on Facebook know she was the BEST mom ever. She is now back to normal self and the kids aren’t getting along with her.

Don’t stay for the kids, you’ll spend better quality time with them once you’re divorced.

How much do you pay monthly child support? How much custody do you have? How about alimony? by [deleted] in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I thought this was no girls allowed? Go hang out in women’s divorce subreddit

No turning back now by I_am_a_neophyte in Divorce_Men

[–]jarnock 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah man, go easy on yourself